OPEN: Weddings are times of excitement and great celebration, and different cultures have different ways of celebrating their marriages.
• In Bulgaria – the bride tosses a dish filled with wheat, coins and a raw egg over her head. If the dish breaks it signifies good luck to come.
• African weddings often involve wine, wheat, pepper, salt, honey, bitter herbs, water, a pot and spoon, a broom, a spear, a shield, and a copy of the Bible. Each one represents a different aspect of the love and strength which unites two families.
• In the Caribbean it’s customary for the mother of the bride to make and then pass on the recipe for the wedding cake called the "Black Cake." The basic ingredients include a dozen fresh eggs, a pound of flour, a pound of brown sugar, a pound of butter, and a pound of glazed cherries, raisins, prunes, currants.
Each of those customs represents the value and importance that that culture sees in marriage.
Marriage is seen as one of the greatest events in their lives
And that’s the very imagery God wants to place in our minds here in Revelation 19.
When Jesus comes again, there’s going to be a great wedding feast.
It’s going to be one of the greatest events in our lives.
1000s upon 1000s of people and angels will gathered in a great celebration.
Folks will be all dressed up in the finest of clothing.
There’s going to be a lot of shouting and singing and rejoicing.
And the excitement will seemingly never end.
(pause) God loves marriage.
God created marriage for us.
God performed the first marriage in the garden with Adam and Eve.
And God uses the idea of marriage to explain His relationship with us in the church.
In Ephesians 5 Paul explains how Christian husbands and wives should treat each other.
Then he writes "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery— but I am talking about Christ and the church.” Eph 5:31-32
Even when Paul (guided by the Spirit of God) even when he’s talking about physical marriage he can’t avoid explaining the more powerful application of this ceremony.
Jesus is the groom and the church is His bride
When Jesus comes again, He’s going to bring us as His bride into His father’s house.
And then we’re going to live with Him there forever.
It’s the ultimate Cinderella story. And all of the old fairy tales about Prince Charming and his bride couldn’t even begin to compare with what we’re going to experience at 2nd coming.
And so in Revelation 19, God is trying to get us to see that when Jesus comes again, and this great wedding feast takes place, it’s going to be one of the greatest events in our lives. NOTHING we’ve ever known will even begin to compare with what we’ll experience on that day.
(pause) But then – here in Revelation 19 – we see the oddest thing.
John is so overwhelmed by what he sees that he starts to bow down at the feet of the angel.
In Revelation 19:10 John tells us
“At this I fell at his feet to worship him (the angel)
But he said to me, "Do not do it! I am a fellow servant with you and with your brothers who hold to the testimony of Jesus. Worship God!...”
What had happened?
Why had John done this?
Why – in the middle of observing this great wedding feast - why would John bow down and begin to worship this angel.
Well… John got distracted.
He saw all the festivities, the crowds, the excitement, the celestial celebration, and he just figured the angel was part of the deal. And since he couldn’t bow down to God at that moment John decided to settle for the next best thing.
The next best thing (pause)
You know it’s not that unusual for people to do that. There are lots of folks who are willing to settle for the next best thing. They make decisions all the time where they settle for something less than the best. They even do it with marriage.
ILLUS: According to my research – in the United States of America – the marriage rate has declined almost 20% from 1995 thru 2005. The same study found that the number of couples “living together” went up 10 fold from 500,000 in 1970 to 5 million today. (The National Marriage Project reported by The Pastor’s Weekly Briefing 6/13/08)
Another study (done on-line by AOL and Zogby) found that nearly half of their respondents (44%) between the ages of 20 and 69 said they didn’t need marriage to validate their relationships. And a majority of those in their 30s (73%) said they would prefer to live together before marriage. (an online survey by AOL Personals and Zogby International taken in November 2007)
More and more people in our nation are settling for the next best thing to marriage.
They decide – instead of marriage – to live together.
And you can understand some of the appeal.
According to David R. Gudgel, author of “Before You Live Together”
“The number one reason couples move in together is to test their long-term compatibility”
Ok, that seems to make sense. Kinda.
But does that work? Does the next best thing create the happiness and pleasure that just waiting for marriage gives.
No! But then substitutes for God’s will and way in our lives never do.
ILLUS: A recent study by the Penn State University interviewed 92 couples found
In general, those who lived together before marriage were
• more verbally aggressive,
• more hostile and
• less supportive than those who waited until marriage to live together.
(http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/nm/20020215/hl_nm/living_1&cid=594)
ILLUS: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, found that 70 % of those who lived together for at least five years did eventually walk down the aisle. But these marriages were also more likely to break up.
After 10 years, 40% of couples that had lived together before marriage had broken up. That’s a higher percentage of divorce than those who didn’t live together 1st experienced. (msn.com July 24, 2002)
Wade Horn, a marriage expert at the Department of Health and Human Services explains:
“When living together the attitude is “I vow to stay together with you as long as you make me happy.” In a marriage, people focus on making their partners happy. If you’re used to viewing being together as a test of the other person’s ability to take care of your needs, once you get married it’s hard to just switch that.”
ILLUS: Back in 1998 I read an intriguing article by a woman named Mary Roach wrote this in magazine “Health” (quoted in Digest12/98 p. 162ff) She wrote:
“I used to balk at the idea of life-long fidelity. But what did I gain for my freedom of living with a man for 13 years? The heart leaping off a cliff and flying through the air. And shortly thereafter, hitting the ground. Heart pulp. Guilt and regret. The knowledge that by refusing to commit myself to a relationship, I destroyed it.
Something I failed to grasp is that all marriages are group marriages. I am marrying a man; his delightful, beautiful children; his warm, welcoming parents, his sister, his cousins, their families. A whole clan of hearts and minds that wants me to sign on. What could be more wonderful. Would I belong if we simply lived together? Past experience says, not really.
To share a house with someone but not marry sends a message – to him, to our families, to everyone. It says, I love this man, but I’m not sure he is it. That’s a message I don’t wish to send anymore.
Of course, no marriage comes with guarantees. But you have to go into it believing… that this is it, for better and worse, for richer and poorer, liver spots and arthritis. If you do this, the what-ifs of divorce are moot.”
Now in the Bible God doesn’t use the term “living together”.
Actually, God calls it fornication, immorality, impurity.
And He doesn’t tell use statistics or personal testimonies to explain why it’s wrong.
He just tells us – don’t do that!
Don’t bow down at the altar of convenience!
Don’t substitute something that SOUNDS good for something that actually IS good!
God created us in His image.
He knows how we function.
He knows what will work for us.
And He knows what can help us, and what can hurt us.
So - for the Christian - God simply says: Do you trust Me?
Do you trust me?
Do you trust me enough to follow my commands.
Do you LOVE Me enough to honor marriage and keep it pure?
In Jeremiah 29:11 God declares
“I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
If we love God and trust Him enough to obey Him we don’t really need the statistics and personal testimonies (though they are nice to know). ALL we need is to understand is – when we obey God He blesses us.
DON’T ACCEPT SUBSTITUTES!
In Revelation 19 John almost accepted a substitute for the real thing.
And in marriage people often accept a substitute for the real thing
Don’t do it – it doesn’t work.
It doesn’t work on earth… and it won’t work in heaven.
CLOSE: At the close of the book of Revelation, there are a number of images that tells us there’s going to be a time of judgment for those who have accepted substitutes in their lives. But despite this time of judgment, there will be a grand wedding celebration for those of us who refused to settle for anything less than God’s best. We’ve been invited to exciting gathering of God’s people and nothing we’ve ever known will even begin to compare with what we’ll experience on that day.
But the question now for you…
Do you have an invitation?
Are you sure you’re going to get in the door?
OR have you accepted a substitute for doing things God’s way?
ILLUS: In his book 50 Days of Heaven Randy Alcorn (p. 23) tells of a friend of his:
Her name was Ruthanna Metzgar. She’s a professional singer and she was asked to sing at the wedding of a very wealthy man. The wedding reception was to be held on top 2 floors - Seattle’s tallest skyscraper Columbia Tower.
At the start of the reception, the bride and groom approached a beautiful glass and brass staircase that led to the top floor. Someone ceremoniously cut a satin ribbon draped across the bottom of the stairs and the bride and groom ascended, followed by their guests.
At the top of the stairs, outside the door to the great banquet room the maitre d’ stood holding a bound book.
“May I have your name please?” he asked
“I’m Ruthanna Metzgar and this is my husband Roy.”
He searched the M’s.
I’m not finding it. Would you spell it, please?”
She spelled her name slowly.
But after searching the book, the maitre d’ looked up and said,
“I’m sorry, but your name isn’t here.”
“There must be some mistake,” Ruthanna replied. “I’m the singer!”
The man answered, “It doesn’t matter who you are or what you did. Without your name in the book you cannot attend the banquet.”
He motioned to a waiter and said, “Show these people to the service elevator, please.”
The Metzgars followed the waiter past beautifully decorated tables laden with shrimp, whole smoked salmon, and magnificent carved ice sculptures. Adjacent to the banquet area, an orchestra was preparing to perform, the musician s all dressed in dazzling white tuxedos.
The waiter led Ruthanna and Roy to the service elevator ushered them in, and pressed G for the parking garage.
After driving several miles in silence, Roy reached over put his hand on his wife’s arm.
“Sweetheart, what happened?”
“When the invitation arrived, I was busy,” Ruthanna replied. “I never bothered to RSVP. Besides, I was the singer. Surely I could go to the reception without returning the RSVP!”
She started to weep – not only because she had missed the most lavish banquet she’d ever been invited to, but also because she suddenly had a small taste of what it will be like for people as they stand before Christ and find that their names are not written in the Lamb’s Book of Life.
In order to get into God’s banquet, very simple way to RSVP
BELIEVE: Believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of the living God (John 3:16)
REPENT: Acknowledge the fact that you are a sinner and need forgiveness (Acts 3:19)
CONFESS that Jesus will now be your Lord and Master (Romans 10:9-10)
BE BAPTIZED, buried in the waters and risen up to a new life (Romans 6:1-5)
There’s no substitute that will satisfy.
It doesn’t matter who you are, or what you’ve done, or who you know.
Don’t accept a substitute… make your decision to accept God’s best for your life.
