Open: Our lives are filled with a long train of clich¨¦s -- saying and expressions that are so familiar to us that we heard said so many times we can finish them before the person talking gets to the end of it. So we’re going to start off today with a pop quiz to see how many of these clich¨¦s you know by heart.
Many hands make .... light work
Don’t put off to tomorrow ..... what you can do today
Any friend of yours is.... a friend of mine
A chain is only as strong as ...its weakest link
Don’t throw the baby out with.... the bath water. ( I wonder if anyone ever actually did this?) "Oops I didn’t realize there was a baby in there!"
An apple a day .... keeps the doctor away. (that definitely originated from someone with an apple orchard.)
Be it ever so humble, there’s ...no place like home.
A bird in the hand is worth, .... two in the bush.
The more things change, the ....... more they stay the same.
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it ...... a thousand times.
Sometimes clich¨¦s express good common sense -- street wisdom if you will. But sometimes they are absolutely wrong. for example, if I said, "I wasn’t laughing at you, I was laughing .... with you"
Chances are that’s not really true. If you hear someone say this, chances are they’re just throwing a clich¨¦ out there trying to cover up what they are really doing. They are definitely laughing at you. And of course we’re all familiar with;
"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but ... words will never hurt me."
Is that true? Of course not. We know it’s wrong. It’s grade school wisdom that we used in defense of the mean bully in the school yard. He was mean spirited and foul mouthed but unfortunately, he was also bigger than us. So we used a little clich¨¦ to try to defuse the verbal assault we were enduring at the time. But inside we knew it wasn’t true. Word do hurt and when mean spirited people say mean things about us -- it not only hurts, but it often stays with a long time after the words have been spoken.
So most likely every one of us have had our mothers teach this age old proverb --
"If you can’t say something nice about someone then ....don’t say anything at all." I doubt there has ever been a mother or father that hasn’t said this about a thousand times to their children. In fact, I got a little video clip this past week in which a mom is teaching her child that exact thing.
(PLAY THUMPER VIDEO FROM YOU TUBE) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGt9jAkWie4
Learning how to manage the way we talk about others is a lesson we all need to learn early in life. But it’s a lesson that needs to be repeated over and over again as we grow because it seems that this is an area in which we all struggle from time to time. James is concerned about
What Are We Talking About?
What does slander mean? The dictionary defines it as: a malicious, false, and defamatory statement or report. It is an attack on the reputation of someone by publishing falsely and maliciously things that slander and injure. It’s untrue statement which damages someone’s character. Slander is actually against in the law in our culture. Society recognizes that your reputation is your stock and trade. Ill. in the very early and founding years of New York, those who slandered or defamed another person were apprehended and the punishment was to pierce through their tongue with a hot iron and then banish them from New York. Now that would act as a deterrent -- maybe.
Most translations say something like "do not speak evil against one another" They are trying to translation the Greek word ¦Ê¦Á¦Ó¦Á¦Ë¦Á¦Ë¦Åw "to speak down" "to talk down" to speak against -- it has the idea of evil speaking -- in some places in the Bible it is translated "backbiting" it the picture of biting someone in the back and they are not able to defend themselves. It is speaking of someone in a way that lowers that person’s reputation in the eyes of others. This isn’t an evaluation of a person’s actions -- it’s a condemnation. It’s a verdict without a deliberation. It’s not evaluation -- it condemnation.
Now what I want us to understand right from the beginning is that this a heart issue -- slanderous speech is symptomatic of a deeper issue. In Matthew 12:34, "Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks." what you speak in your mouth indicates your heart, a slanderous tongue, a habitually speaking evil of other people betrays an unchanged heart. Jesus once said, "For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander" (Matthew 15:19). Slander is viewed by Jesus as a serious sin. According to Jesus, the tongue is simply a neutral messenger boy that carries the words from the heart. It is the bucket that goes down to the well, dips into what is there and then dumps out of the mouth what it picks up. Slander is not just a sin of the tongue, but a sin that is deep in our hearts. -- So we need to keep that in mind as we explore this topic this morning. The end result cannot be a decision to control my tongue, right?
If I kept bringing polluted water out of a well every time I sent a bucket down, it wouldn’t be logical to respond to that by saying, "Well I guess I better get a different bucket." That would be lunacy, right? You have to treat the water that’s in the well if you want to get something healthy out of it. We’re not here today to learn how to control our tongues, but to experience something new in our hearts. A person who continually speaks evil against another person is really not dealing with a tongue issue, they’re dealing with a heart issue, right? So a pure heart and a renewed mind and the love of God shut this sin off.
Understand the Damage that Occurs When People Chose to Slander Others.
It’s so hard, Lord, to control the tongue all the time. It is a restless, restless member with great potential for evil. It can set the whole world on fire, James said in chapter 3. And indeed we have seen it do that.
* To others -- We saw that in the video. One word can change the trajectory of a person’s life if it settles into their heart. How do you reestablish a person’s reputation after you torn it down with unwarranted criticism? Matthew 26:59, "The chief priests, the elders, all the councils sought false witnesses against Jesus to put Him to death." They went out and found malicious liars but they found none, yea though many false witnesses came, they found none. At last came two false witnesses and said this fellow said I am able to destroy the temple of God and to build it in three days. In other words, the whole execution of Jesus Christ was predicated on the fact that some people lied. They lied about the intent of the words of our Lord.
* To ourselves -- the damage a critical spirit has on us.
Most of the time we don’t even see the seriousness of a critical spirit until it has taken a toll on our spiritual lives and robbed us of our peace. We begin to realize that something is completely out of whack in our lives, but we can’t always put a finger on what it is. Different things may lead to a critical spirit. It may be caused by external things around us or it may come from internal thoughts and motives. James’ readers had fallen into the habit of criticizing one another and in verse 11 James says, "Stop speaking against one another." He crushes any right his readers may have claimed to sit in judgment over others. He rules out the harsh, unkind critical spirit that continually finds fault with others.
* To the mission of the church.
James is calling his people to deal with this was for a very important reason... to avoid giving the church an ugly reputation among the community at large. Because very seldom will an internal disruption stay internal. The church is designed to exist in an atmosphere of peace. You don’t have to look very far to find where this sort of activity has seriously damaged a church. All of us have heard or seen of churches that have split over secret meetings and dangerous accusations. Where a faction of a church has gotten power hungry. Where pastors have left because a group of people were so critical that he could no longer endure.
It Undermines Our Mandate To Love Others Unconditionally.
Brothers, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against his brother or judges him speaks against the law and judges it. (James 4:11)
James uses the word brothers to create impact with his readers. What he is saying is this; I just am reminding you of your relationship to each other. You’re going to get a grip on this sin of slander and malicious gossip when you think properly about each other. And what he is saying here is, you are all...what?...brothers, in the family. How can you say this of each other? He’s writing to an assembly of people who are linked in common life. Some are true believers, some are not. But they’re all linked in common life. They’re all a family. malicious lying against another in the family is unexpected, it’s absolutely unacceptable. You don’t do that in a brotherhood. You don’t do that among family, you protect each other. We might expect that from people on the outside. But not on the inside.
What law is he talking about? Well, if you look back at James 2:8 you see James referring to what he calls "The Royal Law" What’s the royal law? "Love your neighbor as yourself" - the Royal law "Love your neighbor as yourself" is a good law for you to be under, right? Agape your neighbor as you would agape yourself. Love you neighbor unconditionally as you love yourself unconditionally. Ill: How many you remember reading advice columns in the newspapers: (Dear Abby, Ann Landers, Heloise - I wonder why there was never a man who gave advice?) How often do we make judgments as though we were God when we have little or no understanding of people’s motives or circumstances. A grocery store clerk once wrote to Ann Landers to complain about the people buying luxury food items with food stamps. She said these people were lazy and wasteful. In a later column, Landers printed the response of a woman who wrote in answer to the judgmental grocery clerk. "I’m the woman who bought the $17 cake and paid for it with food stamps. I thought the check-out woman in the store would burn a hole through me with her eyes. What she didn’t know is the cake was for my little girl’s birthday. It will be her last. She has bone cancer and will probably be gone within six to eight months." Beloved, we need to be careful about developing a harsh and judgmental spirit. We have no right to appoint ourselves as judges over others. We cannot see the hearts of others.
"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?" (Matthew 7:1-3)
People who are humble don’t worry about judging others. I don’t know about you but I’ve got so many problems of my own, I don’t have time to take on extra cases. I got enough being occupied dealing with Pastor Tim -- I don’t need to judge anyone else. My dance card if already filled, thank you very much. Psalm 105:1 says, Whoever slanders his neighbor in secret, him will I put to silence; I don’t know exactly what that means -- but I don’t want to find out either.
It Reveals Our Choice To Rebel Against God’s Law
When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it. (James 4:11b)
James has just said to his congregation, God gives grace to the humble -- but when you slander your brother and sisters in Christ -- it’s not humility you are practicing. You are not practicing submission and putting yourself under the Lordship of Jesus -- what you are doing is judging God’s standard as either not valid or at least not applicable to you and then doing what ever you want to do. You’re exercising your discernment and determining that God’s law shouldn’t apply in your situation.
When you break the law on a regular basis, what are you saying? You’re saying that the law doesn’t pertain to you, right? For example, in some churches (so I’ve been told) there are people who habitually break the speed limit. When you break the speed limit on a regular basis, what are you doing? You are looking at a law that says 55mph and saying "Well that’s a good law for some people, but not necessarily for me. I’ve got driving skills that some other people don’t have." "It’s a good law for grandma and the new driver, but I don’t need those kind of restrictions on my life." You’re not submitting to the law -- you’re sitting in judgment over it. You’re not placing yourself under its authority -- you are establishing yourself as an authority that is higher than the authority of the law.
You see I think that this is a very popular way of looking at God’s law today. We come to Scripture and we say, "Well, does God really mean don’t slander anyone? I mean he certainly understands that I’m just really talking about this person, because they have hurt me so deeply or done something that’s so bad to me -- it doesn’t really apply to this situation because what they’ve done is sooo egregious." or I’m not slandering this person -- I’m just sharing my concern with someone else. or I’m not slandering someone I’m just sharing a prayer request.
What James is saying is the unimaginable reality is that the one who disregards the law of God in his behavior is himself affirming that he is above that law...that he doesn’t have to be bound by that law, that he is living on a plain higher than the law of God and not subject to its authority. By this is what happens every time we sin. You have to put sin in its context. You have to see it for what it is. You’re saying the law of God is unworthy of my attention, it is unworthy of my affection, it is unworthy of my obedience, it is unworthy of my submission. sin is in effect saying I am superior to the law of God. I am not under His law. I am not bound to His law. God can’t tell me what to do. I’m in charge. That’s what sin says.
It Dishonors God as the Only True and Righteous Judge
There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. (James 4:12)
James is pointing out to his people -- they were not only judging the law of God they were judging God himself. This is just a logical progression here. When the slanderer puts himself above the law, he takes the bench and he endeavors to dispossess God.
- Exactly what satan did: Satan said "I will be like God, I will be like the Most High," five times he said "I will, I will, I will, I will, I will." And he sought the place of supremacy. He sought to come out from under the submission that was his under God and to be above God and be in charge. And that’s been the essence of every sin ever since. ILL: Back in October of 2000, an interesting baseball game took place in Cuba. During an exhibition game against Venezuela, 74 year old dictator Fidel Castro grabbed an aluminum bat and walked to the plate. When Castro approached the batters box, Hugo Chavez, the President of Venezuela came to the mound to pitch. After five pitches the two heads of state were locked in a full count. Castro watched as the 3-2 pitched sailed through the middle of the strike zone and listened as the umpire called him out. "No" Castro said, "that was a ball." He proceeded to walk to first base. No one argued. President Chavez said nothing. The opposing team said nothing. The umpire said nothing. Later Castro joked about President Chavez saying, "Today just wasn’t his day." The law of baseball says that when a pitch goes over the middle of plate in the strike zone on a 3-2 count the batter is out. Castro placed himself above the laws of baseball and made up his own rules. That is exactly what we do when we judge a brother. God’s law tells us not to do it. But we set ourselves above the laws of God and make up our own rules. We judge the law. James reminds his readers who God is -- He is the one who is able to save and destroy. He is lawgiver. He is judge. He is Savior. He is executioner. Now there are those who will reject that completely; for example:
Afterward Moses and Aaron went to Pharaoh and said, "This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: ’Let my people go, so that they may hold a festival to me in the desert.’" Pharaoh said, "Who is the LORD, that I should obey him and let Israel go? I do not know the LORD and I will not let Israel go." (Exodus 5:1-2) He said what every sinner says. I’m in charge, there’s no Lord above me, I’ll do what I want. It’s what we say every time we choose to disobey or ignore the pattern of life and behavior given for us in the Bible. "Obey God? Who is God that He should determine what I do? I do what I want and I certainly don’t need any restrictions or guidance from him."
It Exposes An Irrational, Inflated View of Self
There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you--who are you to judge your neighbor? (James 4:12)
Not only that -- but look at the rest of the verse -- "Who are you to judge your neighbor?" You can look at another fellow brother or sister in the family of God and somehow you can place yourself somehow above them - in a position of superiority? What makes you think you are superior to them? What makes you think you can criticize someone else? - What’s the answer to that question? The answer is we do this because internally we truly believe that we are better than some people. We think we’re more intelligent that others because we’ve read a few more books. We think we are more successful because we have more money. What quality is it that allows one person to speak negatively about another person?
So James is saying, "Who are you to establish yourself as a critic or a judge?" This is a statement about perspective. There is this one being -- uncreated, all-powerful, all-wise, omni-present -- who spoke by the power of his word so many billions of stars and planets into existence that we’ve still not been able to count them all. With the Hubble telescope we turn from one area to the next and we discover some new uncharted area of space and just about all we can do is say, "Wow, Would you look at that!" -- there is this one all mighty being who created this tiny little world called earth that just kind of hangs in space because he chooses to sustain here by his own benevolence -- and down on small tiny little blue marble there are about 6 billion tiny little confused beings called people -- now these tine little confused beings called people are born in way in which they know nothing, they can’t feed themselves or clean up after themselves or do anything beside cry and make a mess. That’s all they can do. And they have a very limited lifespan, they have an extremely limited perspective on the reality of creation, they have a limited capacity in their ability to comprehend their reality and they have very little power to accomplish anything great. So there is this One Great Almighty Being who watches over these tiny little beings because of His love for them and he gives them laws and standards to live by so that they might draw close to Him and know Him and get to be blessed by Him for all Eternity and they (these tiny little beings) look at the rules that he has instituted and says, "It doesn’t pertain to me!" He looks down at these tiny little beings and he says, at the end of verse 12, "Who are you to judge?" "You’re questioning one of God’s commands? Why do you think that you have the right or the freedom to question what God has spoken? You have to put sin in its context. You have to see it for what it is. You’re saying the law of God is unworthy of my attention, it is unworthy of my affection, it is unworthy of my obedience, it is unworthy of my submission
Listen I know we live in a country where the highest value we embrace is freedom of speech -- but that’s a secular standard that flows out of living in a secular pluralistic society. It’s not a biblical value. That’s a cultural norm, not a biblical norm. In case you haven’t discovered it yet, the first amendment is not part of the Bible. But even the right to free speech doesn’t mean you can go around and just say anything and everything you want with complete abandon. James is looking at his people and he’s saying, "Why are you even talking? Who are you and why do you think your opinion is so great?" There’s is this eternal God who has had this plan from eternity past and some place along the timeline of eternity there is this little dot on the line where he makes the world and sometime during the short little line of the existence of the world is this tiny little dot of where you exist and instead of placing yourself under the alignment of His comprehensive authority -- you come along and speak up and say, "I have another way of doing things." You’re going to judge what this eternal God has put in place- this one who knows the end from the beginning and causes his ordained will to come about no matter what -- but you -- who are you? Have you ever stopped and asked yourself this question, "Who am I that I throw my opinion out there so freely? Like I’ve got the ability to judge God’s law and commands instead of being quiet and submitting to them?"
So How Do We Respond To These Verses?
Think Before You Open Your Mouth To Criticize Someone Else.
ILL: Before you start criticizing someone else, filter your comments through this little acronym:
T.H.I.N.K.
T -- is it true? H - is it helpful? I - is it inspiring? N -- is it necessary? K -- is it kind?
If you answer no to any of those questions, chances are what you want to say doesn’t need to be said.
* Don’t Use A Computer To Deal With Interpersonal Issues.
Don’t use email, Facebook, myspace, yourspace or anyone else’s space. The propensity for misunderstanding is just too high. When people write emails -- for whatever reason -- they often feel much freeer to use inflammatory language than when they are with a person face to face. They often become much more critical than they would be if they were standing in front of a person. There is far too much opportunity to misunderstand a person’s intent or emotional state or the words they use and then the person reading has an emotional reaction to their interpretation to what they think the other person meant when they wrote it. The possibility to misunderstand one another sky rockets. -- We choose email because it’s easier to type in front of a computer instead of making a trip and sitting down over a cup of coffee. But that’s the way the church has been handling problems for the past 2000 years. We are called by the Bible to meet face to face not on Facebook. -- Whether you choose to follow this advice or not -- never, never, never, never, -- be critical of another person in an email. If you feel you must confront them about an issue -- go to them in person and give them an opportunity to address your concerns face to face. Critical Email is like a sniper shooting at you from a distance. You don’t even get the chance to respond to the assault. Computerized criticism is the low road -- make the choice to live on the high road. A believer is called to a higher standard. If you have a question or a concern -- talk to the person personally. If you really want to take shots at someone -- start shooting at satan who most likely the one who has put the critical spirit in your heart in the first place. (Eph 4:29) Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
* Don’t Attempt To Enlist A Substitute Critic When Dealing With Interpersonal Issues.
Sometimes another device we employ is when we have a problem with something someone has said, or done the first thing we do is go running to another person and spill our criticism all over them. Now why do we do that? Because we want them to agree with our criticism -- so that they in turn will first agree with our criticism of the other person and hopefully get involved and deal with the offending person on our behalf. It’s a form of surrogate complaining. You plant your seed of criticism in the heart of someone else and allow it to grow. They become a surrogate to nurture your complaint. Jesus has given us specific instructions on how to respond to a perceived offense."Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift." (Matthew 5: 23-24) Any violation to step outside of this is a decision you are making to judge the law, right? Both you and the surrogate become lawbreakers.
* Ask The Lord To Change A Critic’s Heart To A Heart of Humility and Love.
Slander is not just a sin of the tongue, but a sin that is deep in our hearts. It is vital that you and I learn to say, "I have a slandering heart. And the reason I have a slandering heart is because I have a judging heart. And the reason I have a judging heart is because I am a fragile person. I desperately need to protect myself. I desperately need acceptance and love. Slander is a wonderful offensive weapon I use to protect myself."
The person who slanders is an insecure person. By putting people down he is then able to bring himself up in the eyes of others. Slander is part of a very intricate strategy that feeds our deep desire to be approved and accepted by our listeners, and to somehow be better than the person we are slandering. To slander someone, you must first imagine yourself as superior to him. You must view yourself as qualified to be a critic--only then you can put him down. But sooner or later it backfires. People who slander are destined to be empty, shallow people. They are people who really don’t know the power or the presence of God in their lives. So what is the antidote to slander? It is the gospel. Stop looking to man and look to Christ alone for approval and acceptance. The more you discover that your security and significance is in Christ, the more your problem with slander will diminish.
If you ground your life in the truths of the gospel, and that in Christ you are completely and totally accepted by the only one who really counts, then, when you discover certain faults in someone or when someone has hurt you, instead of falling back into your old patterns of judgment and slander, you will be able to just allow the Lord to take control of the situation and leave it in His hands. Instead of being a critic -- you will actually start to love that person. The Psalmist says in Psalm 141:3-4 "Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips. Let not my heart be drawn to what is evil, to take part in wicked deeds with men who are evildoers; let me not eat of their delicacies."
CLOSE: Make that your prayer this week. The good news is that Jesus promises a new and clean heart to all those who will turn from their sin and trust in him. When Christ controls the heart, he controls the tongue.
