Sermons

Summary: Ananias hears God’s call - how he recognizes and reacts to God’s instructions.

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10Now there was a disciple at Damascus named Ananias; and the Lord said to him in a vision, “Ananias.” And he said, “Here I am, Lord.” And the Lord said to him, “Get up and go to the street called Straight, and inquire at the house of Judas for a man from Tarsus named Saul, for he is praying, and he has seen in a vision a man named Ananias come in and lay his hands on him, so that he might regain his sight.” But Ananias answered, “Lord, I have heard from many about this man, how much harm he did to Your saints at Jerusalem; and here he has authority from the chief priests to bind all who call on Your name.” But the Lord said to him, “Go, for he is a chosen instrument of Mine, to bear My name before the Gentiles and kings and the sons of Israel; for I will show him how much he must suffer for My name’s sake.” So Ananias departed and entered the house, and after laying his hands on him said, “Brother Saul, the Lord Jesus, who appeared to you on the road by which you were coming, has sent me so that you may regain your sight and be filled with the Holy Spirit.” And immediately there fell from his eyes something like scales, and he regained his sight, and he got up and was baptized; and he took food and was strengthened.

Sometimes, what we say is not what we mean. Have you ever had that experience, where you say one thing, and it comes out as something else? Church secretaries are not immune from this. A friend sent me this e-mail some time ago with some "Bulletin Bloopers"

TOP 15 BLOOPERS FOUND IN CHURCH BULLETINS

15. Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

14. The Pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the breakfast next Sunday morning.

13. Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday from 7 to 8 p.m. Please use the back door.

12. Ushers will eat latecomers.

11. For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

10. Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

9. The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

8. The concert held in the Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister’s daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which, as usual, fell upon her.

7. On a church bulletin during the pastor’s illness: GOD IS GOOD, Pastor Hargreaves is better.

6. Potluck supper: prayer and medication to follow.

5. Don’t let worry kill you off - let the church help.

4. The Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to the church secretary.

3. Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

2. The choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir!!

AND THE NUNIBER I BLOOPER FOUND IN CHURCH BULLETINS:

1. Weight Watchers will meet at 7 p.m. Please use large double door at the side entrance.


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