Fireproof -- A Love That Dares Series

Paul also states that love is about giving kindness. What does that mean exactly? How does that work out in a marriage? Kindness is love in action. Kindness is compassion and sympathy and gentleness. Kindness is thoughtfulness, consideration, and helpfulness. I do not wish to belabor the point, but Paul says that love cannot be just on the inside, but that it needs to leak out into our words, in our actions, and in how we are helpful to our spouse.

Kindness is using the nice word instead of the condescending one.

Kindness is helping when you don’t really want to.

Kindness is being considerate and having good manners day after day in difficult circumstances.

Love Dare:

God dares you to have persistent tolerance with your spouse.

God dares you to be kind in word and deed.

II. LOVE IS ABOUT GRACE AND NOT GUILT

READ 1 CORINTHIANS 13:5b-6

“[love] it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.”

As we look at these verses today and we think about marriage, verses 5-6 in 1 Corinthians are all about arguing in marriage. In these verses, I see the couple who walk on egg shells around each other because each word is suspect and can cause an argument. In these verses, we see the couple who when they argue, dredge up all the old mistakes and all the old words that have been said into new arguments. We see the couple that does not forgive but holds grudges. In these verses, we see the spouse who does not help when the other is in distress. We see a couple who does not offer words of apology and those words are not accepted even if they are offered.

Loving God’s way means that we work towards not being easily angered when our spouse overspends. It means offering grace when the other messes up with the kids or disciplines poorly. It means not saying “I told you so” when it is well deserved. God is not telling us to love in a manner that He doesn’t already do. Exodus 34:6 says, “The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.” This same exact thought is repeated in the book of Numbers, Nehemiah, Psalms, Joel, Jonah, and Nahum and that is just in the Old Testament. He forgives us over and over. Psalm 103:12 tells us, He does not bring up past sin. God loves us the way He wants us to love other people.

Now, you may say to me… ‘I’m not God. He is perfect. He can love that way because He is God and you don’t know my marriage!’ You are right… you are not God and you are not perfect, but that doesn’t mean we do not strive with all our might for His standard of love. And to be honest, most of the time we don’t try all that hard. Shame on us.

Love Dare:

God dares you to have grace when arguing and not bringing up old arguments into the present

God dares you to be gracious in your words with each other.

III. LOVE IS ABOUT CHOICE AND NOT ABOUT FEELING

READ 1 CORINTHIANS 13:7-8