Transition video: Skit Guys - “Unplug”
Our Theme this year - Breakthrough 2020
Thesis: In 2020 we are looking for spiritual breakthroughs in our lives, our relationships, our souls, our families, our church, our school, and our community. This is our vision and prayer! But to get the desired breakthrough in these areas requires us to have 20 – 20 vision from the Lord. We need to see into the spiritual realm and learn how to use His weapons which will bring us the spiritual breakthroughs we seek.
Scripture Texts:
2 Corinthians 10:3-4: “For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.”
Philippians 4:19: "And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus."
Sermon 1: Breakthrough in Relationships
Thesis: With the inner guiding and power of the Holy Spirit we can learn how to get a breakthrough in bad or strained relationships. Breakthrough is possible in most relationships if we allow the Holy Spirit to teach us key relationship skills. God designed us all to be in relationship with Him and with each other and he will help us get breakthroughs in our relationships if we ask Him for help.
The Bible shares stories upon stories focusing on the importance of real relationships – 1st with God then 2nd with others!
Scripture Texts:
Acts 2:42-47 New International Version (NIV)
The Fellowship of the Believers
42 They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. 43 Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. 44 All the believers were together and had everything in common. 45 They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. 46 Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, 47 praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.
Ephesians 3:16, NIV
“I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being,”
??Another NIV version words it this way – “I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit.” – Ephesians 3:16, NIV 2nd???? ????????????
Introduction:
Quote Dr. Smalley: “LIFE IS RELATIONSHIPS; THE REST IS JUST DETAILS. THIS IS THE GREATEST TRUTH. EVERYTHING IN LIFE THAT TRULY MATTERS CAN BE BOILED DOWN TO RELATIONSHIPS.”
Dr.’s Les and Leslie Parrot from their book Relationships says this about our crucial subject: “Recently a pioneering band of researchers studied the age-old mystery of what people happy. Their answer is not what you might expect. What appears consistently at the top of the charts is not success, wealth, achievement, good looks, or any of those enviable assets. The clear winner is relationships. Close ones. Nothing reaches so deeply into the human personality, tugs so tightly, as relationships. Why? For one reason, it is only in the context of connection with others that our deepest needs can be met. Whether we like it or not, each of us has an unshakable dependence on others. It’s what philosopher John Donne was getting at when he said so succinctly, “No man is an island” We need camaraderie, affection, love. These are not options in life, or sentimental trimmings; they are part of our species survival kit. We need to belong” (Parrot page 11).
By the way this is why God created the Church – He created it for the development of Relationships – to verify this statement all you need to do is read the book of Acts read the OT and NT and it becomes crystal clear - the Church was established by Jesus to create connection with God and with each other – It’s all about relationships – Yes, it’s primary purpose of church - it is about developing deeper and more meaningful relationships with God and with each other. It’s about doing life together – helping each other - Fellowshipping with each other – connecting with each other.
Exercise for Church: The 1 minute moment of silence remembering – picturing the relationships of your past that have created and shaped who you are today!
! Minute of silence and reflection!
T.S. - So, it’s imperative we cultivate healthy and whole relationships if we want breakthrough in 2020 – So here are a few ways you can improve the likelihood of having a breakthrough in your relationships in 2020 as modeled for us by Mr. Rogers.
Opening points to sermon: Lessons from Mr. Rogers:
History of Fred Rogers from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fred_Rogers#Personal_life
Born in Latrobe, Pennsylvania, near Pittsburgh, Rogers earned a bachelor's degree in music from Rollins College in 1951. He began his television career in 1951 at NBC in New York. He returned to Pittsburgh in 1953 to work for children's programming at NET (later PBS) television station WQED. After graduating from Pittsburgh Theological Seminary, he became a Presbyterian minister in 1963 and attended the University of Pittsburgh's Graduate School of Child Development, where he began his 30-year long collaboration with child psychologist Margaret McFarland. He also helped develop the children's shows The Children's Corner (1955) and Misterogers (1963). In 1968 he created Mister Rogers' Neighborhood, which ran for 33 years. The program was critically acclaimed for focusing on children's emotional and physical concerns, such as death, sibling rivalry, school enrollment, and divorce.
Fred Rogers died of stomach cancer on February 27, 2003, at the age of 74. His work in children's television has been widely lauded, and he received over 40 honorary degrees and several awards, including the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 2002 and a Lifetime Achievement Emmy in 1997. He was inducted into the Television Hall of Fame in 1999. Rogers influenced many writers and producers of children's television shows, and his broadcasts have served as a source of comfort during tragic events, even after his death.
Rogers met Sara Joanne Byrd (called "Joanne") from Jacksonville, Florida, while attending Rollins College. They were married in 1952 and remained so for 50 years, until his death in 2003. They had two sons, James and John. Joanne was "an accomplished pianist", who like Fred earned a bachelor's from Rollins, and went on to earn a master's degree in music from Florida State University. She performed publicly with her college classmate, Jeannine Morrison, from 1976 to 2008. According to biographer Maxwell King, Rogers' close associates said he was "absolutely faithful to his marriage vows".
Rogers was red-green color-blind. He became a pescatarian in 1970, after the death of his father, and a vegetarian in the early 1980s, saying he "couldn't eat anything that had a mother". He became a co-owner of Vegetarian Times in the mid-1980s and said in one issue, "I love tofu burgers and beets". He told Vegetarian Times that he had become a vegetarian for both ethical and health reasons. According to King, Rogers also signed his name to a statement protesting wearing animal furs. Rogers was "a registered Republican", but according to Joanne Rogers, he was "very independent in the way he voted", choosing not to talk about politics because he wanted to be impartial.
Rogers was a Presbyterian, and many of the messages he expressed in Mister Rogers' Neighborhood were inspired by the core tenets of Christianity. Rogers rarely spoke about his faith on air; he believed that teaching through example was as powerful as preaching. He said, "You don't need to speak overtly about religion in order to get a message across". According to writer Shea Tuttle, Rogers considered his faith a fundamental part of his personality and "called the space between the viewer and the television set 'holy ground'". But despite his strong faith, Rogers struggled with anger, conflict, and self-doubt, especially at the end of his life… King called him "that unique television star with a real spiritual life", emphasizing the values of patience, reflection, and "silence in a noisy world". King reported that despite Rogers' family's wealth, he cared little about making money, and lived frugally, especially as he and his wife grew older. King reported that Rogers' relationship with his young audience was important to him. For example, since hosting Misterogers in Canada, he answered every letter sent to him by hand. After Mister Rogers' Neighborhood began airing in the U.S., the letters increased in volume and he hired staff member and producer Hedda Sharapan to answer them, but he read, edited, and signed each one. King wrote that Rogers saw responding to his viewers' letters as "a pastoral duty of sorts".
The New York Times called Rogers "a dedicated lap-swimmer", and Tom Junod, author of "Can You Say ... Hero?", the 1998 Esquire profile of Rogers, said, "Nearly every morning of his life, Mister Rogers has gone swimming". Rogers began swimming when he was a child, at his family's vacation home outside Latrobe, where they owned a pool, and during their winter trips to Florida. King wrote that swimming and playing the piano were "lifelong passions" and that "both gave him a chance to feel capable and in charge of his destiny", and that swimming became "an important part of the strong sense of self-discipline he cultivated". Rogers swam daily at the Pittsburgh Athletic Association, after waking every morning between 4:30 and 5:30 A.M. to pray and to "read the Bible and prepare himself for the day". He did not smoke or drink. According to Junod, he did nothing to change his weight from the 143 pounds he weighed for most of his adult life; by 1998, this also included napping daily, going to bed at 9:30 P.M., and sleeping eight hours per night without interruption. Junod said Rogers saw his weight "as a destiny fulfilled", telling Junod, "the number 143 means 'I love you.' It takes one letter to say 'I' and four letters to say 'love' and three letters to say 'you'"
Video Illustrations: Mr. Rogers Movie: A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood (2019) Based on the true story of a real-life friendship between Fred Rogers and journalist Tom Junod.
4 Clips to Highlight the message of Breakthrough in Relationships – Lessoms from Mister Rogers:
• Trailer for movie
• The life of Mr. Rogers impacted 1,000 of people! If not 100,000? Mr. Rogers was devote Christian man who made a difference for the Kingdom of Heaven.
o Galatians 6:9-10: Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.
o 2 Thessalonians 3:13: And as for you, brothers, never tire of doing what is right.
• Mr. Roger’s calls Reporter (Lloyd Vogel)
• The person you are talking with at the moment should be the most important person in your life in that moment. This is a key to developing healthy and whole relationships.
o Romans 12:10: Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.
o 1 Peter 1:22: Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart.
o Philippians 2:3-4: Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
• Reporter (Lloyd Vogel) speaks with Mr. Roger’s Wife about her husband.
• What’s it’s like being married to a saint? I don’t like that word she says – “He is not perfect” – but he does things to seek to improve everyday – he swims – He reads Scripture – he prays for people by name – he writes letters every day to people!
o Romans 3:23: For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,
o Romans 3:10: As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one.”
o Ephesians 4:32: Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
o Colossians 3:12-14: 12Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
• Discussion at lunch with Reporter (Lloyd Vogel) and Mr. Roger’s
• You are not broken! Your life with your father shaped who you are today! Forgive him! Lets be silent for 1 minute and listen to our heart.
o Psalm 51:17: The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart…
o James 1: 2-5: 2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
Points to ponder: We need to seek and know God’s truth (we are made to be connected to each other and the Lord) so we need to develop the skills to guide us in having meaningful healthy relationships!
1. We need to commit to growing in our relationship skills and see our relationships through God’s intended design for relationships.
a. Many people will seek to improve their job skills, higher education skills in academics and talents. But few will seek to develop their interpersonal relationship skills today.
i. The Result is broken relationships, strained relationships, divorce, no community involvement, isolation, split churches, division in families and broken homes.
b. The three key relationships in your life according to Dr. Gary Smalley are:
i. With God
ii. With Others
iii. With Yourself
1. See diagrams in power point: ?
a. The different diagrams show what happens if one of these is out of balance!
2. Walk through the diagrams and explain why you added God (spirit), Self (soul) and Others (body).
a. We are designed by God for 3 kinds of relationships! This DNA feature is implanted in all of us by God whether we acknowledge it or not!
b. See diagram from power point:
c. Many people don’t really understand how they’re in relationship with all three: Problems arise if any one of these relationships is blown out of proportion or minimized out of proportion:
? Problem 1: When “Self” is either blown up or miniature it impacts our view of self: Warning if your view of self is distorted it will distort the view of others and God.
? Problem 2: When people try to erase “God” out of their relationships it creates a huge problem – because this too will distort your view of self and others. There are some who say they don’t have a relationship with God in our world today --- but they do even if they deny they do.
? Problem 3: When we minimize “Other” relationships or blow them out of proportion this too will distort the other two relationships and cause us problem in these three relationships.
1. Note: A Christian theology, the tripartite view (trichotomy) holds that humankind is a composite of three distinct components: body, spirit, and soul which I adhere too. Here are some of the texts which seem to distinguish between the soul and the spirit, which lead Christians to hold that man has three parts — not only the body and soul, but the body, soul, and spirit [1 Thess. 5:18; Heb. 4:12; 1 Cor. 14:14].
i. Scripture:
ii. 1 Thess. 5:23: May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.
iii. Hebrews 4:12: For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double–edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.
iv. Romans 8:16: 16The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.
v. 1 Cor. 14:14-17: 14For if I pray in a tongue, my spirit prays, but my mind is unfruitful. 15So what shall I do? I will pray with my spirit, but I will also pray with my mind; I will sing with my spirit, but I will also sing with my mind. 16If you are praising God with your spirit, how can one who finds himself among those who do not understand£ say “Amen” to your thanksgiving, since he does not know what you are saying? 17You may be giving thanks well enough, but the other man is not edified.
vi. Got Questions https://www.gotquestions.org/trichotomy-dichotomy.html - notes this about how man relates to others in relationships The Spirit and Soul and The Spirit Soul and Body:
1. “While there are Bible verses that use the terms soul and spirit interchangeably (Matthew 10:28; Luke 1:46–47; 1 Corinthians 5:3; 7:34), other biblical passages do not present the soul and the spirit as precisely the same thing. There are also passages that hint at the separation between the soul and spirit (Romans 8:16; 1 Thessalonians 5:23; Hebrews 4:12). Hebrews 4:12 states, “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit.” This verse tells us two things: (1) there is a dividing point between the soul and spirit, and (2) the dividing point is only discernible to God. With all of these verses in mind, neither the dichotomous or trichotomous interpretations can be explicitly proved.”
d. The DNA of Relationships: “What is the DNA of relationships? It is simply the genetic relationship code with which we were created. It’s our relational hardwiring.” From The DNA of Relationships (p. 9). Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.. Kindle Edition. The following points are gleamed and quoted from his book.
i. He states, “Here are some biblical and basic information we need to know about the DNA of relationships – God created us to be in relationships with each other and with Him.”
ii. Smalley notes, “You are created to need relationships. You are made with the capacity to choose.”
1. “You can’t always choose your relationships, but you can choose how you will act in those relationships.”
a. Will you choose to forgive or hate?
b. Will you choose to break off relationships or mend relationships?
i. Did you hear this – you can choose how to react in a relationship – you can choose to run away from a relationship or heal a relationship!
e. Smalley summary from sermon 1 on relationships highlight points from last week and then focus on , “Put yourself in the picture.”
i. “When you see yourself in the same “frame” as the other person, you begin to see yourself as part of the problem as well as part of the solution.”
ii. This is all about empathy for others!
1. Kaitlyn from her book shares another study by Phillips states, “In 2018 a corporate psychological assessment company called PsychTests.com measured the self-reported empathy of more than nine thousand people. Then, a group of researchers compared those scores with the respondents’ performance level in thirty-one different abilities. The people who scored higher in empathy also scored much higher in reading body language, conflict-resolution skills, resilience, and standing by their values. “If there is one emotional intelligence skill that we would recommend developing, it’s definitely empathy,” Ilona Jerabek, president of PsychTests, said at the time. “Empathetic people are happier, more self-aware, self-motivated, and optimistic. They cope better with stress, assert themselves when it is required, and are comfortable expressing their feelings. There was only one scale where non-empathetic people scored higher: Need for Approval.”
a.
2. Empathy – is a skill we need to learn if we want healthy relationships.
a. Share the story line form Monk the TV show and the episode of “Monk goes to the Circus.”
f. He also notes, “Get God’s lens for a healthy view of your relationships.”
i. “Only when you see your relationships through an accurate lens—God’s lens—can you see others as he sees them and see yourself as he sees you. That lens is the basis for healthy relationships.”
1. From The DNA of Relationships (p. 16). Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.. Kindle Edition.
2. While persevering and working hard are keys for a breakthrough in your relationships, working hard is not enough we need God’s help.
a. You need to be working hard in the right ways and yes with the right skills- but you must have a mindset which allows the Holy Spirit to teach you through your relationships.
i. We must be guided by The Holy Spirit if we want a relationship breakthrough.
1. Listen carefully - If you are doing the wrong things, it doesn’t matter how long or how hard you do those things it will never heal or restore a relationship.
a. John 8:31-32, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
b. James 1:25, “But whoever looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues in it—not forgetting what they have heard, but doing it—they will be blessed in what they do.”
i. So, if you want a relationship and spiritual breakthrough, you have to know the truth and then work hard to obey the truths revealed by the Holy Spirit.
b. If you want a relationship breakthrough, maybe you need to address some of your character issues that are hindering your ability to interact well with others.
i. How can you correct this?
1. Be honest with yourself – listen to the Holy Spirit
a. You have to let the Word of God convict and correct you and then work on those areas with God’s help.
i. Do you want a spiritual breakthrough?
1. Then quit believing unbiblical lies of: unforgiveness – I can choose to not forgive her! I am done with this relationship because they did something I did not like!
2. You have to first know the truth, believe the truth, and then obey the truth. If you do this then you will eventually experience the spiritual breakthrough you seek.
ii. We must seek the Lord with all of our heart if we want to see a relationship and spiritual breakthrough.
1. 2 Corinthians 3:16-17 states, “But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.”
2. Jeremiah 29:13 explains, “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”
a. One author stated, “When we seek the Lord with all of our being, he will open the doors he wants open and he will close the doors he wants closed. But whether we receive the breakthrough we want or not, when we are fully connected to God we will have everything we really need. Without God no breakthrough will be truly a breakthrough. The greatest breakthrough of all is when we finally realize God is the ultimate treasure we need (for relationships breakthroughs).” https://applygodsword.com/3-ways-to-have-a-relationship-breakthrough/
Conclusion:
Gary Smalley states:
“The truth is, we do have a choice.” Actually we have lots of choices in our relationships.
• Will you choose to stay stuck in a relationship—or will you determine to work through the problem areas?
• Will you choose to hold on to your resentment—or will you choose to face that resentment and find freedom from it?
• Will you choose to hurt the other person when he or she hurts you—or will you choose to look beyond the hurt to the deeper problem—possibly one in yourself?
• Will you choose to run when a relationship gets sticky—or will you choose to honor the relationship by facing the problem?
• Will you choose to look at yourself through a distorted lens—or will you choose to see yourself as God sees you?
In counseling people from across the country, I am constantly amazed at how powerful it is when a person makes a choice.” The DNA of Relationships (p. 13). Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.. Kindle Edition.
Smalley adds, “Life is relationships; the rest is just details. God made you for relationships. You can’t change that. You can work either with or against this DNA, but you can’t choose whether it exists. The only choice you have is whether you will work to make those relationships great or allow them to cause you—and others—great pain.” The DNA of Relationships (p. 15). Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.. Kindle Edition.
Question: What do we need to know from this message?
Answer: Our culture and society is becoming less and less relational and the cry of loneliness is increasing as church attendance is decreasing.
Question: What do we need to do in light of this trend?
Answer: Therefore, we have to work at being more relational with each other – learn relationship skills – we need to work on connecting with each other face to face.
Question: Why do we need to do this?
Answer: If we don’t change and seek to connect with each other and with God we will just become more and more lonely, more and more depressed and more isolated and this leads to greater societal problems.
