Now I believe that the family is the heartbeat of the church, as we point our kids and pave the way for them to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. And we’re gonna pick up the story today with a look back at the story that we looked at a couple of weeks ago with Hannah and Samuel. If you want to turn in your Bible to 1 Samuel chapter 1, we’re gonna follow along and we’re gonna take a look at this woman of God who had an incredible passion for kids—and especially for her son Samuel, her firstborn, and the commitment that he made.
Hannah is a great role model for us in a variety of ways. Not so much in the way that she had to give up her child rather early in life (Hopefully that won’t be our situation.), but in a variety of different ways we can still learn a great deal from her.
So what I want us to do is I want you to understand the setting which we pick up this story in 1 Samuel 1. Before Samuel was born, Hannah had no children, and for years she pleaded with God for Him to open up her womb. And she desperately wanted a child. So much so that her life was rather miserable when she didn’t have children, and she was constantly saying to her husband how much she wanted kids. In fact, she went through a stretch where she cried all the time and she wouldn’t eat food.
I want you to pick up the story in verse 8 of 1 Samuel 1, and let’s listen to her husband’s foolish question that he asks her. “Her husband Elkanah would say to her, ‘Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don’t you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?’”
Well, evidently not. And guys, this is not a wise question to ask. Neither God nor her husband was meeting the need that she had of wanting a child, and she desperately pleaded with God to provide a child for her.
We could describe this first season of Hannah’s life in one word, and we’ll say the word empty because that’s the way she felt. Look in your Bible at verses 10 and 11. “In her deep anguish Hannah prayed to the Lord, weeping bitterly. And she made a vow, saying, ‘Lord Almighty, if you will only look on your servant’s misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the Lord.’”
Now the priest, Eli, notices her, but he doesn’t think she’s praying; because all he sees is that her mouth is moving but no sound is coming out. So obviously she was trying to pray and keep those prayers just between God and her. And at that moment, Eli misinterprets what’s taking place and he thinks she’s drunk. So he calls her on it and in verse 15 she says, “‘Not so, my lord,’ Hannah replied, ‘I am a woman who is deeply troubled. I have not been drinking wine or beer; I was pouring out my soul to the Lord. Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief.’ Eli answered, ‘Go in peace, and may the God of Israel grant you what you have asked of him.’ She said, ‘May your servant find favor in your eyes.’ Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast.”
Now at this stage Hannah is childless, but she has been given something from the priest, from Eli. She has been given hope—a small measure of hope, but nonetheless she still was given something from him.
And I know that for many moms who come on a Mother’s Day it’s difficult for you to be here, because maybe you haven’t found that right man to marry or maybe you haven’t been able to get pregnant.
And I’m sure that there are many ladies, who are here in this service and on all of our campuses, who have had a difficult time coming to worship on this weekend because maybe you had an abortion years ago and you’re still trying to work through that and deal with the guilt and some of that grief. I just want you to know God can heal. God can forgive. He can do it completely.
Or maybe it’s a tough day because you can relate to Hannah’s barrenness. And if you are a married couple and you find yourselves in a similar circumstance, then pray that God will either give you a child through pregnancy or maybe through adoption or else that God will somehow make up the difference—that somehow He will make up for the wants that you have in your hearts. And maybe He’ll do it in some other way that we could never even imagine. Hannah wanted a baby desperately, but she was not able to conceive. And she went into the temple, and she asked God to give her a child; and in this particular case, God said, “Yes.”
You see, motherhood is a partnership with God. It involves helping to shape the next generation for a lifetime of representing Christ. And Hannah dedicates her son to God. And young Samuel grows up and he becomes one of Israel’s greatest prophets. We’ve been learning about him. He is the same man who confronted Saul. He is the same man who anointed David. That’s who this little boy Samuel grows up to become. His mom had a partnership with God, and this is something that we need to have as well.
Some of you didn’t have a partnership with your mom, and now in adulthood you still feel a level of emptiness because of what you missed out on. The mother of entertainer Barbara Streisand passed away several years ago. Their relationship had long been strained for years and years, and it was a public strain. And when Barbara had her big comeback concert at Madison Square Garden in New York City several years ago, the place was packed out. It was an electric and exciting night. But at one point in the concert she walked down to the second row where her mom was, and she looked at her mom and she said, “Are you proud of me now, Mama? Are you proud of me now?”
Some of you can relate to that, because you have been waiting and wishing for your mother’s blessing—some word of affirmation, any word. Well, you decide today that you will make the choice to break the cycle. Don’t withhold that same gift from your children. We can’t live in the past but we also must learn from the past. We must decide that we’re going to put that behind us. And there’s no wisdom in repeating the mistakes of previous generations.
Well, the second word to describe Hannah’s next stage of life is the word filled. She was filled. Listen to the Scripture in 1 Samuel 1:19 and 20: “Early the next morning they arose and worshiped before the Lord and then went back to their home at Ramah. Elkanah made love to his wife Hannah, and the Lord remembered her. So in the course of time Hannah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Samuel, saying, ‘Because I asked the Lord for him.’”
So she’s thrilled! But you have to understand in the midst of this excitement…I need to point something out to you. I think it’s really easy for us to think that, “Well, boy, if I just have kids, then everything will be okay. If I just have kids, then I will be filled. I will feel fulfilled.” But can I just tell you that, regardless of how you think that might play out, after having a child things change, okay? And I mean that in the sense that God has blessed you with a child, and they do bring fulfillment but there are challenges that come with that child. There are growing pains with the child, and there are growing pains in learning to parent. So what I guess I’m trying to say is you still can’t fill a God-shaped void in your life through a human relationship. It must come through a divine relationship.
And moms, your attitude is so important. You set the tone for the home. You are the one who reinforces the spiritual lessons. Your home should not be a showplace; it should be a training grounds. It is a preparation area. You’re the one who can create an atmosphere of acceptance, a place of peace, an environment of grace and joy.
Some of you have heard Angela Thomas speak. She has spoken here for women’s events. She went through a tough struggle in motherhood, and after she came out the other side, I want to share with you what she wrote. She said, “Mothering requires everything, but eventually everything given plus little replenished equals desperately empty.” She said, “I held the empty cup of my soul out to my husband, and I begged him to fill it. I held it out to a bigger house and to a new van, but only Jesus could fill my soul. I tried my children. I tried my girlfriends. But again they could not fill the place designed by God for Himself.”
Here is Hannah. Her son Samuel is probably six or seven years of age. She only gets to see him once a year after she turns him over to Eli’s instruction and leadership. And that had to be difficult for her. I mean, can you imagine that? Think about the picture that the Bible paints for us of who Eli was. He was a crusty old man. He was overindulgent. He had not been a good father to his kids. They had not turned out the way that he had intended for them to turn out. And now here this mom, who has prayed for a child, has to turn this child over to this man who she thinks, “I’m not sure he’s gonna be a good father figure for him.” But she’d made a promise to God and she kept it.
Now we think of releasing our child as to be when they go off to college or when they leave home or when they go to the military. We think, “That’s when we release them.” But it goes so much earlier than that. It’s very progressive. It begins very early.
Here in our church setting a crying baby or a whining toddler can disrupt the worship experience for thousands of people, and that’s why we have an excellent childcare staffed by loving volunteers who have a heart for kids. They want to make the spiritual growth environment the best it can be in both rooms—in both the sanctuary and also in the nursery. And I always enjoy watching the metamorphosis of the comfort level with moms and when they decide to take their child to the nursery and start checking them in.
Now my daughter Savannah is having to wrestle through the releasing process for the first time with our first grandbaby, and she is raising this little guy deep in the heart of Texas. Although we have Derby parties in Kentucky, she called me last week and they have Cinco de Mayo parties. (Laughter) He already has a full mustache—four and a half months old. It’s unbelievable. (More laughter) For the first three months of his life she said, “I would sit in church toward the back of the sanctuary on the end of an aisle, and if he got fussy or if he got hungry, I could easily slide out without distracting people.” But then last month she swallowed really hard and she began taking him to the church’s nursery during worship. And she said, “It was tough on me.” She said, “At our church we do it differently than how we do it at Southeast.” At Southeast if there is a, you know, a need and the nursery workers want you to check on your child…if they’re crying incessantly or having a really rough time…then they just put up your number and we put it on the screen. But that’s not how they do it at Savannah’s church. Do you know what they do? They text the mom. And they send a text message to the mom. And I said, “Does that work?” And she said, “Well, yeah, I’ve been texted a couple of times already.” And I said, “It just seems kind of weird to me, because I would think that if the nursery staff sent a text to me and said, ‘Your child is crying and won’t stop,’ I would take my phone and I would send back a message and I’d say, ‘Yeah, I know, I hate it when he does that.’” You know? (Laughter) And they’d say, “He’s still crying.” I’d say, “That’s why I put him in the nursery.” You know? (More laughter)
Moms, what I’ve noticed is that, if God blesses you with more children than just one, it becomes easier for you to release them. Have you noticed that? First baby…it may take three months before you feel comfortable checking them into the nursery. Second baby…half the time. Third baby…you’re calling from the Labor and Delivery Room, right? (Laughter) You’re trying to register that child right then.
But Hannah knew she would have to release Samuel much sooner than most. But we all have to walk through that painful process. And if we don’t, it will erode the strength of your marriage relationship. Not to mention it gives the child an unhealthy dependence on their parents. You are raising them to release them. Let me say that again. You are raising them to release them.
So if you can find another couple who have a child and say, “Would you babysit for us so we can have a date night, and we’ll do the same for you?” You trade out, and you don’t have to pay anything. Or save some money up and get a babysitter so that early on it establishes that habit and sends a message that you won’t spend every waking moment with your children. It’s so healthy for your kids to know that. It’s so important for the relationship of the parents. You are releasing your child.
You walk that six-year-old to the bus stop, and she’s really nervous and you are petrified. And the bus pulls up and you say, “Oh, it’s gonna be great. It’s gonna be fun. You’re gonna have a great day.” And she gets on the bus, and she presses her nose up against the window; and she waves goodbye to you and you say, “Yes, it’s great. You’re great.” And then as she pulls off, you walk home and you cry every step of the way. But you are releasing your child.
Or you let your child go to Country Lake Christian Retreat Center, our church camp, this summer. She’s eleven years old and she calls up and says, “Mom, it’s Tuesday and I don’t feel good. And the dean says that the problem with my stomach is something called homesickness. Can you come pick me up?” And you have to say, “You know what? You’re eleven years old. You really need to stay, and I think you’re gonna really enjoy it. We’ll be there on Saturday…unless something better comes up.” (Laughter)
Or when your fifteen-year-old says, “Mom, I want to go on a mission trip to Honduras or to Jamaica or to the Ukraine with the church youth group.” “How long will you be gone?” “We’ll be gone for ten days.” “Oh, I don’t know. I don’t know.” And then you think back to Hannah, and you think of Samuel and you say, “You know what? I am so proud of you that that’s what you want to do: that you want to go on a mission trip.”
And then when they’re eighteen and they go off to college, there is still that lump in your throat. But in time you begin to adjust to the empty nest, because you have been gradually preparing and you have been gradually releasing them all the way since their birth.
And then in adulthood when they come back to visit you, you know they’re coming back because they want to be there, not because they have to be there. And it’s a whole new relationship that develops at that time. You have wisely released your children slowly and you have prepared them for the release.
So Hannah starts off by being empty, and then she is filled. But the third stage of her life is she is poured out. When I say “poured out” I mean, she is pouring into the life of Samuel. Hannah didn’t take him to town when the family went to offer their annual sacrifices to the Lord. She told her husband that some time later she would take him and present him before the Lord, and “he will live there always” with the priest.
First Samuel 1:23 says, “‘Do what seems best to you,’ her husband Elkanah told her. ‘Stay here until you have weaned him; only may the Lord make good his word.’ So the woman stayed at home and nursed her son until she had weaned him.”
Now we think that, “Well, I guess that means that she took him to be with Eli when he was maybe three years of age.” But most scholars think that weaning is not merely relegated to nursing; it probably meant that he was a little bit older than that. And rightly so, because otherwise he would not have been an asset and a big help to Eli at the tabernacle area if that were the case, if he was only three. But whether he was six or seven, the early years of a child’s life can lay a strong foundation for the rest of their life. And Hannah understood that. She didn’t have a lot of time with Samuel as his mother, and so she had to be very intentional about the time that she did have.
And if you walk away from anything from our “Faithful Families” series I hope it’s this: That you have got to be intentional. That you have got to be pouring into your kids. That there is prayer and planning and purpose behind your parenting. And the truest joy of parenting comes when we intentionally pour ourselves out into our kids.
Make certain you get this. Hannah asked God for a son, God gave her a son, and then out of appreciation and gratitude Hannah gave her son back to God. And that’s what we do. That’s what we’re supposed to do. As parents we are supposed to raise our children so that we can give them back to God in service. Hannah knew that Samuel didn’t exist for her. Samuel existed for God. And she existed to serve God above everything else. It’s a wise mother that knows that while it’s nice to be needed, the ultimate goal is for that child one day to be physically, emotionally, spiritually mature and independent of her.
In many ways this is a repeating process throughout parenthood. You are empty and you ask God to provide for you. And God provides at times in some situations with a child. And He gives you wisdom and He gives you patience. And you’re filled with the joy that comes from this child and the pride of parenthood. And you then pour into your child and you give them over to the work of God rather than keeping them for yourself.
I mean, this is really understandable if you think about it. You don’t want your child to simply be a sponge indefinitely—that all they do is take in. If a sponge absorbs everything and never releases what it holds or shares what it has acquired with other people, then it cannot serve its purpose. A sponge would be of no good in your garage or in your kitchen because it would simply rot if that were the case. In order for it to function, it has to share what it has. It has to be released. And that’s how it is with our kids.
I think that there were a couple of things that really motivated Hannah as a mom. One, she understood that her child really was a gift from God. In fact, Samuel’s name means that “the Lord has heard my prayer.” So she knew that her son was this treasure given to her by God.
So it begs the question for each of us today. When you think about your children, what do you think? I mean, do you see them as an interruption to your schedule, or do you see them as a treasure that God has entrusted to your care?
The other thing that Hannah realized was that her time with Samuel was very limited. Hannah would soon have to take Samuel to the tabernacle and leave him there. And sometime later we read that Hannah “brought him to the house of the Lord at Shiloh.” And this was kind of like a formal dedication that’s taking place. Look in 1 Samuel chapter 1 beginning in verse 25. They sacrificed first. So it says, “When the bull had been sacrificed, they brought the boy to Eli (who was the priest), and she said to him, ‘Pardon me, my lord. As surely as you live…’” And she’s gonna remind him of who she is. “‘I am the woman who stood here beside you praying to the Lord. I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the Lord. For his whole life he will be given over to the Lord.’ And he worshiped the Lord there.”
Moms, you may be asking, “Okay, well that’s great, but how do I give my child to the Lord? I mean, what does that look like?” Well, I think there are different ways and different steps. We have a family dedication three times a year where we allow parents to make a serious commitment of saying, “We want to raise this child to know Jesus Christ and to love Jesus Christ.” And so we give that opportunity.
We have numerous programming that takes place in our nursery. Our kids are taught God’s Word from six months on up. Our elementary program is second to none. Our student ministry is knocking it out of the park.
Our women’s ministry has a program where moms and daughters together can study God’s Word. It’s called P31. It stands for Proverbs 31, and it’s an interactive Bible Study between moms and their daughters. And it’s fun and it’s a great way to invest in the life of your daughter—one that you’ll never regret. There’s information in the bulletin about it.
But it goes beyond just a service. It goes beyond just Bible Studies. This has to be a 24/7 proposition for you. I mean, this parenting has got to be a calling in your life, where you say, “God has entrusted me with these kids. How can I pour myself out into them so that they can, in years to come, pour themselves out?”
And can I just be real honest with you? It is a prayer journey. I mean, you have to ask for God’s guidance and wisdom and discernment and strength all the way through at different junctions. (A baby begins to cry in the audience) I hear a baby crying. We’re praying for you right now. (Laughter) You know, you have to say, “Lord, You’re gonna have to give me the strength. I can’t do this on my own.”
What if parents were to begin praying for their kids? What if grandparents said, “Every morning at breakfast we’re gonna spend five minutes praying for each grandchild by name”? Do you have any idea how that could positively impact and influence your legacy, the branches that come out from your family tree—from the tree that God has planted in your life?
My mom began praying for my wife-to-be when I was two years old, and she never stopped. And I have an attractive, godly, Christian wife because of my mom’s prayers. My mother-in-law used to say, “I wish I would’ve prayed as hard as your mom did.” (Laughter) It’s not that funny, okay? All right?
Hannah’s prayer was simple; it was specific, and it was sincere. And that’s a good template for our prayers as well.
I remember when I was a kid my mom said to me, “My favorite verse in all the Bible is 3 John 4. And I went and I read it and I thought, “Well, this isn’t that great. I mean, there are tons of different verses that you could choose. Why…why choose that one?” “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.” I didn’t understand it then; I do now.
The “pouring out stage” is when you have poured out and now they give out to others what they have been filled up with. And God made us in such a way that only He can fill the void. And Hannah realizes the truth that you aren’t really filled up until you can let go. And if you aren’t willing to pour back out, you were never filled up in the first place. That’s why the goal of parenting is to raise them to know the Lord so that you can release them. And the investment of a mother into her kids—it cannot be matched. It cannot be beaten. And when moms are faithful to their husbands and to their kids and to God, homes will flourish. It takes the faithfulness of a mom to create a faithful family.
And if you think about it, it’s amazing what parents do. It’s amazing what moms do. My wife was in Lexington yesterday for seven hours watching a double-header of my son’s baseball game. That’s just what you moms do. And you don’t get a whole lot of thanks for it, but you knock yourselves out. And you want your kids to achieve in some arena. Maybe it’s academics. Maybe it’s musically. Maybe it’s with sports.
If you are a parent I want you to ask yourself, “What extent are you willing to go to for your child to grow spiritually? What price are you willing to pay to ensure and pave the way for your child to grow up and have a genuine faith?”
We’ve been blessed here at Southeast to have so many moms who are doing such a great job of pouring into the next generation, and we want to take just a minute to honor them and to pray for them. So if you are a mom, I would just ask for you to stand so that we can recognize you and thank you and remain standing. (Audience applauding as moms stand throughout the auditorium) Wow! Just look around. We are very blessed. It’s unbelievable. Take the hand of a mom beside you or nearby, if you feel comfortable doing that, and let me pray on their behalf.
Father in heaven, You have blessed us in so many different ways with so many blessings that You have entrusted to us through our children. And Lord, we come to You today and we just say, “Thank You.” Lord, we pray that these ladies who are standing will know just how valuable they are to the Kingdom and to us. Father, I pray for the single moms who are standing. I pray that You will just be so close to them, that they will realize that You are the best partner that they could ever have with whom to parent. And I pray, Lord, that You will remind them of the words in Psalm 68 where it says that you are a “Father to the fatherless.” And Lord, I pray for the working moms who are standing. And I’m sure at times they wish they could be at home and their situation might not allow that to happen. In order to make ends meet, they have to work. And Lord, I pray that You will just multiply the hours that they have with their kids. Just as You did with Hannah, that You will do the same with them. And although their time is limited, that they will make the most of every opportunity. Lord, I pray for the stay-at-home moms. And Lord, I pray that they are thankful that they get to stay at home and that they see that as a true blessing and opportunity. I also know that many of them have sacrificed because it means that they have little to live off of and they do without some things. Lord, I pray that You will just multiply their resources and that You will stretch that and that You will give them incredible joy as they pour into these little lives that they have. Lord, there are moms who are standing who have lost a mom this year, and it’s the first Mother’s Day that they’ve had since they had their mom here with them. I pray a special measure of blessing for them as well. Father, You have blessed us. These moms…they give a listening ear. They give a comforting word. At times they share a stern glance when it’s needed. They give reassuring hugs and they give heartfelt prayers. And we tell You today that we love them and that we’re thankful for them. It’s in Jesus’ name that we pray. Amen.
Unless otherwise noted: "Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. 2012, Southeast Christian Church of Jefferson County, Kentucky, Inc. Provided by license agreement for non-commercial use by authorized users only.
Accompanying Resources for the series by Dave Stone:
Raising Your Kids to Love the Lord (2012 Dave Stone, Thomas Nelson Publishers)
Building Family Ties with Faith, Love & Laugher (2012 Dave Stone, Thomas Nelson Publishers)
How to Raise Selfless Kids in a Self-Centered World (2013 Dave Stone, Thomas Nelson Publishers)
www.pastordavestone.com; www.southeastchristian.org
