22 After this, Jesus and his disciples went out into the Judean countryside, where he spent some time with them, and baptized. 23 Now John also was baptizing at Aenon near Salim, because there was plenty of water, and people were constantly coming to be baptized. 24 (This was before John was put in prison.) 25 An argument developed between some of John’s disciples and a certain Jew over the matter of ceremonial washing. 26 They came to John and said to him, "Rabbi, that man who was with you on the other side of the Jordan--the one you testified about--well, he is baptizing, and everyone is going to him." 27 To this John replied, "A man can receive only what is given him from heaven. 28 You yourselves can testify that I said, ’I am not the Christ but am sent ahead of him.’ 29 The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. 30 He must become greater; I must become less. 31 "The one who comes from above is above all; the one who is from the earth belongs to the earth, and speaks as one from the earth. The one who comes from heaven is above all. 32 He testifies to what he has seen and heard, but no one accepts his testimony. 33 The man who has accepted it has certified that God is truthful. 34 For the one whom God has sent speaks the words of God, for God gives the Spirit without limit. 35 The Father loves the Son and has placed everything in his hands. 36 Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God’s wrath remains on him." John 3:22-36
Well having just spoken with Nicodemus in Jerusalem, Jesus now goes to the countryside and spends some time with His disciples. And what I want us to notice here is three relationships that are shown to us. There’s John’s disciples and the Jews (verses 22-26), there’s John and Jesus (verses 27-30), and finally there’s the Bride and Bridegroom (verse 29). Let’s notice what the Bible says about each relationship as we look at this passage together:
The first relationship is John’s disciples and the Jews, and this relationship is characterized by arguments and jealousy. Note what it says: 25 An argument developed between some of John’s disciples and a certain Jew over the matter of ceremonial washing. 26 They came to John and said to him, "Rabbi, that man who was with you on the other side of the Jordan--the one you testified about--well, he is baptizing, and everyone is going to him." Arguments and jealousy.
You see there is legalism in this relationship. They are arguing over the law and ceremonial tradition and religious washing. You can imagine the Jews, who have not submitted to baptism saying, “the law requires the washing of hands, and all utensils, and the cleansing of everything both before and after each meal,” and John’s disciples are like, “you know what really needs cleansing is your heart. You need to be washed from your sins.” And the Jews say, “we hold to the Law of Moses, and the law says…” And they are arguing and disputing, because wherever you have legalism you have arguing. Listen to what Paul writes to Titus:
9 But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless. Titus 3:9
Now, what is legalism? Well it is focusing on the externals. These Jews were all about external cleansing, ceremonial washing. Jesus said this about them in Matthew 23:25:
25 "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside are full of greed and self-indulgence. Matthew 23:25
Legalism is externalism, wanting to clean someone up to look good on the outside. Christianity has been given to legalism down through the centuries. This past century had a huge focus on clothes, that men had to wear suits and women had to wear dresses, there was no card playing allowed, certainly no dancing. But do you know what you find in churches that are focused on the externals? Quarreling and jealousy. Legalism comes from people who have small hearts and young faith, whereas Christian love comes from those with large hearts and mature faith.
You know one thing I absolutely love about Jesus Christ? He cared for people’s hearts. If Jesus were sitting here with us today, He wouldn’t care what we wore or where we worked, or anything external. He would want to know how our hearts are. And whether we had quarreling and jealousy or love and unity. Whether we judged each other or loved each other. Man looks on the outward appearance but God looks at the heart.
This relationship between John’s disciples and the Jews was unhealthy because there were some there who cared about externals, about ceremonialism, which brought arguments and division.
But look at the next relationship, John the Baptist and Jesus Christ. If the first relationship was characterized by legalism, this relationship is characterized by Lordship. They said, “everyone is going to him." 27 To this John replied, " 29 The bride belongs to the bridegroom.30 He must become greater; I must become less. 31 "The one who comes from heaven is above all.”
If legalism results in arguing and jealousy, accepting the Lordship of Christ results in submission and humility. The people say to John, “everybody is going to Jesus”, John says, “they belong with Him.” They’re the bride of Christ and the bride belongs with the bridegroom. And look at the submission of John in verse 31: 31 "The one who comes from above is above all; the one who is from the earth belongs to the earth, and speaks as one from the earth. The one who comes from heaven is above all.” John says, “Jesus is from heaven, He is God. I’m from earth, I’m just a man.” He is acknowledging the lordship of Jesus, that Jesus is exalted and stating that all people need to go to Him.
And look at the humility of John in verse 30, “He must become greater, I must become less.”
This relationship is healthy because there is humble submission in it. The main problem with people taking offense at others today is just pride. It is the opposite of Ephesians 4:2: “2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love”. Paul says we are to “be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves” (Romans 12:10). Because we’ve bowed our knee to King Jesus, we’re able to humble ourselves to one another as well. Humility and submission characterize this relationship.
And then comes the next relationship, bride and bridegroom. If the first relationship was characterized by legalism, the next relationship by lordship, this relationship is characterized by love. If the first relationship resulted in quarreling and jealousy, and the second relationship submission and humility, the third relationship is characterized by love and intimacy. A bridegroom and a bride, sharing exquisite delight in each other. And that is the desire of John the Baptist, as the Bridegroom’s friend, that all people would go to Jesus and become His bride.
So let me state this clearly this morning, do you know what you were made for? Do you know why you are here on this earth? You were made, you were placed on this earth to be in an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. “3 Now this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent”. John 17:3 You were created to know Christ, to be His bride. John the Baptist is excited that people are going to Jesus, because the bride is supposed to be with the bridegroom.
This is illustrated in Genesis 2 where Adam was alone and God said it was not good for man to be alone, so he put Adam into a deep sleep, opened up his side, took out a rib and made him a wife. Then Adam knew Eve and they had a son. The very reason for Eve’s existence was to be Adam’s bride and to know him.
Even so, when Jesus Who is called “the last Adam” came, He too was put into a deep sleep on the cross, the sleep of death, and He had His side opened, and out came blood to forgive and water to cleanse, the very things needed to make us His bride.
John the Baptist says, “oh they’re going over to Jesus are they? Well of course they are, they’re His bride, not mine. They’re made for Him, not me.”
And so we have these 3 relationships pointed out to us in this passage: the one defined by arguments and jealousy, the one defined by submission and humility, and the last one defined by love and intimacy.
As we see these three situations in the Bible this morning, I want to suggest to you that these 3 relationships tell the life story of every Christian. There was a time when we quarreled with God and others, when our lives were characterized by acts of the flesh, arguments and division, jealousy and quarreling, pride and offense at other people. But then came that moment when we saw Jesus as Lord, when we bowed our knee in submission to Him, received pardon for our sins, and power to live a new life, not perfectly but progressively. And as we submitted to His Lordship in our lives we were brought into the most intimate of all relationships, a relationship so intimate that it can only be described as that between bride and bridegroom. From arguments, jealousy and pride, to submission to King Jesus, to entering into the embrace of our Lover. From legalism, to Lordship to Love.
Where are you this morning? Are you characterized by strife, can’t get along with others, judging by external appearances? If so, then you need to humble yourself before the Lord, bow your knee and confess Christ as Lord, and receive His forgiveness and pardon. Or are you at the place where you realize that the purpose of your life, the reason you exist is to enjoy a love relationship with your Bridegroom?
We need to consider carefully where we are this morning because of eternity. Eternity, where did that come from? Well it came from verse 36: 36 Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God’s wrath remains on him." So we see that we either have eternal life, through faith in God’s Son, or eternal loss through forsaking God’s Son. So now we see the importance of considering where we are at this morning.
And now in closing, I want to have a word with the men here today. Ladies can go to that happy place in your minds for a little while. Men, John the Baptist was a faithful minister, and you and I are called into pastoral ministry in your homes. The Bible tells us that every man is a priest, and every Christian a minister. Men, we are like John the Baptist here in that we are to be faithful ministers of Christ. I want to give you just 3 things from this text that shows us what John the Baptist did:
First, he pointed people away from himself and to Jesus. John was like a big arrow pointing to Christ. He prepared the way for people to receive Christ. To be faithful ministers we are to commend Jesus to the hearts of our congregations. Faithful ministers are to bring love-letters and messages from Christ, courting our family and pledging them to Jesus. Men, you are to be arrows pointing your family to Christ.
Secondly, look at verse 30. It says that the friends of the bridegroom must wait and listen for him. John the Baptist waited and listened for the voice of the bridegroom. I cannot stress how important this is. Ministers must get alone with Christ, hear His voice, receive instructions from him. We must get God’s vision for our families, and for our church, that we might lead based upon what God shows us. This only comes as we do exactly what verse 30 says: “wait and listen for Him.” Men, it is a rare thing in today’s church that men will get alone with God and “wait and listen for Him.” But that is precisely what our families need from us.
Thirdly, John the Baptist found joy in the voice of Jesus. Verse 29 says, he “is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice.” We are to find joy in the voice of Jesus, we are to rejoice in the Word of God. So that people know us as those who love their Bibles and love hearing the voice of Christ.
So these 3 things are important: that we point our families to Christ, that we “wait and listen” for Christ, and that we learn how to find joy in Christ.
Let’s pray together: Father in heaven, forgive us when we have argued instead of loved, when we have been prideful instead of humble, when our lives were characterized by division and judging, instead of true love and honoring others above ourselves. Help us men to be faithful ministers of the gospel by pointing others away from us and Jesus, by getting alone with you and listening to you, and by finding our joy in your Word. And thank you so much for our bridegroom, the Lord Jesus, Who slept in death, and whose side was opened, that we might become His bride and rejoice that the heart of God is open for even us. In Jesus’ Name, Amen!”
