“Love Lessons”
September 2, 2012
1 Corinthians 12:31-13:1-3
“So you should earnestly desire the most helpful gifts. But now let me show you a way of life that is best of all.
If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.”
Every Christian, I suppose, knows that love is what makes our religion different from the other world religions. The best known and most loved Scripture in the Bible is John 3:16.
“For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.”
(John 3:16)
God loved! The Scripture says that God IS love. The epitome of God; the essence of God – is love. Buddha, his followers think, is wise. Islam has their five pillars of faith and believes there is no God but Allah and Muhammad is his messenger. If you are not a believer in Allah you are an infidel and an enemy. Confucius, Hinduism, and all the other world religions have no God of love; no God that died for them. But Christians worship a God of love; who IS love; and loves us so much He died for us.
Our King and Savior left us with really only one command.
“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” John 13:34-35 (LB)
So the “proof of the puddin’” is the way we love one another. The ‘test’ of our spirituality is by the way we love. The walk of the talk is by the way we treat others. And yet I am convinced that so many Christians don’t really know HOW to love. The world has taught us a selfish, weak, mushy thing we call love - but it really isn’t. Either we don’t have a true understanding of love or we really aren’t Jesus’ disciples – because Jesus said “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”
I think it is the former – we don’t have a biblical understanding of love. Someone sang, “what the world needs now is love, sweet love” - and it does. But what IS love? This morning I want us to examine, once again, this old concept; this old truth; this old command – to love. But before I do that, let me establish once again, that this IS a command. It is not an option. We are commanded to love.
“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other...”
John 13:34
“You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that.”
Matthew 5:43-47
“If we love our Christian brothers and sisters, it proves that we have passed from death to life. But a person who has no love is still dead. Anyone who hates another brother or sister is really a murderer at heart. And you know that murderers don’t have eternal life within them.
We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us. So we also ought to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters. If someone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need but shows no compassion—how can God’s love be in that person?
Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions.” 1 John 3:14-18
Love is not an option – it is essential for the Christian. If we say we are a Christian – we need to prove it by the way we love.
But the problem is not so much knowing that we have to love – but knowing what real love is. We have been told by people they loved us – and then they deserted us. We have been told we are loved – and then hurt by the very ones who said that. We have been told we are loved – then ignored.
I know one dad who knows his daughter is dying to hear the phrase “I love you from his lips” and he doesn’t say it. The Bible says,
“It is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it.” James 4:17
That dad provides for her, spends money on her, does things to show his love – but he will not, for whatever reasons, SAY “I love you” to her. She weeps broken hearted – longing to hear those sweet words. He says, “She knows I love her!” But there is a need to HEAR IT! It is a sin to know what you ought to do – and then not do it. Why wouldn’t someone tell his or her child they love them? Is it because it makes them feel vulnerable or they feel it is a weakness and they care more about their own feelings than they do the one they are suppose to love? If that’s it – it sure isn’t the way Jesus loves. We need to SAY it.
So what is love? I guess the answer to that depends on who you ask.
The dictionary defines it: 1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
The Bible defines it: “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Intellectually, we can grasp this concept – but putting it into practice is a whole different ballgame. I think the reason is because this is a spiritual concept and it can only be fully met through power of the Holy Spirit. We can only love as we ought to love as we are following and empowered by the Holy Spirit. We do not have the will power on our own. We do not have the self control in our own strength. We do not have the wisdom naturally to love as we ought to love. And even filled with the Holy Spirit - it takes much self sacrifice. It isn’t easy to love! Oh, sure when we are well fed, well rested, and prayed up it isn’t so hard – but when we are tired and hungry or things aren’t going our way – WATCH OUT! If people disagree with us or don’t do things as we would like – WATCH OUT!
Even if we don’t yell and scream, we say negative and hurtful things and are anything but loving. We need to work on our spiritual growth in this area.
So let me suggest a few things – or rather let’s look at what the Bible says about this. I think Jesus probably gave us the simplest and best expression of love in His first sermon. He said,
“Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.” Matthew 7:12
I want people to give me the benefit of the doubt. I want people to be patient with me. I want people to be kind and nice to me – even when I don’t deserve it. I want people to be gentle with me. When I am wrong I want them to gently correct me.
Don’t you want people to treat you that way? Then you must treat THEM that way. “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you.” I think this is a spiritual law. I think people are going to treat you pretty much the way you treat them. I think if you want people to be kind and generous and patient with you – you need to sow the seeds of that fruit first.
Don’t forget that Jesus said if we only love those who love us – we are no different from unbelievers. We can be pretty kind and gentle when people are kind and gentle with us. That isn’t the mark of a Christian. The Christian is kind and gentle EVEN when others aren’t treating HIM that way. The Bible says,
“A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.”
Proverbs 15:1
To live as Christ lived – you must learn to control your emotions. When people are being harsh and tempers are flaring – YOU need to answer gently. And often it is not so much WHAT you say – as HOW you say it. You can say just exactly the right words – but with your tone, your inflection, your laugh – you can cut that person to the bone. You can smash someone in the face – without ever raising your fist; you can leave someone a quivering pool of jelly – just by the words you say or the tone you use. We need to stop doing that.
Living the life of love is sometimes like walking a tightrope. We need to correct; we need to speak the truth – and often we go in swinging and let the chips fall where they may. The Bible says,
“Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil.”
Ephesians 4:26-27
Anger is a dangerous emotion. Very seldom is it justified. Very seldom is it godly. I suppose if we seeing someone abused – we ought to get angry. I suppose if we see someone being exploited - we ought to get angry. But even then – we need to be very careful – anger gives a foothold to the devil. And especially don’t let anger control you. That is sin. If we do allow ourselves to get angry if ought to be motivation to do good. Otherwise – control it.
The Christian way is a social way. Christians were made to need each other. The Bible says,
“And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.
Hebrews 10:25
Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.” Ecc 4:9-12
Since we are made for relationships – problems will arise. Differences will arise. And we need to correct each other. The Word says,
“Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself. Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.” Galatians 6:1-2
We need to correct each other – but remember it must always be gently, humbly, lovingly. And remember, if you have not yet obtained perfection of acts – you will probably err and someone will correct you. So do this as you would want it to be done to you, too.
LOVE – it is what the world needs now, isn’t it. It is what YOU need. It is what I need. We need love. We have a basic need for it. We need to receive it – but we also need to give it. Another great need is to learn how to truly love. We can talk it – but we need to walk it. I am convinced that Christians today have been taught the wrong kind of love. The example of so many Christians of yesteryear have been wrong. We saw a love that was harsh; we saw a holiness that was hard; we accepted as fact the actions of older believers who yelled and screamed to get their own way. We experienced our role models hurting and harming and injuring without swearing or cussing – maybe without raising their voice – so we accepted it a ‘biblical’. But it wasn’t – and isn’t. Love is patient. Love is kind. Love does no harm.
I think our need is to always put ourselves in the other persons place and see how our words would feel if they were directed at ourselves. “Do to others as you would want them do to you.” That’s golden!
Well, those are a few lessons on love. May people know we are Christians by the way we love one another.
