Introduction:
A. If your tongue has ever gotten you into trouble, then please raise your hand.
1. Turn to your neighbor and say, “I’m not surprised!”
2. We are not surprised, because it happens to all of us.
3. All of us have had the experience of saying something, and then wishing we had not said it!
B. I heard the story of a man who worked at a produce department of a grocery store.
1. A woman came up and asked if she could buy half a head of lettuce.
2. It had been one of those days, and before he could think he replied, “Half a head? Are you serious? God grows these in whole heads and that’s how we sell them!”
3. The lady responded, “You mean that after all the years I have shopped here, you won’t sell me half-a-head of lettuce?”
4. “Look,” he said, “If you like I’ll ask the manager.” She indicated that would be appreciated.
5. So, the man marched away to find the manager and when he found him and said, “You won’t believe this, but there’s a lame-brained idiot of a lady back there who wants to know if she can buy half-a-head of lettuce.”
6. As he was saying that, he noticed that the manager was trying to subtly stop his outburst.
7. The crazed employee turned around to see the lady standing behind him.
a. Unbeknown to him, she had followed him as he searched for the manager.
8. But without skipping a beat, the employee said to the manager, “And this nice lady was wondering if she could buy the other half of the head of lettuce.”
9. Later in the day the manager cornered the young man and said, “That was the finest example of thinking on your feet I’ve ever seen! Where did you learn that skill?”
10. The man replied, “Well, I grew up in Grand Rapids, and if you know anything about Grand Rapids, you know that it’s known for its great hockey teams and its ugly women…”
11. The manager interrupted him, “Hey, my wife is from Grand Rapids!”
12. The employee quickly asked, “And which hockey team did your wife play for?”
C. Oh, how our tongues get us into trouble!
1. If my mother said it once, she said it a thousand times, “THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK!”
2. Every day, you and I speak thousands of words.
3. That is a lot of opportunity for us to say the wrong thing, am I right about it?
D. As we begin chapter three of James, we notice that he devotes most of this chapter to the tongue and its implication for Christians.
1. As you know from our study thus far, James has been intent on helping us see the implications that our faith should have on our lives.
2. Last time we discussed the important truth that a faith that saves is more than just something you say, feel or think, rather it is something you DO.
3. As we learn to do our faith, James has already shown us that our faith should impact the way we endure our trials, and the way we overcome our temptations.
4. He has already pointed out that because of our faith we should have a handle on our anger, and our propensity toward prejudice and favoritism.
5. James has summarized what God expects from us saying that, “Pure and undefiled religion before God the Father is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself unstained from the world.” (James 1:27)
E. Now in chapter three, we notice that James returns to the subject of the tongue.
1. Back in chapter one he introduced the topic in two verses.
2. James 1:19, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger…”
3. James 1:26, “If anyone thinks he is religious without controlling his tongue, his religion is useless and he deceives himself.”
4. James wants us to understand just how destructive and nullifying the tongue can be.
5. The negative influence of the tongue can override an otherwise godly life.
6. So, let’s see what points James makes in chapter three about the tongue, and then let’s work on some practical steps for taming the tongue.
I. James’ Pronouncements About The Tongue
A. James makes three pronouncements about the tongue here in chapter three.
B. First, James says that the TONGUE IS SMALL, BUT POWERFUL.
1. James wrote: 3 Now if we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we direct their whole bodies. 4 And consider ships: Though very large and driven by fierce winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. 5 So too, though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things. Consider how a small fire sets ablaze a large forest. (James 3:3-5)
2. In those verses, James perfectly illustrates his point with three common realities.
3. First, James reminds us of the fact that very large horses are controlled by a very small bits.
a. As you know, horses are incredibly powerful, many of them weigh about 2000 pounds.
b. Yet, even a small child can control and direct a horse by the small bit that is placed in a horse’s mouth and is connected to the reigns.
c. The secret of the bit is the fact that it is placed in one of the horses most sensitive places.
d. Have you ever had a small child put a finger or two in your mouth and tug? It hurts!
e. That’s the principle of the bit.
4. The second picture that illustrates James’ point is that large ships are steered by a small rudders.
a. People who have been involved with the Navy know all about ships.
b. Some of you have been on cruise ships.
c. These boats are floating cities, hundreds of feet long, thousands of tons, yet they are steered by a small rudder in comparison to their size.
5. The third picture James wants to come to our minds when we think of the tongue is that fact that a small spark can start a large fire.
a. Fortunately, our climate here in CNY is wet enough that we don’t experience too many forest fires.
b. This year out West there are dozens of fires currently burning causing hundreds of thousands of dollars of damage.
c. They may start by one careless cigarette tossed out the window of a passing car, or by one strike of lightening.
d. This truth is captured in the old camp devotional song: “it only takes a spark to get a fire going!”
6. So, what is James’ point?
a. The tongue is only a small part of the body, but it can cause big trouble!
7. Pound for pound, the tongue is very small, but it is oh so powerful.
C. Secondly, James says that the TONGUE IS UNCONTROLLABLY DANGEROUS.
1. James wrote: 6 And the tongue is a fire. The tongue, a world of unrighteousness, is placed among our members. It stains the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. 7 Every kind of animal, bird, reptile, and fish is tamed and has been tamed by humankind, 8 but no one can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. (3:6-8)
2. For this point, James again returns to the illustration of fire - it only takes a small spark to start a fire, but once a fire gets going it is almost impossible to stop – it is uncontrollable.
a. From 2007 – 2017, wild fires in the U.S. burned up 6.2. million acres a year.
b. Fire is so hard to control.
3. Next, James mentions the fact that we have tamed many kinds of wild animals, and we all enjoy seeing them at the circus. Whether it is the tigers, or the elephants.
a. He said that, we can tame them, but no human being can tame the tongue.
b. James says that it is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.
c. With that, I picture a poisonous snake on the loose – you don’t try to control a rattlesnake, rather you run from it.
4. The tongue is uncontrollably dangerous, it can set the whole course of a person’s life on fire.
5. It can and does destroy – reputations, families, and futures.
D. The third pronouncement that James makes about the tongue is the TONGUE IS TERRIBLY INCONSISTENT.
1. James wrote: 9 With the tongue we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in God’s likeness. 10 Blessing and cursing come out of the same mouth. My brothers and sisters, these things should not be this way. (James 3:9-10)
2. How tragic it is that we can be using our tongue to praise God in worship, and then 10 minutes later we can be using our tongue to demoralize our child in the car, or we can be criticizing or gossiping about someone in the congregation.
a. Our tongues are terribly inconsistent, but James declares “My brothers and sisters, this should not be!”
3. Then he asks a couple of rhetorical questions: 11 Does a spring pour out sweet and bitter water from the same opening? 12 Can a fig tree produce olives, my brothers and sisters, or a grapevine produce figs? (James 3:11-12)
a. What are the answers to those questions? Everyone say: “Of course not, silly!”
b. We all know that the same spring doesn’t produce sweet water sometimes and bitter water at other times, or fresh water sometimes and salt water at other times.
c. And we know that apple trees don’t bear oranges, and visa versa.
4. James’ challenge for us is to be more consistent with our tongues.
5. If we are going to be God’s people then the output or fruit of our tongues needs to be consistently godly and good.
E. In summary, these are James’ pronouncements about the tongue, and we all would agree that our experience is consistent with his assessment.
1. The tongue is small, but powerful.
2. The tongue is uncontrollably dangerous.
3. And, the tongue is terribly inconsistent.
F. How should we respond to this reality?
1. Should we give up and give into the negative power of the tongue? Of course not.
2. God wants us to learn to tame the tongue, and with His help we can.
3. Why else would God give us so many commands in other parts of the Bible about proper speech if there is not the possibility that we can learn to control our tongues?
II. God’s Plan For Taming The Tongue
A. We could spend a lot of time in this lesson dwelling on all the bad things we have said and how we have hurt others with our words, but that would be unprofitable.
1. What we need to do is to focus on how we can do better in the future.
2. So, let’s spend the final few minutes of this sermon, thinking about the proper and improper uses of the tongue.
B. First, Avoiding the Improper Use of the Tongue
1. Paul taught in Eph. 4:29, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs.”
2. So, what kinds of things should we avoid?
3. First, We should avoid profanity and vulgar speech.
a. This is one area where we can really stand out in contrast with the world around us.
b. Everyday speech has become so filthy and people’s vocabulary so limited - F bombs are people’s only adverbs and adjectives.
c. I like what “Peanuts” cartoonist Charles Shultz said on this point, “I have a strong dislike for vulgar phrases and find that terms like “good grief” and “rats” will cover virtually anything that happens.”
d. I played basketball for years with a group of guys, and they called me “Preach.” I remember them laughing so hard at me one day when I got really frustrated at what happened in the game and shouted: “RATS!!!”
4. Second, We should avoid complaining and arguing.
a. This is one of those things that God really detests.
b. Listening to some people you would think that complaining and arguing are sports you can win a metal in or letter in. You know what I mean?
c. Paul wrote, “Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe…” (Phil. 2:14-15)
5. Third, We should avoid gossip and slander.
a. Prov. 29:19 says, “A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much.”
b. So much damage is done in the church when people talk about others.
c. I think this is one of Satan’s most effective tools to destroy the church.
d. Before we say anything about anyone we should stop and ask ourselves: “Why am I about to talk about this person?”
6. Fourth, We should avoid lying. I don’t think I need to say much about that.
7. Fifth, We should avoid negative speech that criticizes and tears people down.
a. There is a time for correction and constructive criticism, but it must be approached wisely and with a lot of love and gentleness.
C. So, now that we have covered the things to avoid, let’s consider the proper uses of the tongue?
1. First, We can use our tongue for praise, prayer, confession and thanksgiving.
2. Second, We can use our tongue for teaching others about the love of God and Word of God.
3. Third, We can use our tongue to encourage and build others up according to their needs.
a. Proverbs 25:11 says, “A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”
b. Prov. 12:25 says, “An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up.”
4. Fourth, We can use our tongue to bless our relationships.
a. We can learn how and when to say some of the most important short sentences, like:
1. “I love you.”
2. “Thank you.”
3. “I am sorry, please forgive me.”
4. “How can I help you?”
5. “Could you help me with this?”
Conclusion:
A. You might be thinking, “Okay, David, I know the wrong and right uses of the tongue, but the problem is I can’t control my tongue. Can you give me some help about the ‘How To’ of controlling my tongue?”
B. Here are a few things that I find helpful.
1. First, Be Asking God for Help.
a. God is the only One who can help us!
b. So, throughout the day, pray for the ability to control the tongue.
2. Second, Be Slow to Speak.
a. We need to delay our response, even for a few seconds.
b. This will give us a few seconds to weigh our words and consider their impact.
c. Here is an acronym that I came across: T-H-I-N-K. Think before you speak.
T – is it True? H – Is it Helpful? I – Is it Inspiring? N – Is it Necessary?
K – Is it Kind?
d. I read about one person who was not allowed to talk for 6 months, and so all their communication had to be written on paper.
1. The person reported that so much was left uncommunicated because the process of having to put it on paper caused them to see how unimportant or hurtful it was.
a. Solomon says, “He who holds his tongue is wise.” (Prov. 10:19)
b. Someone said, “There is nothing wrong with having nothing to say; unless you say it!”
c. And the old saying is true, “Keep your words as sweet as possible, because you may have to eat them.”
3. Third, Have Heart Surgery if Necessary.
a. Jesus taught, “For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.” (Mt. 12:34; 15:19)
b. If we don’t want awful stuff coming out of our mouths, then we need God’s help to get the awful stuff out of our hearts, or not put it there in the first place.
c. The good news is that Jesus specializes in heart surgery and heart transplants.
4. Finally, Remember We Will Meet Our Words in the Judgment.
a. Jesus said, “But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Mt. 12:36-37)
b. That kind of warning should be enough to cause us to pause and think about our words before we say them, don’t you think?
C. As we bring this sermon to a close, let me share a story.
1. There was a philosopher named Xanthus who once told his servant that the next day he would be entertaining friends for dinner and that the servant should get the best thing at the market to serve for dinner.
2. So, the next day when the philosopher and his guests sat down at the table, they were served four or five courses of tongue cooked in different ways.
a. The philosopher was a little frustrated and confronted his servant, saying: “Didn’t I tell you to get the best thing in the market to serve?”
b. The servant replied: “I did get the best thing in the market. Isn’t the tongue the organ of sociability, the organ of eloquence, the organ of kindness, and the organ of worship?”
3. Then Xanthus said: “Tomorrow I want you to get the worst thing in the market to serve me for dinner.”
a. The next day, Xanthus sat at the table and was served four or five courses of tongue.
b. The philosopher was frustrated and again confronted his servant: “Didn’t I tell you to get the worst thing in the market to serve me?”
c. The servant replied: “I did; for isn’t the tongue the organ of blaspheme, the organ of defamation, and the organ of lying?” (The Tale of the Tardy Oxcart, Charles Swindoll)
4. Let’s always keep in mind that the tongue can be the very best thing or the very worst - that the tongue has the power for much good or much evil – the power of life and death.
a. I’m so thankful for God’s grace when I fail to use my tongue properly!
b. And I’m so thankful for God’s assistance and power to tame my tongue!
D. Perhaps this sermon has caused each of us to realize that we need to do something positive with our tongues.
1. Maybe we need to ask God for help.
2. Maybe we need to make a confession and ask God or others for forgiveness.
3. Maybe we need to express thanksgiving to the Lord for something.
4. Maybe we need to confess our faith in Jesus and be baptized into Him.
5. If you need to recommit your life to Christ, or commit your life to Christ for the first time, then you can come forward as we stand and sing.
