#9~Col.3:9-21 HUSBANDS LOVE YOUR FAMILY 1-19-14
9Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the old man with his deeds;
The old man is all that a person was before being saved, his worldly thinking and sinful acts.-- But now that we're saved lets not bring reproach on Jesus our Saviour, He said in Jn.14:6 "I am the ... truth."
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10And have put on the new man, which is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him:
~Put off all those old habits, just as you would discard an outworn suit of clothes which no longer fit you. -- The more a believer knows and understands the things of God, the more he will reveal a Godly character and conduct.
--- Paul calls the believer to a deeper obedience, he tells us to bridle our tongue (as did James in James 1:26.
~ Because the new man is renewed in knowledge he is always hungry to know more about what God says in His Word. -- We have a desire to understand it.
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11Where there is neither Greek [gentile] nor Jew, circumcision nor uncircumcision, Barbarian, Scythian, bond nor free: but Christ is all, and in all.
Barbarians were considered a lower class of people because they couldn't or didn't speak the Greek language. --
Scythian; people were known for their cruelty, an un-civilized people, and were regarded by the ancients as standing extremely low in intelligence and civilization.
~ The new man is part of a family, which favors no race, nationality, or class of any people. -- It only favors Jesus, because in this new family, Christ is all and in all. ~~~ This work of the new creation not only deals with the old man, but gives us the new man patterned after Jesus Christ; it also breaks down the barriers that separate people in society. ~~ A barrier is something used to close an opening. ~~
~ Among new creation people, it doesn't matter if a person is Greek or Jew or circumcised or uncircumcised or a Barbarian or Scythian or a slave or a free man.
~~ All those barriers are broken down. --- All sort of barriers existed in the ancient Roman world; and the power of God through the Gospel of Jesus Christ broke them all down.
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~In verse 13 we learn that Paul is talking about believers, forgiving believers.
12Put on therefore, as the elect of God, (holy and beloved,) bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
"Put on", means to take on, or assume certain virtues and qualities. --- "Bowels of mercies" means heartfelt compassion.
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13Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.
"Forbearing one another" means to, make an effort to put up with things we dislike, and try to get along with people who disagree with us. --- Christians can disagree without being disagreeable.
The word "forgiving" is much like the word grace, and means to bestow favor unconditionally.
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14And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness. ~Above what things? -- bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; 13 -- Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another,
The phrase "bond of perfection" ~ makes us think of a "prison chain or bond" which is described as leading to Christian maturity. --- The love produced by Christ constrains, restricts, or forces Christians to love and serve one another.
~~ "Charity" is love, here called the bond of perfect -- ness, -- [Charity - Love] -- completes the list of virtues required for perfect-ness or spiritual maturity. As a "bond" it binds all other virtues together in harmony and unity.
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15And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful.
"The peace of God" is the harmony and ability, created by God* to get along among His people. ~ It is to rule. ~ This means, to act as an umpire who makes decisions in an athletic contest. ~~ "let the peace of God rule in your hearts" means, that when believers are at odds with each other, whatever the course of action may be best to maintains peace and harmony, is the course to be taken.
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16Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.
~~ This is the only time the phrase "the word of Christ" is used in the N.T. Other references refer to "the word of God" and "the word of the Lord." "The word of Christ" refers to the revealed word, whether spoken by Christ or of Christ.
~~ When believers are forbearing, forgiving (v. 13), and loving toward one another (v. 14) when peace reigns among God's people (v. 15), -- believers are then capable to receive the blessings produced by the word of Christ.
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17And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.
~ Do all in the name of the Lord Jesus: -- as new creatures in Christ Jesus, believers should strive to do all things in the name of the Lord Jesus, how many times have we come to a difficult situation? -- all of us I'm sure, lets remember to do these things "in His name" and pray if it's His will, it'll all work out.
~ This is just another benefit of being a child of God, the lost sinner can't make such a request, he may say the words, but it's always in vain.
The only words a lost sinner can say and God answer is, Lord forgive me of my sins and save me.
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18Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
* Now, I'm gon-na make all the ladies mad at me.
Wives, submit: The Greek word translated "submit" is a word borrowed from the military. --- It literally means "to be under in rank." --- It speaks of the way that an army is organized among levels of rank, with Generals and Colonels and Majors and Captains and Lieutenants and Sergeants and Privates.
~There are levels of rank, and one is obligated to respect those in higher rank.
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~ We know that as a person, a Private can be smarter, more talented, and a better person than a General. --- But he is still under rank to the General.
~ He isn't submitted to the General so much as a person, as he is too the General as a General. ---
~~ In the same way, the wife doesn't submit to her husband because he deserves it. --- She submits because he is her husband.
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~The idea of submission doesn't have anything to do with someone being smarter or better or more talented. It has to do with a God-appointed order.
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~Wives, submit to your own husbands: --- This defines the extent of a wife's submission -- "to her own husband."
The Bible never commands a general submission of women unto men.
It is commanded only in the home and in the church. --- God does not command that men have exclusive authority in the areas of politics, business, education, and so on.
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~ In no place does the Scripture teach an unqualified, without exception, submission - except to God and God alone.
As is fitting in the Lord: --- This is a very important phrase. ---- It covers everything we're to understand about this passage. ---- The command to submit is not absolute.
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There are exceptions to this command for a wife to submit to her own husband.
~ When the husband asks the wife to sin, she must not submit.
~ When the husband is medically incapacitated, insane, or under the influence of mind altering substances, the wife may not submit.
~ When the husband is violent and physically threatening, the wife may not submit.
~ When the husband breaks the marriage bond by adultery, the wife is not obligated to be at peace with, and except the husband's adulterous relationship as her duty.
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19Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.
~~There are two Greek words meaning "to love" appear in the Bible.
The word phileo means "to have affection and feeling"--a type of impulsive love.
~~The other word agape means "to have esteem" or "high regard."
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> Eph.5:33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
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Husbands, love your wives: ~~ Paul's words to husbands safeguards his words to wives. --- Though wives are to submit to their husbands, it never excuses husbands acting as tyrants over their wives. ---- Instead, a husband must love his wife, and the Greek word translated love her is agape. -- Not phileo- a type of impulsive love.
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"Agape" does not mean affection or romantic attachment; it means, a caring love, a deliberate attitude of mind that concerns itself with the well-being of the one loved." a sacrificial, giving, absorbing, love.
~ The word has little to do with emotion; it has much to do with self-denial for the sake of another.
1. It is a love that loves without changing.
2. It is a self-giving love that gives without demanding or expecting re-payment.
3. It is love so great that it can be given to the unlovable or unappealing.
4. It is love that loves even when it is rejected.
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"Agape love" gives and loves because it wants to; --- it does not demand or expect repayment from the love given. --- It gives because it loves, it does not love in order to receive.
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~And do not be bitter against them: ---
This seems to imply that perhaps at times, the wife may give the husband some reason to be bitter. --- But Paul says, "be not bitter against them."
~We don't see any exempts, "be not bitter against them" no matter how the wife has been towards the husband. --- This is not a suggestion, it's a command.
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~Notice, It don't say that the husbands are not to be bitter, we may very well be bitter, but not against them. -- She's to be respected. -- She, most of the time has a reason to complain any - way. -- But what ever the reason, "be not bitter against them".
~ This agape love is the kind of love Jesus has for His people and this is the love husbands should have towards their wives.
>Ephesians 5: 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; --
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20Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.
Children, obey your parents in all things:
~Paul has in mind children who are still in their parents' household and under their authority. --- The children that are still at still at home must not only honor their father and mother, but they must also obey them, and obey them in all things.
~ When a child is grown and out of their parents' household, they are no longer under the same obligation of obedience, but the obligation to honor your father and mother remains.
> Eph.6:1-3 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. 2Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) 3That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
~Children that honor their parents have the prospect of living a long life.
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~ for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.
~ This is one of the important reasons for a child's obedience. ---- When a child respects their parent's authority, they are respectful of God's order of authority in other areas of life.
~ This idea of an order of authority and submission to an order of authority, are so important to God that they are part of His very being. ---
~ The First Person of the Holy Trinity is called the Father; the Second Person of the Holy Trinity is called the Son. --- In those titles, we find a relationship of authority and submission to authority.
~ The Father exercises authority over the Son, and the Son submits to the Father's authority. --- And this is in the very nature and being of God.
~ Our failure to exercise Biblical authority, and our failure to submit to Biblical authority, isn't just wrong, it's sin against the very nature of God.
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21Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.
~Fathers and Mothers both can provoke their children by being too harsh, too demanding, and too controlling, unforgiving, or just showing their anger.
~ This harshness can be expressed through words, and through actions.
~ Parents, and specially fathers, are told not to irritate their children by being so unreasonable in their demands, that their children lose heart and come to think that it is useless trying to please their parents.
~ Lest they become discouraged:
~In putting this together I read that, children who grow up with parents who provoke them will become discouraged, and they will come to believe that the whole world is against them, because they feel their parents are against them.
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