He done you wrong. He did. I don’t know who “he” is. I don’t know what “he done.” I just know that, whoever he or she is, and whatever he or she did, I’m right, aren’t I? He done you wrong. She done you wrong. Do you have that person in mind? Do you remember what that person did? He cheated on you. She insulted you. He lied about you. She stole from you. He embarrassed you. She tried to get you fired. He was just rude. She threatened you. Am I close yet?
And somewhere, back there in the past, you decided whether or not you’d forgive that person. Also, somewhere there in the past is the set of ground rules you apply when it comes to forgiving. There are certain parameters; certain do’s and don’ts governing your choices. Not only do those control the way you acted in the past, but you’ve got them at the ready for the next person who “does you wrong.” You’ll need them, because most likely someone else is there just waiting to be the next person who “does you wrong.”
Peter thought he’d run his ground rules past Jesus. (Mt 18) It was a popular teaching of the day that if someone wronged you, you forgave them up to 3X. After that, you were done. You could go ahead and act the way you really felt like acting instead.
I can relate to Peter, and I’ll bet you can too. I’m trying to imagine Peter’s thoughts as he listens to Jesus speak about how we need to resolve differences with the people that hurt us. I wonder if Peter has someone specific in mind. Can’t you just hear him thinking…
“The rabbis say I have to forgive 3X. I could suggest, being a follower of Jesus and all, that maybe we should try 4X. Knowing Jesus, though, He’ll probably say that’s not enough. I know - I’ll double it – I’ll do even better. Yeah – I’ll go for 7X. God likes 7. Surely Jesus can’t expect me to forgive someone more than 7X.” So, Peter asks a question that should have never been asked:
Matthew 18:21-22
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
Not what Peter was hoping for. What Peter and us really need is a lesson about life in the Kingdom of Heaven. Living under God’s rule involves us in something deeper – more than just setting some cap where we can finally quit things – like showing forgiveness when we don’t feel like it. The occasion called for a parable, which we’ll be reading today from Matthew 18. Jesus often turned to parables to make a point. They were stories based on true-to-life situations. The main point of this parable is pretty easy. It’s a story about forgiveness – yours, mine, and how we extend it to others.
Matthew 18:23-27
Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. The servant fell on his knees before him. “Be patient with me,” he begged, “and I will pay back everything.” The servant's master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.
I’d like the story to just stop there. Instead, Jesus tells us to do something that’s usually difficult – but what’s even tougher about it is the way He says it’s a matter of whether we’ll be allowed into Heaven or not. If you’ve been forgiven, God has some expectations of you…
If you’ve been forgiven,
I. You Realize the Enormity of Your Sin
(1. It’s Huge)
Unless a doctor convinces you that you need surgery, you’re not going to have it!
And if that’s where you’re at this morning - convinced that you’re in fine shape for Judgment Day - then you haven’t got a reason to change a thing about your life right now, do you?
Nope, if sin is no big deal, why stress over it or change anything?
But this parable pictures sin as a huge problem.
The Bible describes Heaven as a place where…
Revelation 21:27
Nothing impure will ever enter it, nor will anyone who does what is shameful or deceitful…
When the perfect and just God sets down a law, He can’t overlook it. Sin is a huge problem.
Paul reminds the Ephesians:
Ephesians 2:12
remember that at that time you were separate from Christ, excluded from citizenship in Israel and foreigners to the covenants of the promise, without hope and without God in the world.
Sin gives us the legal problem of guilt that we’ll face on Judgment Day, and it gives us the current problem of making us spiritually sick. Regardless of what we call it, it’s huge!
(2. It’s Hopeless)
So we can all appreciate this, let’s take a crash course in 1st cent. Roman currency. Assuming you have a typical job, and you work for a day, you’ll be paid a denarius. A denarius = 1 day’s wages. OK, work for 100 days – about 20 work weeks, and you’ll be able to turn in your 100 denarii for a mina. 100 day’s wages = 1 mina. Save those minas up for a really long time, until you have 60, and you could trade them in for 1 talent. 60 minas = 1 talent. In other words, 1 talent = 6,000 denarii = 6,000 day’s wages.
Now let’s go back to our friend here in the story. What does he owe? 10,000 talents. 10,000 is a number that’s sometimes used to simply say, “countless.” Do the math here: This man owes 10,000 of the big ones – that’s the same as 60 mil. day’s wages! (10,000 talents = 60,000,000 denarii)
The next time you’re feeling a little overwhelmed by your current debt load at home, read this story again! You can always find someone who’s worse off! This guy will be that someone!
”Be patient with me!” He says, “And I’ll repay it all to you!” That would take a lot of patience, because this guy would have to put in 5 days a week for 230,769 years at the going rate!
This man’s debt was hopeless.
At some point, we’ll all be called to settle accounts. “Hey, pay up!” God will say.
We’re accustomed to this in the day-to-day: It’s called: the credit card bill, the test at the end of the week, the cholesterol blood screening…
And the credit card company, the teacher or professor, the doctor who’s been tracking your health – says, “OK, it’s time to pay up! It’s time to give where you’ve taken, to explain what you’ve done, to show what you’ve learned. Let’s settle your account.”
The problem is, when you finally take an honest look at the ledger, you’re in bad shape – no, wait, you’re in terrible shape – no, hold it, it’s worse than that. In fact, it’s hopeless!
When you sit down with God to look at the ledger books of your life, what do you see? Romans 5 says we’re already destined to die once. Thanks, Adam! But on top of that, I read in Ro 3, where all have sinned and continue to fall short of the glory of God, and in ch 6 that the payment for sin is death. So, when payday comes, the ledger books are going to show a negative balance. They’ll say that what I’ve earned is eternity in hell. Oh, my good deeds will be on the list, and they may even offset it a little by a denarius or two, if I’ve really done well. But that won’t begin to make a dent in the huge debt I’ve hung out in front of myself. It would be like the guy in this story who owes 10,000 talents. It’s hopeless on my own. What will I do? I owe it. I can’t begin to pay it. I’m out of options here.
But it’s in that enlightened moment, when I realize the enormity of what I owe, that I manage to do the right thing…
(3. It’s Why You Seek Forgiveness)
Realizing the enormity of your sin is what leads you to seek God’s forgiveness.
If you’ve been forgiven this morning, it’s because, at some point in your life, you quit saying that sin is no big deal - you realized your great need and you realized that you can’t meet it on your own; it’s because at some point you pronounced Jesus as Lord, and you repented of that old way of life; it’s because you were baptized and there you made an appeal to God “God, please, forgive me! Wipe away the debt! Clean my conscience from guilt!” If you’re forgiven, it’s because you finally accepted the fact that your sin is a big deal, and you let God deal with it!
And if you really are forgiven, then...
II. You Realize the Enormity of God’s Compassion
V27- the servant’s master took pity on him. He was filled with compassion. He cancelled the debt, and released him.
Let’s go down a side road to another parable that Jesus told (Lk 7). Like most of the parables, there’s a specific reason Jesus tells it. He’s visiting in the house of a man named Simon, having a meal there. In comes a woman, one with a reputation. But she has realized the enormity of her sin, and she’s seeking forgiveness from Jesus. She’s at His feet, washing them with her tears, wiping them with her hair, and pouring perfume on them, kissing them – in the purest sense of the word she’s adoring Jesus. Simon’s thinking to himself, “Wow, Jesus doesn’t realize what kind of woman this is!”
Luke 7:40-48
Jesus answered him, "Simon, I have something to tell you." "Tell me, teacher," he said. "Two men owed money to a certain moneylender. One owed him five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. Neither of them had the money to pay him back, so he canceled the debts of both. Now which of them will love him more?" Simon replied, "I suppose the one who had the bigger debt canceled." "You have judged correctly," Jesus said. Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, "Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven--for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little." Then Jesus said to her, "Your sins are forgiven."
This woman had an extreme response. She realized the enormity of her sin, and she also realized the enormity of God’s compassion.
Part of what motivated the Apostle Paul came from remembering just how huge God’s grace was toward him.
1 Timothy 1:15-16
Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners--of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life.
Once you manage to realize the enormity of your sin, you can realize what a huge task it is to remove that sin! And if that’s where you are this morning, praise God! The fact that God will forgive you from the very worst of lives is just an even bigger reason for you to be amazed at His love!
Why do you suppose Jesus wants His followers to gather together on a regular basis and remember His death for us? It’s not to make us squirm and grovel in our sins. Yes, it’s to remind us of how huge our sin problem was, but it’s also to remind us that God’s grace is even bigger! When you put those 2 things together, meeting around the Lord’s table becomes an awesome appointment with God that you wouldn’t miss!
Satan wants you to remember your sin and then feel dirty and hopeless. He wants you to say, “Oh, well, I’ve blown it so bad, what does it matter now?” But God wants you to realize just as much the enormity of His compassion for you. Then, there’s another step…
III. You Should Realize the Smallness of Sins Against You
Let’s go back to 1st century Roman currency. This man, who was forgiven a debt equal to 60 mil. days’ wages, has someone who owes him money too.
Matthew 18:28-30
But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. 'Pay back what you owe me!' he demanded. His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.' "But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt.
100 denarii – remember, that’s 100 days’ wages. This guy, who was just forgiven 60 mil. days’ wages has, by the throat, a guy who owes him an amount that’s 600,000 times less!
Look at the words he uses: “Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.” Deja vu! The words are the same ones the other servant had used.
Jesus gives 2 big contrasts in this story:
One is the size of one debt compared to the other. There’s no comparison. 600,000:1
The other contrast is the reaction of the lenders: one shows enormous compassion. The other shows none. The first servant has lost the perspective that forgiveness should have given him.
Perspective is important here.
The earth seems really big when you’re hiking up a mountain. But look at the earth next to the sun, and it doesn’t look so big. Maybe you’re facing some physical ailment, but if you go visit someone who’s bedfast and hurting, your wart doesn’t seem as big!
The same thing happens when we’re careful to keep our own mess-ups in perspective. If I can just manage to remember the enormity of what God has forgiven me, I have a better perspective of the smallness of how others have wronged me.
We sang about it today, remember? “Where the wrongs we have done, and the wrongs done to us Were nailed there with Him, There at the cross.” I remember when those words first struck home with me. It’s the same cross that’s dealing with all our sins. I’m counting on the cross of Jesus to deal with my sin against God and others. Can I trust it to handle the things that have been done against me? It’s the same cross dealing with those sins.
Some of the boldest and most fearful words we can ever pray are the ones that Jesus taught us to use when He said, “and forgive us our debts, in the same way we forgive those who are indebted to us.” What would happen this morning if God were to forgive you in the same way you were forgiving to others?
If you’ve been forgiven, you should realize the smallness of sins against you.
IV. You Bear the Obligation of Forgiving Others
This has all been an introduction to a sermon with this one point: We fail to forgive because we fail to remember how God forgave us.
Matthew 18:31-34
When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,' he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
There’s something just not right about this guy. When someone has such an unforgiving and ugly spirit, it affects everyone. The master, who was earlier moved with compassion for this man to forgive him, is now moved by anger to punish him. Here’s the conclusion of the whole thing:
v35 "This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart."
Ill - A man talking with John Wesley once bragged, "I never forgive." Wesley very wisely said, "Then, sir, I hope that you never sin." If you’ve been forgiven, the necessary outcome is that you be a person of forgiveness – one who forgives from the heart.
It’s easy on paper, but what if we start putting some names and faces to all this theory? There are some common places where we struggle with this whole thing.
• Have you been through a divorce, or watched someone you love go through it?
• Have you had someone cheat you in a business deal?
• Have you been hurt by someone’s words to your face, or maybe behind your back?
• Have you had to stand back and watch someone you love being wronged by someone else?
If you’ve been forgiven, the necessary outcome is that you learn to forgive those people – from the heart – not just mumbling it, not just putting on a smile when inside you’d like to tear out their hair, but actually releasing them and the right to expect or demand anything from them; to take on a mindset that keeps you from ever speaking evil of them or asking God to get them.
Jesus said, “his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.” Does Jesus mean what He says or not? How can we accept the forgiveness of God, how can we expect to have Him remove our debt, if we can’t forgive the smallness of what has been done against us? Jesus says we can’t!
Applications:
I want you and me to leave here, free of the burden of un-forgiveness and assured of our own forgiveness.
Let’s do something very practical. Take your bulletin, a pen, and let’s do some writing.
Write this down: Whom have I not forgiven?
Just think through it –
Does this offense bother me more than my own offenses against God?
Has this debt been as erased by me as much as God has erased my debt?
If you’ll be honest, you’ll identify whom you haven’t forgiven from the heart. Write them down.
1. Compare the debts
What was done against you, or what is it that you’re having trouble forgiving?
Does it outweigh what God has erased from your record? Is this offense really as big everything you’ve done against God?
2. Forgive them from the heart
Take a moment right now and pray about it. Remember to God what He has erased from your past, and ask Him for that kind of compassion to forgive others. (pray) (INVITATION TIME)
(Invitation follow-up)
3. Tell them – if that’s possible or helpful
It may take a from-the-heart letter. It may take a phone call. It may be impossible because you don’t even know the person or they died. It may stir up more trouble than it helps with – you know – “I really think you’re a heel, and I forgive you.”
But, what if you were to call up someone and sincerely say, “Brother _____, I just called to tell you that for some time I’ve been carrying around a grudge against you, and that was wrong of me. I was hurt by something you said/did but I’m getting rid of the baggage. I have to admit God has forgiven me of far worse things, and I want to be like Him. I just wanted you to know that I’m not carrying that around anymore. I’m no longer going to let it be something that stands between us. Have a nice day!” The clunk you hear on the other end of the line will be that person passing out and hitting the floor! But that’s not all that will happen. That great feeling you have will be the letting go of the burden you’ve carried around until you finally were willing to forgive.
God knows about us that we need, for our own sakes, to forgive. And if you didn’t know it until today, now you do – that if we want to be forgiven, we must be people who forgive.
