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Summary: Learn about how to find the right mate without compromise.

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Needle in a Haystack

The Search for True Love

I. Introduction

Since I was a little shy when I was in high school, I didn’t ask many girls out on dates. So my friend came up to me one day and said, “Hey, I’ve lined you up with a great date for Saturday night. It’s all set.”

“Who is it?” I asked. It turned out to be his cousin Doris. I had never met her. In fact, I had never met any girl named Doris. “Oh, no,” I said, “I’m not going on a blind date.”

“Hey, don’t worry about this one,” my friend said. “Doris is a terrific girl. And trust me—she’s a babe. But if you don’t believe me, I’ll tell you how to get out of the date if you don’t like the way she looks. This is what I do: I go to a girl’s front door to pick her up, and when she opens the door, I check her out. If I like what I see, then great, we’re all set. But if she’s ugly, I fake an asthma attack. I go ‘Aaahhhhgggggg!’ (Hold your throat like you’re having trouble breathing.) The girl asks, ‘What’s wrong?’ And I say, ‘It’s my asthma.’ And so we have to call off the date. Just like that. No problemo.”

“Well, I don’t know...but okay, it sounds easy enough. I’ll do it,” I said.

So I went to pick up Doris. I knocked on the door, and within seconds, she was standing right in front of me. I took a look at her, and to my surprise, my friend was right. She was beautiful! I stood there not knowing exactly what to say.

She took one look at me and went, “Aaahhhhgggggg!”

Hopefully, you haven’t had any dates like the ones that end before they begin. Tonight, we’re going to talk about the search for true love. Last week, we talked about the essence of true love, so tonight we’ll talk about how to find it in the right person.

You must know one thing before you look for something. What is it? What is the one thing you must know before you look for something? What are you looking for? You have to ask yourself this question before you go off looking for true love. That way, when you think you’ve found it, you can compare it to what you already know it’s supposed to look like.

II. What Am I Looking For?

Psalm 37:3, 4 “Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.”

What do you desire in a mate? Do you want a hottie? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe you could care less about how a person looks because the truth is that beauty is only skin deep. The real beauty is that which comes from within. Remember that. You can be attracted to someone because of his or her personality, you know. I had several friends like that in high school, girls, of course. These friends of mine weren’t exactly Miss Teen USA or anything, but they had incredible qualities that made them attractive. Those qualities are things you want to consider when asking yourself, “What am I looking for?”

Somebody tell me what you look for in a guy or girl.

After I got burned in a few relationships, somebody encouraged me to make a list of what my wife would be like. So, I did. After I made that list, I compared every girl I knew to the list. At this point, I was in college and I wasn’t interested in pursuing meaningless relationships. So I maintained friendships with girls rather than “playing the field.” The friends I had, I compared them to the list. If they didn’t meet the standard, they weren’t up to par and I knew that I’d never pursue anything more than a friendship with them. So, I encourage you to do the same thing. Make a list and check it twice. Only then will you find out who is naughty and who is nice.


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