In Jesus Name Text: Genesis 2:18
What an exciting day! Family and Friends have come together to celebrate a major event in your lives. This day is a milestone marker in your journey through life. Many hours of work, planning by lots of people has enabled this to be a day of great memories to be cherished.
We had great conversations together regarding life, your relationship with God and what will be necessary for a successful marriage. The walk to the altar of marriage began with your friendship. Friendship then grew into love. Love flows to commitment. Love is a very difficult word for some people to define.
To be loved, is to know acceptance, to experience intimacy. To truly experience love one must be able to give love and be unselfish. Why? Because selfishness, self serving actions, concern for self, even at the expense of others will always destroy love and destroy people.
If you dated anyone like that…you did not date them long.
Your marriage today, is happening in an American culture where love almost always seems to be conditional and contractual and commitment is a rare thing. In an age when you are suppose to be self-fulfilled; self actualized, self starting the word commitment is unpopular.
Yet that is what you are promising each other today. In the beginning God knew that as human beings we can not experience fulfillment, purpose in life alone. God said, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable….for him.”
______ I know you love ________ and you understand that she is a gift from God to you. You would be a lost soul if she had not committed herself to “loving you”. Mark, you have experienced the unconditional love Allyson reaching out to you pull you from a world of lostness. Her love for you is truly an example of God’s love for both of you. It is God in Christ who has redeemed our lives on the cross and from the empty grave. In the same way, ________, God has brought this man into your life to love you; to speak tender words of acceptance and care, and so in turn you too have glimpsed the love of God through ________ love for you.
I know that you both want an authentic Christian marriage. In order to have a solid marriage you can not give each other “left over time, not throwaway time. What you need is unhurried, uninterrupted time,” while you live in a busy, instant gratification society.
A superficial marriage is one where the husband gets all wrapped up in his job, his continuing education, and working extra hours. The wife, is wrapped up in her job, her career, and they find time to squeeze in the kids. The result is that you pass each other in the drive way, the hallway and walk-in closet. You may sleep in the same bed and occasionally sit at the same dinner table but you wonder where the intimacy has gone.
Do not settle for merely cohabiting. Insist on more. Fight for an authentic Christian marriage. Set a date night. Go for an evening walk, toss out TV and Video games and sit at the table talking to each other and help each other with the dishes. Why? Because the results are worth it.
No one ever said commitment, intimacy and love in marriage is easy…. But is anything more important than making a house a home?
One of my favorite quotes regarding marriage is by Howard Hendricks, author and professor at Dallas Theological Seminary. I used this quote at your brother’s wedding. As a matter of fact I use it at most weddings because it is a truth that needs to be visible in a culture that tries to tell you that truth is relative.
“The home, your home, is to be a safe harbor for you and your children.” The world and people in the world will seek to steel your self worth and the self worth of your children. Your home, under the umbrella of God’s love must be that umbrella of safety for each other and your children.
The wedding ring you will exchange is a visible reminder of God’s never ending love. Your wedding ring is a visible reminder of your commitment to each other.
The moment you each were born into the world, God was there smiling at your birth. He wanted each of you to know His love. He did not need to create you, but he chose to create you. He knows your individual needs and has brought you together.
When Adam and Eve disobeyed God, sin entered the world that had been perfect. Instead of experiencing unselfish love, the world was turned upside down, and the blame game started. Unselfish love for one another flipped and selfishness became part of our world. God calls a Christian marriage to overcome that selfishness.
God has promised to work with you, mold you and shape you so that love, unselfish love, blended like fine wine with words of forgiveness, will give your life all that you need to experience inner joy and satisfaction.
Walk with God. Demonstrate acceptance & commitment.
