The Serenity Prayer
"O God and Heavenly Father, Grant to us the serenity of mind to accept that which cannot be changed; the courage to change that which can be changed, and the wisdom to know the one from the other, through Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen.”
Introduction
The Serenity Prayer is the common name for an untitled prayer originally written by theologian Reinhold Niebuhr in the late1930s to early 1940s. It is believed that Niebuhr wrote the prayer for a sermon. The version under the title of this paper is from a New York Times Book Review which quoted the prayer on July 12, 1942. This may be one of the most popular prayers of today.
The serenity prayer is reported to have been in use in Alcoholics Anonymous since the early 1940s. It has also been used in Narcotics Anonymous and other Twelve-step programs.. The Alcoholics Anonymous version of the serenity prayer omits some of Niebuhr's text: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and (the) wisdom to know the difference."
Niebuhr's daughter, Elisabeth Sifton, wrote an entire book about her father's serenity prayer, The Serenity Prayer: Faith and Politics in Times of Peace and War.
This simple prayer is a powerful prayer that has been the foundation of many in recovery. What are some truths about this prayer that have made it so influential?
1. SERENITY IS A DESIRED STATE OF MIND. (“O God and Heavenly Father, Grant to us the serenity of mind…”)
What Does Serenity Mean to you? Serenity means peace of mind, quietness, and calmness. When your mind is clear, your heart is full of love, and you are able to spread love all around you; it’s that moment when you know that you have touched the serenity state of being.
This prayer admits and asks that there is a God and He can move on our behalf. Someone has said that “Serenity is the proof that you have a strong connection with God and you need courage and wisdom to touch this level of divine connection.”
Philippians 4:7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
2. SERENITY PRAYER HAS BEEN A PATHWAY OUT OF ADDICTION.
Many people are unable to deal with the hard moments in their lives. Substance abuse may be one way that people try to comfort themselves. Serenity, however, is the true state that we seek and alcohol, drugs, food, sex, or other addictions cannot fill that void.
The serenity prayer appeals to God to grant serenity.
Why do you think this prayer is so powerful in addiction recovery?
3. ACCEPTANCE AS THE KEY TO HAPPINESS. (“…to accept that which cannot be changed”)
Does acceptance mean that we are not trying to make things better? What are some examples of things you cannot change? Why is it hard to accept?
There are situations where you cannot do anything. Even if you want to, even if you look for a solution.
Kent Doss writes: Sometimes what we want to change most, are other people in our lives, whether they are friend or foe. One of the hardest things to accept in life has to be the inability to change other people, especially the people that we love. Certainly we can provide encouragement and resources, but it is virtually impossible to force another person to change unless he or she is willing to change themselves. Anyone who has loved someone through addiction knows that struggle.
He continues: And anyone who has moved through recovery knows the struggle of not being able to change the past. Every one of us has regrets, a bad decision made here and there. We can do our best to mend a relationship that has been damaged, but the past is the past, there’s no erase in life. There is nothing we can do to change it.
There are things you just have to accept the way they are. You have no power to change them. It’s not about you, it’s just about the nature of the situation. The prayer for serenity seeks acceptance so that we can lay aside worry. This prayer says that we are living in the now, in the present moment while letting go of control and fear.
Philippians 4:11 I don’t say this out of need, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I find myself.
4. COURAGE TO BUILD A NEW LIFE (“…the courage to change that which can be changed…”)
This prayer is an expression of courage to build a new life - to start again from nothing. It takes courage to make a change. To get out of a toxic relationship. To start a new business when a previous business failed. To make new associations that can help you and leave behind those that keep you entrenched in old habits. We all should be bold and confident when we are able to make a change for the better. This prayer suggests we are taking an active part in changing now.
Kent Doss: People who know this prayer know that change is a hard thing to do. As creatures of habit, we rarely choose change, even when we know it will bring about an improvement in our lives. No one likes change. I recently read the only person who really likes change is a wet baby. So while we hope our faith leads to courage to change the world, we also hope it leads to courage make the little changes that improve our life, baby step by baby step.
Ashley Candelmo writes that this is “a quality that enables me to deal with the problems and realities of life without reliance on alcohol, drugs, or self-destructive behavior. A determination to stand my ground and get through all issues. A strength of spirit to face and handle the negative. To step through fear while practicing faith, humility, and honesty.’
Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous; don’t be terrified or afraid of them. For the Lord your God is the one who will go with you; he will not leave you or abandon you.”
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; in all your ways know him, and he will make your paths straight.
5. WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE (“the wisdom to know the one from the other”)
Candelmo: I am asking for the ability to rise above my ego. I release judgments out my life and myself. I then use my ability to ask for guidance from myself, others, and God. I learn through my experience and other’s experiences.
James 1:5 Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God—who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly—and it will be given to him.
6. FOCUS ON A WALK WITH GOD (“through Jesus Christ our Lord”)
We are not alone on our journey through life.
God is always ready to come close to us and help us.
Conclusion
1. You can learn it by heart because it is short and simple.
2. You can keep this in your mind and you can say it anytime you need and anywhere.
3. If you feel that you need more power in a particular moment, or you need peace, call on God through this prayer and God will come and will show you the power of the serenity prayer.
The Serenity Prayer Long Version
God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
If I surrender to His Will;
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life
And supremely happy with Him
Forever and ever in the next.
Amen.
__________
Resources
The History of the Serenity Prayer By DavidPaul Doyle
https://ezinearticles.com/?The-History-of-the-Serenity-Prayer&id=552531
Serenity Prayer Benefits and History
https://www.guardian-angel-reading.com/blog-of-the-angels/the-serenity-prayer-full-version-7-benefits-history/
The Serenity Prayer and Seven Lessons From It by Derek Hill
https://whatchristianswanttoknow.com/serenity-prayer-and-7-lessons-from-it/
Sermon on the Serenity Prayer by Kent Doss
https://chalicenotes.blogspot.com/2011/11/sermon-serenity-prayer.html
The Serenity Prayer Broken Down by Ashley Candelmo
https://www.jcrecoverycenter.com/blog/serenity-prayer-broken
