Summary: As adults we live lies that create stress in our lives. I want to talk to you about the lies we live.
This first lie is:
1. I have to meet everybody’s needs
A. Many people struggle with trying to meet everybody’s needs. It’s this superman or superwoman complex that says I have to be there for everybody. I have to help all my relatives: 1st, 2nd, 3rd & 4th cousins. I know my son is 45 years old but I have to keep paying is rent. My baby needs me. I have to help everybody at work. They need me! Those people at work won’t make without me. I have to help everybody in my neighborhood. All 100 of my friends need me! They can’t survive without me.
People who live this lie, live under constant stress and pressure. I know, because in the early days of People’s Church, I lived this lie. As a pastor, I felt like I had to meet everybody’s needs. A lot of pastors struggle with this. There’s this pressure of I have to counsel everybody, help everybody, visit everybody in the hospital, marry everybody, meet everybody’s needs. I learned that living this lie is unrealistic and unhealthy.
Let me show you a man in the bible who lived the lie of I have to meet everybody’s needs.
Ex 18:13-18 The next day Moses took his seat to serve as judge for the people, and they stood around him from morning till evening. 14 When his father-in-law saw all that Moses was doing for the people, he said, "What is this you are doing for the people? Why do you alone sit as judge, while all these people stand around you from morning till evening?" 15 Moses answered him, "Because the people come to me to seek God's will. 16 Whenever they have a dispute, it is brought to me, and I decide between the parties and inform them of God's decrees and laws." 17 Moses' father-in-law replied, "What you are doing is not good. 18 You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone. (NIV)
B. Jethro told Moses that trying to meet everybody’s needs isn’t good! Having the superman or superwoman complex isn’t good! You can meet some needs but you can’t meet every need. You ought to help some people but you can’t help all people! You’re not God! 1. It’s not good because you're wearing yourself out: 2. It’s not good because you’re living a stressed out life trying to meet everybody’s needs. 3. You’re frustrating people because you’re over promising and under delivering. You’re over committing yourself. 4. You’re robbing other people from being used by God
C. Questions to ask yourself to break free from this lie: 1. How is/will this affecting my relationship with God? 2. How is/will this affecting you personally: mentally, physically, emotionally? 3. How is this affecting my spouse and kids? 4. How is this affecting my job?
2. Everybody has to like me
A. Everyone of us wants to be liked by people. The problem occurs when we start believing the lie that everyone HAS to like me. When you believe this lie, you start living to please people instead living to please God! The bible says: