THE MISUNDERSTOOD GOD: THE LIST-KEEPING GOD
1 CORINTHIANS 13:1-5
Big Idea: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you (Ephesians 4:32).
Supporting Scripture:
• Reading from the Old Testament: Jeremiah 33:1-9
• Reading from the Psalms: Psalm 30
• Reading from the Epistles: Rev. 5:11-14
• Reading from the Gospels: Matthew 18:15-35
SERIES RECAP:
It is interesting to me how the world has turned so many of the love’s traits from 1 Corinthians 13 on their head. We can justify about anything from impatience to rudeness, from jealousy to anger and still call it “love.” If we are not careful we will, in the process, attribute to God a character that is worldly and carnal. That, of course, is something none of us would ever do intentionally but may happen if we misunderstand God’s love and hence, God Himself.
• If we fail to understand that love is patient and kind then we may think God is a Hair Trigger God
• If we fail to understand that love does not envy then we may think God is an “It’s all about me!” God
• If we fail to understand that love does not boast and is not proud then we may think God is a Rock Star God
• If we fail to understand that love is is not rude and self-seeking then we may think God is a needy/clingy God
Listen as I read to you from 1 Corinthians 13:1-5.
1 CORINTHIANS 13:1-5
1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
4 Love … 5 is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
INTRO
As we look at “4 Love … 5 is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”
We can see easily how provoking someone and keeping lists (holding grudges) feed off of each other.
“Grudges”
One day a visitor leaned on the old fence around a farm while he watched an old farmer plowing with an old mule. After a while, the visitor said, "I don’t like to tell you how to run your business, but you could save yourself a lot of work by saying, ’Gee’ and ’Haw’ to that mule instead of just tugging on those reins." The old farmer pulled a big handkerchief from his pocket and wiped his face. Then he said, "Reckon you’re right, but this animal kicked me five years ago and I haven’t spoke to him since."
Sometimes grudges are about that silly and about that productive aren’t they?
Humans are skilled at finding ways to do things that irritate each other (“provoking”) and hold grudges while still calling it “love.”
• A wife burns her husband’s food because he did not meet her expectations or consistently reminds him of past times he has failed.
o God’s love is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
• A husband gives his wife the silent treatment because she did not meet his expectations or harbors resentment from events long in the past.
o God’s love is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
He held a grudge for 57 years!
USA Today ran the story of Carl Ericcson who at age 73 killed another man over a single incident in during high school, some 57 years earlier. The victim had put a jock strap in Ericcson’s head and Ericcson just bided his time until he got the chance to kill him for it. (source: http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/nation/story/2012-06-15/man-sentenced-grudge-killing/55631100/1)
• God’s love is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
I am not sure how we pull it off but I have discovered that many Christians also think God keeps a record of wrongs; that he is a fault-finder, that he harbors grudges. To be certain, God does indeed require confession and repentance from sin but let’s be clear; God does not want you revisiting your indiscretion over and over. To be clear God does not keep a list of your sins until you enter a confessional to rehearse and catalogue them one by one, or until you light the correct number of candles or until you have done enough good things.
God does not hold grudges. And God does not bring up your past to reinforce his opinions or remind you of your failures and need for him. God does not have a passive-aggressive personality disorder.
In a similar vein, we seem to have come to the opinion that underneath the grace-full exterior that God is has a smoldering anger. We think that, secretly, God is mad at us and that his anger is easily provoked/rekindled toward us. But nothing could be further from the truth. You cannot “push God’s buttons.” God is a model of self-control. You need not fear that God is “going to fly off the handle” in a fit of rage. God is amazingly stable. God does not need to attend an anger management class.
This is the cracked lens by which we view God today. But be of good cheer – the Gospel and 1 Corinthians 13 offers “Good News” about the character and disposition of God.
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What I would like to do this morning is leave you with a few observations about how the world sees love (as it relates to provoking each other and holding grudges) and how God’s love can change how we treat each other (not to mention that it can change how we think God treats us).
1) NURTURING ANGER AND NURSING GRUDGES FAILS TO ALLOW HURTS TO HEAL. GOD’S LOVE FORGIVES.
Proverbs 10:12 says, “Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs.”
In our broken world we try to control events and people so as to insulate ourselves from pain. One of the ways we do this is by holding people accountable for their sin long after the grievance has past the statute of limitations. We harbor the memory, and the emotions it provokes, in an attempt to not let “that” happen to us again.
But there really is only one way to move past the pain – that is to put the past in the past – to forgive.
Downton Abbey
In the British hit, “Downton Abbey” there is a storyline where one of the heirs to the abbey, Mary Crawley, is engaged to be married to a newspaper tycoon named Sir Richard Carlisle. Carlisle was able to secure the engagement by discovering an egregious indiscretion in Mary’s past and threatening to expose it if she did not marry him. Carlisle is rude, cruel and sometimes mean; but Mary cannot break off the engagement. Finally she gets the nerve when she discovers her family will forgive the indiscretion (they will not keep “a record of wrongs”).
As she breaks it off, with a stern look Carlisle says, “I really did love you.”
Carlisle had maneuvered and manipulated love into such a creature that he could keep a record of wrongs, provoke Mary time and again, and still see himself as “loving” since he was not exposing her sin. Sadly, we too can be rather adept at such a maneuver but in the doing – we fail to allow hurts and wounds to heal.
1) Nurturing anger and nursing grudges fails to allow hurts to heal. God’s love forgives.
2) NURTURING ANGER AND NURSING GRUDGES HINDERS INTIMACY. GOD’S LOVE SEES A “YOU” THAT OTHERS DO NOT AND THUS INVITES INTIMACY.
1 Peter 4:8 gives us insight into how to nurture intimacy, “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”
“I Can Never Be Done With You”
There is a show on the SyFy channel that Vickie and I watch called “Eureka.” It is about a sheriff in a town of geniuses. The Sheriff is always working through comedic catastrophes that the geniuses have induced with their experiments. But the biggest dilemma the sheriff often faces is his daughter, Zoe, who is a bit of a delinquent because she has been starved for love since her mom and dad divorced.
In one episode Sheriff Carter has about reached his breaking point when Zoe steals someone’s identity and uses their credit card. In the scene Zoe says, “I thought that was it. I thought you were done with me.” Sheriff Carter’s response changes Zoe and his relationship through the rest of the series. It becomes the turning point for her character. He says, “Zoe, you are my daughter. I could never be ‘done’ with you.”
In a real way, God is never “done” with you. He loves you with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3) that is renewed daily. His love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8).
He longs to be in fellowship with you and he has pardoned all your sin, as well as appeasing his wrath, in the cross of Christ.
What is true of God is true for humans too. For intimacy to be genuine and growing it will require both parties to stop holding grudges and put away the anger.
1) Nurturing anger and nursing grudges fails to allow hurts to heal. God’s love forgives.
2) Nurturing anger and nursing grudges hinders intimacy. God’s love sees a “you” that others do not and thus invites intimacy.
3) NURTURING ANGER AND NURSING GRUDGES IS REACTIONARY. GOD’S LOVE IS VISIONARY.
Romans 5:8 says, “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Have you ever heard some say something like “You always do that!?” It most cases that is not true – it is just an indication that the offended party sees what they expect to see. If you are looking for a reason to be critical or offended you will certainly find it. Worldly love labels you and then always finds behavioral evidence to reinforce that label. Worldly love creates an environment of mistrust and failure. This also leads to giving ourselves permission and license to respond in kind with in a critical and offensive manner.
God’s love, however, creates a culture of compassion and understanding. God is not simply looking at what you are or have done – God knows what you can be!
God looks beyond our failure and knows you can be whole and holy. God’s view of you is visionary – it is hope-full and wholesome.
What I am saying is that whenever someone we love holds grudges and uses them against other people it prevents us from ever being able to move on. It keeps us caged in a cycle of repetition. Keeping a record of our past defines us and labels us. And God is not in the business of keeping you where you are; he is in the business of helping you move past your failure and into the image of Jesus. God does not bring sin up to keep you humble and close. He covers and forgives your sin. God’s love leaves the past in the past thereby creating an opportunity to begin anew.
“Burying the Hatchet”
It began in 1878. Randolph made an accusation about stealing a hog and included a biting insult to boot. That set things in motion; Ellison was soon shot and killed and that set more things in motion … and … and … and you know it as the feud between the Hatfields and McCoys.
Within a generation or two most had forgotten why they hated the others but they kept on killing and insulting.
It wasn’t until June 14, 2003, 125 years later, that the Hatfields and McCoys officially ended their feud. They let by-gones be by-gones, and signed a document declaring an official end to the hatred and bloodshed. The governors of Kentucky and West Virginia were both present for the ceremony.
I sometimes get the feeling that some of us think God is mad and resentful in a manner like the Hatfields and McCoys. They think there is this long-standing animosity; with no end in sight. But the truth be told, God’s wrath has been appeased. God anger towards your rebellion is solved. It was done on the cross. God signed the peace treaty with the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus.
God turned his face from His son at Calvary so he would not have to turn his face from you.
WRAP-UP
1) Nurturing anger and nursing grudges fails to allow hurts to heal. God’s love forgives.
2) Nurturing anger and nursing grudges hinders intimacy. God’s love sees a “you” that others do not and thus invites intimacy.
3) Nurturing anger and nursing grudges is reactionary. God’s love is visionary.
God is a record shredder not a record keeper. He is making “all things new.” And that same love will work in our relationships too. In fact, until we mature in that love our relationships really will not work.
The solution to both the undercurrent of anger and the record of wrongs is one and the same … forgiveness. That is how God has solved the issue between him and humanity and that is the only way we can solve the issue amongst ourselves.
The “Stream of Forgiveness”
Mirosalv Volf wrote a fantastic book on forgiveness titled “Free of Charge: Giving and Forgiving in a Culture Stripped of Grace.”
In the book he uses the beautiful imagery of a stream to show how God’s character (love) is poured into us by His Spirit and becomes our character.
God is certainly the fountainhead. The stream of love and forgiveness flows from Him because it is His nature and character. Mistakenly, we often think we are at the end point of the stream … the recipient … the forgiven one. But, truth be told, we all stand mid-stream. We are indeed recipients but not the end … we receive His character and then as it becomes our character we pass that same love and forgiveness on to others. We forgive even as we have been forgiven (Col. 3:13).
Let’s read our “Congregational Covenant of Love” together.
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** Much of the material for this sermon is derived from two specific books. 1) Darin Hufford’s “The Misunderstood God” and Henry Drummond’s “The Greatest Thing in the World.”
This sermon is provided by Dr. Kenneth Pell
Potsdam Church of the Nazarene
Potsdam, New York
www.potsdam-naz.org
Congregational Covenant of Love
Heavenly Father, you have taught us that you are love and your Spirit has poured your love into our hearts.
Because you are patient and kind
We will be patient and bear with one another (Ephesians 4:2)
Because you do not envy
We will seek to make peace and build up one another (Rom. 14:19)
Because you are not boastful or proud
We will give preference and honor to one another (Philippians 2:3)
Because you are not rude and self-seeking
We will accept and encourage one another (Rom. 15:13-17)
Because you are not easily angered and keep no record of wrongs
We will forgive others just as we have been forgiven by you (Col. 3:13)
Because you do not delight in evil but do rejoice in truth
We will be loving yet truthful with one another (Ephesians:4:25)
Because you always protect, trust and hope
We will look after the interests of one another (Rom. 12:10) and carry one another’s burdens (Gal. 6:2)
Because you always persevere and and never fail
We will be devoted to one another in brotherly love (Rom. 12:10)
We thank you for showing us how to love and
We will reflect that love in our care for each other. Amen.(1 Cor. 12:25)
