In the book, The Three Edwards, Thomas Costain described the life of Raynald III, a 14-century duke in what is now Belgium. Grossly overweight, Raynald was commonly called by his Latin nickname, Crassus, which means "fat."
After a violent quarrel, Raynald's younger brother Edward led a successful revolt against him. Edward captured Raynald but did not kill him. Instead, he built a room around Raynald in the Nieuwkerk castle and promised him he could regain his title and property as soon as he was able to leave the room.
This would not have been difficult for most people since the room had several windows and a door of near-normal size, and none was locked or barred. The problem was Raynald's size. To regain his freedom, he needed to lose weight. But Edward knew his older brother, and each day he sent a variety of delicious foods. Instead of dieting his way out of prison, Raynald grew fatter.
When Duke Edward was accused of cruelty, he had a ready answer: "My brother is not a prisoner. He may leave when he so wills." Raynald stayed in that room for ten years and wasn't released until after Edward died in battle. By then his health was so ruined he died within a year… a prisoner of his own appetite.
The lack of self-control is the failure to exercise restraint over our own impulses, emotions, or desires.
• There are many who are prisoners of their own impulses - whether it is lust, drinking, anger, ambition, greed, spending, or any kind of addictions (it can come in any forms) – but anything that’s uncontrolled and feeds on our desires will one day destroy us.
• Raynald was not locked in, physically speaking. He was locked in by his unrestrained cravings. He could have fasted his way out of his own prison and found true freedom.
• Prov 25:28 “Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control.” He lost his defence against the forces that comes against him. He has no means to resist them.
A person with no self-restraint is vulnerable.
• It is like a smoker getting the cigarette packs with gruesome pictures of the horrific consequences of smoking, and yet not being deterred by them.
• The mind may tell them something, but they are unable to obey the signal. He is smoking himself to a slow death. You see, knowledge alone cannot change a man’s life. He needs something more – self-control.
Self-control is greatly needed today.
• When it is your turn to do the dishes and you end up lying on the couch watching TV, that’s a lack of self-control.
• When the pornographic ad pops up on your computer and you choose not to close it, that’s a lack of self-control.
• When it is getting late and you know that you need to be at your best at school the next day, and you’re still on your computer game, that’s a lack of self-control.
• When you love to walk the malls every day and buys things you do not need, that’s a lack of self-control.
James 4:17 “Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins.”
• There things we know we need to do but we are not doing them. We let our impulses, emotions, or desires rule us.
• It is more than self-help we need. It is more than self-effort. It is more than self-discipline (although this is good).
• We need external help. We need God’s help. We need the help of the Holy Spirit to not gratify the desires of our sinful nature. Self-control is a Fruit of the Spirit.
Titus 2:11-14 “For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope - the glorious appearing of our great God and Saviour, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good.”
• The context is important. Titus was ministering in a difficult environment in Crete.
• Crete was known for its clubbing and promiscuity, where sex, drugs and drinking abounds. Paul mentioned it in 1:12 "Cretans are always liars, evil brutes, lazy gluttons."
Surrounded by such temptations, Paul needed to write this brief letter to Titus and caution the church to stay vigilant and pure. Listen to what he says.
1:7-8 Since an overseer is entrusted with God's work, he must be blameless - not overbearing, not quick-tempered, not given to drunkenness, not violent, not pursuing dishonest gain. 8 Rather he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined.
2:1-8 You must teach what is in accord with sound doctrine. 2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
6 Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. 7 In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness 8 and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.
How are we going to get self-control? The final verses in chapter 2 give us the solution to out-of-control lives – Titus 2:11-14.
• “For the grace of God… teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age…” while we wait for Christ’s return.
(1) Acknowledge our Need … of God’s grace.
It has little to do with the temptations or the difficult circumstances you’re in.
• It has to do with your willingness to trust Christ for the strength to do things right.
• If you are struggling with some form of addictions – lust, anger, greed, or spending - then the first thing you need to do is to confess to God your need of His help.
• Self-control is not ruling ourselves, but allowing ourselves to be ruled by Christ. For it is the GRACE of God that will enable you to say NO to these passions.
The biblical understanding of self-control is not me controlling myself.
• Being a Fruit of the Spirit, it is the control of self by the empowering of the Holy Spirit. It is “self in control by the Spirit of God”.
• This was what Paul was talking about in Gal 5 when he ended up with the Fruit of the Spirit. He says “Walk by the Spirit” (Gal 5:16) [NIV: “Live by the Spirit”] and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature.
Self control is being able to say NO and YES. It is saying NO to ungodliness and world passions; and YES to self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age.
• The Holy Spirit will enable us to (1) stop doing wrong things, and (2) to keep us going in doing the right things. Titus 2:14 “eager to do what is good!”
• It’s not enough to try hard. In fact, you cannot succeed by trying harder. And don’t pretend that it is not there.
Self-control begins when you acknowledge that you cannot and that you desperately need God’s grace and His help.
• In other words, we can, if we allow Him to. It is about submission to God. James 4:7 “Submit, then, yourselves to God.”
• It is acknowledging that He is there to make it possible.
The power is always available, but sadly it is not always applied.
• It is not easy or natural for many to admit that they need help. Some pretend that they’re all right. They sees it a shameful thing to seek help.
• But we need to, if you really want to do the right thing, the godly thing.
To help alcoholics recover from their drinking addiction, there is a group called Alcoholics Anonymous came up with a Twelve-Step program that was so successful that it has now become a standard guidelines for recovery from all kinds of addiction, compulsion or behavioral problems.
1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
(2) Watch and Pray
Pray like Jesus in the Garden, and the angel will come by you.
Jesus gives this advice for those in difficult, tempting situations - Luke 21:34-36 when He was talking about the last days:
34 "Be careful, or your hearts will be weighed down with dissipation, drunkenness and the anxieties of life, and that day will close on you unexpectedly like a trap. 35 For it will come upon all those who live on the face of the whole earth. 36 Be always on the watch, and pray that you may be able to escape all that is about to happen, and that you may be able to stand before the Son of Man."
In the Garden of Gethsemane - Mark 14:38
38 Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak."
This is the quickest way to bring God back into focus.
Satan’s attempt is to disrupt that communication line we have with God and to distract us from the things of God. “The longer you stay away from Him, the much better.”
• When we pray, we open the latch to the flow of the power of the Holy Spirit, “who works in us to will and to act according to His good purpose” (Phil 2:13).
Luke 22:39-43 39 Jesus went out as usual to the Mount of Olives, and his disciples followed him. 40 On reaching the place, he said to them, "Pray that you will not fall into temptation." 41 He withdrew about a stone's throw beyond them, knelt down and prayed, 42 "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done." 43 An angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him.
• God sent an angel to strengthen Jesus! That is what we can expect when we pray.
CONCLUSION
This concludes the Fruit of the Spirit series. God is concerned about our character, more than our capabilities or competence. He wants us to grow to be like Christ, his Son.
Therefore, the Fruit of the Spirit is very important in the Christian life.
(1) The Fruit of the Spirit has to do with God’s eternal purposes for us.
• That’s His concern and His purpose for you and me today.
• Paul says to Timothy: “Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.” (1 Tim 4:16)
(2) The Fruit of the Spirit is the necessary evidence of God’s work in us.
• It makes visible the invisible work of God within us.
• We are the light of the world. Pastor Chip Ingram says light makes no sound; it is to be seen. We model the new life for the world; the God-given life, the abundant life, the eternal life.
• People may not be convinced by the words we say, but they can be convinced by our changed lives, which they can see.
Stay close to Christ. Robert Solomon, in The Virtuous Life, pp.202-03:
“The fruit of the Spirit has to do with our continuing relationship with Jesus Christ. … No one can hope to become virtuous without relating closely with Christ. And no one can be close to Christ and not become a virtuous person. The relationship produces the virtue, for to know Christ is to become like Him.”
PRAY:
Lord, we want to consecrate ourselves anew to You today. May we grow to be like You, Jesus. Let us excel in every virtue – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Let the Fruit of the Spirit be our distinctive mark. May our conduct exemplify your character and draw people to imitate our purity of life. May we remain steadfast and strong, faithful and obedient to you, in every circumstance of life. Let us be the light that truly shines. Glorify yourself through us. We ask this, in Jesus’ Name, AMEN!
