For example...
1. WE SEE ANGER IN OUR HOMES.
We see much anger about significant and insignificant things. Some people have so much anger inside them there is nothing anyone could do to please them.
Illus: This reminds me of the husband who was always angry and hard to please. One morning his sweet wife was determined to do everything she could to please him. She asked what he would like for breakfast. He said, in a rough voice, “I want two eggs; one scrambled and the other sunny side up.” The loving wife cooked the eggs with as much loving and care as she could. She brought them to him with a loving smile. He took one look at the eggs and growled like an angry bear. She said, “Honey, darling, what is wrong?” He growled, “You scrambled the wrong egg.”
Seriously, we see anger in homes all over America.
• Husbands are angry with their wives and wives are angry at their husbands.
• Parents are angry with the children and the children are angry with their parents.
Not only do we see anger in homes in America, also...
2. WE SEE ANGER IN THE PUBLIC.
People do not even try to hide their anger in public anymore.
Illus: There is the story of the couple at the airport who arrived at the boarding gate just in time to see their plane take off. He was extremely angry as he yelled out at his wife and said, “If you weren’t so slow getting ready, we wouldn’t have missed our plane!” She angrily yelled back at him, “And if you hadn’t rushed me so, we would not have so long to wait for the next flight!”
Yes, we see anger in homes and in public. Also.
3. WE SEE ANGER IN THE BUSINESS WORLD.
Many times this is because of misunderstandings.
Illus: One lady sent a post card to a corn syrup company. She wrote, “I just want you people to know I have used three bottles of your corn syrup and the corn on my little toe is still growing.”
Wherever we turn these days we see an abundance of anger. Some ask, “Preacher, doesn’t the Bible say, ‘Be ye angry and sin not?” Yes it does. However we need to clarify the kind of anger the Bible is speaking about. There are things Christians are to be angry about, God would have us be angry at SIN, NOT the SINNER. For example. any Christian who knows anything about this Bible knows that abortion is a sin. But listen, it is WRONG to get so angry that we take the law in our hands and shoot abortionists.
4. WE SEE ANGER IN THE PUBLIC SCHOOLS.
Illus: On February 29, 2000 the news shot across this nation of two children who were playing on the playgrounds and the next day a six year old boy brought a gun and shot the girl in the neck and killed her.
We need to ask God to help us OVERCOME ANGER! How can we do that? First let us look at...
I. THE DEFINITION.
Webster’s dictionary says anger is, “That feeling of displeasure and hostility resulting from injury, mistreatment, or opposition.”
This is a problem we deal with from the CRADLE TO THE GRAVE.
Illus: We all have seen tiny babies become so angry they would try to burst your ear drums with their loud cries. Why? Because they felt they had been mistreated and they could not get up and punch anyone in the nose, so they make life miserable for us with their loud cries.
But, God intended that we learn to overcome anger as we grow older, and not become hostile when injured, mistreated, or opposed.
Not only is such anger sinful, it is also unhealthy. WHEN WE BECOME ANGRY OUR BODY PREPARES ITSELF FOR ACTION. For example, if someone walks up and slaps you, one of two things will happen.
A. You are going to control your emotional response.
Illus: This reminds us of the story of the boxer who was converted. Before he was converted he beat up everyone who got in his way. Then word got out that he had gotten religion. An opponent he had beaten up a number of times saw him and began to roll up his sleeves as he said, “Joe, I understand you got religion.” The converted boxer said, “Let’s put it this way; if you about to do what I think you are, you had better hope I have religion!”
Most of us, when we are mistreated, immediately respond with feelings of wanting to retaliate.
The healthiest thing we can do, when we have been mistreated, is control our emotions and not let them get out of hand.
The other thing that might happen if you are slapped is...
B. You are NOT going to control your emotional response.
When this happens, it becomes unhealthy for us. Why? If someone slaps your face and you do not control your emotions, glands will secrete hormones which in turn prepare your body for retaliation.
• Adrenaline pours into your system.
• Blood pressure increases.
• The blood increases its clotting ability.
• Muscles become tense.
• The digestive tract contracts.
All these things can lead to severe abdominal pain, angina pectoris, even serious coronary attack.
And, of course, it immediately destroys our testimony. God wants us to OVERCOME ANGER, so that we can have a strong testimony.
Illus: A pastor woke up one morning and everything that could go wrong went wrong. He had a speaking engagement and...
• He overslept.
• He cut his face as he hastily shaved.
• He banged his toe on the bedpost.
• He spilled coffee on his tie.
• He slammed the door on the cat’s tail on his way out.
• He backed over the trash can backing out of the driveway.
• And to make matters worse, as he was hurrying to keep his appointment, he was caught for speeding.
He was so angry with the way things were going that when the officer walked up to the car, he said, “This is the worst day of my life.” Then, to top things off, the officer said, “Sir, I understand how you feel. I used to have days like that until I became a Christian. Now sir, I will need to know your name and your profession.” Needless to say, the pastor was embarrassed to tell him that he was a minister of the gospel.
There is nothing so unbecoming to us, as Christians, as to reflect anger.
We have looked at THE DEFINITION of anger. Now let us look at.
II. THE DELIVERANCE.
We are told there are at least THREE different ways people deal with anger. Some...
A. Suppress it.
There used to be a program on television called “Star Treck.” One man, who was one of the main characters, was called, “Mr. Spock.” He was a tall man with pointed ears. He had come from another planet, and he was supposed to be void of emotions and because of this he was supposed to be better able to analyze situations and solve problems objectively. While others reacted emotionally to different crisis, he never did.
There are some who try to live their lives like this.
Illus: An example of this was Tom Landrum, coach of the Dallas Cowboys football team. This man was considered to be a man without emotions. That is, his team would score a touchdown and the crowds would go berserk, standing and yelling and screaming. Yet the camera showed over and over again as the cowboys scored touchdowns his expression seemed to say, “Why should I get excited. This is what I coached them to do. This is what I expect them to do!” The fact is, Tom Landrum was apathetic. He lacked emotion.
Some of us are better at controlling our emotions than others. Note, suppressing and controlling are not necessarily the same.
It is not healthy to suppress our feelings.
Illus: Have you ever attended a funeral and someone was sobbing uncontrollably and everyone is trying to figure out why that person is taking this so hard? When the deceased person was living they never showed any outward emotional concern about that person, but now, all of a sudden, he can not contain himself.
WHY IS THAT PERSON SO EMOTIONAL NOW?
Probably because he has suppressed his feelings about the deceased and now, at the funeral service, he can not contain himself because he knows now he will never again have the opportunity here to:
* Tell this person how much he loved him/her.
* Tell this person how much he admired him/her.
* Visit him/her.
* Put his arms around and hug him/her.
Listen, we are all emotional people, and it is not healthy when you shut up your emotions inside. It is not healthy!
It is not healthy to suppress bad feelings, and it is not healthy to suppress good feelings.
Illus: Our life is filled with little pleasures. For example, have you ever watched people sneeze. Basically there are two kinds of sneezers...
• Some feel a sneeze is coming and they will grab a hankie and throw it over their nose and somehow they manage to short circuit the sneeze and you can hardly hear it.
• Others, when they feel a sneeze coming, will grab the hankie and put it over their nose, but they do not short circuit the process. When they sneeze everyone in their area code hears them. These know how to enjoy life’s little pleasure of sneezing.
But some, when something emotional comes up, consider this as emotional fire that must be put out and they throw a wet blanket over their emotions and SUPPRESS IT.
Many do this in church services. Now we all know there are churches that thrive on emotions. In fact, if you took the emotion out of their service, there would not be a service. The preacher could jump up and say, “Hot Dog,” and the congregation would start clapping and hollering, jumping up and down and they will leave saying, “God really blessed this morning!”
Now we know how shallow these churches are and we do not want anything to do with that shallowness. However, many churches go to the other extreme. It is like having a church full of “Mr. Spocks.” They suppress their emotions.
Some of the people say, “Preacher, this morning, when we were in worship service I really felt like saying, ‘Amen,’ but I got a hold of myself and I suppressed that ungodly feeling.” Listen, the preaching of God’s Word should become so precious to them that they will not feel they have to SUPPRESS their feelings. Then others...
B. Express it.
Some SUPPRESS their feelings, but others will EXPRESS their joy in the Lord. They should be able to release their feelings.
Again there are two kinds of reactions. Some will...
1. Suppress, and express feelings.
Most of us live somewhat of a double life. That is, we have one face that the public sees, and another our family sees.
Illus: For example, perhaps a little old lady comes to church and everyone thinks she is an angel. She has been hurt by someone, but she smiles from ear to ear and everyone thinks this is truly a saint of God who can overcome anything. But, when she gets home she lets the resentment at the hurt come out. She begins to release her anger.
• She walks in and takes her coat off and throws it in the floor.
• She yells at the grandchildren, who had nothing to do with hurting her.
• She slams the cat up against the wall.
• She throws the dishes into the floor.
This is not the way God intended that we deal with anger.
Illus: Remember, it is easy to “Get up into the air, but coming down is what hurts!”
When people SUPPRESS and EXPRESS anger, this is being hypocritical.
The others...
2. Express feelings.
In fact, they are downright proud that they know how to get angry. They should be ashamed, because God, the Father, is certainly not pleased with the way they act sometimes.
Illus: These believe in getting things across by getting cross.
They want everyone to know they know how to express their anger. Some of them are quick to tell you, “When I have something to say, I say it to your face!” It makes us wonder sometimes, and we want to say, “Did your parents teach you that sometimes some things are best left unsaid.”
What most of us have discovered is that people like this might say how they feel to your face, then they will also say it behind your back.
Illus: This reminds us of the story of the lady who had company come for dinner. She really did not care about the people who were coming and she had fussed all day long about inviting these stupid people over to her house. When they all arrived and were sitting around the dinner table, this fussing mother now had a smile on her face, and she called on little Johnny to say the blessing because she and her husband were in such fowl moods they did not want to pray. Little Johnny said, “Mommy, I don’t know what to say?” The mother very piously said, “Johnny, just say what you have heard mama say.” So, Johnny said, “Oh Lord, I do not know why I invited these stupid people over for supper.”
Again, there SOME people who ARE ALWAYS SUPPRESSING THEIR ANGER AND SOME ARE ALWAYS EXPRESSING IT. But, the best way TO OVERCOME ANGER is to...
C. Confess it.
Tell God that you are angry. Quit trying to pretend you think He does not know. CONFESS IT.
I John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
John is addressing Christians. We generally take that verse our context and apply to lost people, but actually it was written to Christians.
Some people say, “Preacher, I am so angry about a hurt in my life I am ashamed for anyone to know how angry I am inside.”
Listen, you can play that little game with us, but you can not play it with God. God wants you to confess it because He knows how you have been hurt and of your anger. He wants you to CONFESS YOUR ANGER because He knows all about it.
God’s Word says, Eph. 4:26, “Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath.”
Have you noticed that when you are angry and go to bed at night, you toss and turn and can not sleep? DO YOU KNOW WHY THIS HAPPENS? It is because when you feel you have been mistreated in some way your body releases adrenaline, blood pressure is high, your stomach is tight, and your blood is clotting. You are hurting yourself physically. Some folks have not slept good for years. They have all this anger in their heart that has been constantly nagging away and their bodies are progressively getting in worse condition. The people they are angry with do not even know anyone is angry at them. They are sleeping and dreaming sweet dreams. Cathy Fussell tells how she is able to keep her anger under control.
Illus: She said, “I have found if I don’t have my quiet time each morning, I tend to lose my temper over insignificant things. Recently my son, Andrew, reminded me of the need for daily prayer. He had accidentally spilled his drink and I went into a tirade. Andrew ended my harsh words when he quietly asked, ‘Mom, did you forget to ask Jesus to help you be nice today?’” (Cathy Fussell, Apopka, FL, Today’s Christian Woman, “Heart to Heart.”)
Conclusion/Summary:
Fighting rush-hour traffic from suburban Maryland to Washington, D.C., can cause its share of near misses and irritating moments. One morning, a young lady darted her compact car from a side street into the stream of traffic immediately in front of a driver just a few car lengths ahead of me, forcing him to brake sharply. He avoided hitting her by inches and was obviously furious. Within seconds, traffic stopped at a red light, and I watched him pull up behind the offender, leap from his car, and stride angrily toward hers. Clearly, he intended to give her a royal bawling out. Seeing him coming, the very attractive young lady jumped from her car and ran to meet him--a big smile on her face! Before he could say one word or know what was happening, she had thrown her arms around him, hugged him tightly, and planted a passionate kiss on his lips! Then she was back in her car and driving away, leaving her antagonist standing in the middle of the street still speechless and looking somewhat confused and embarrassed--but no longer angry! (B.R. Holt, Caldwell, ID. Christian Reader, “Lite Fare.”)
Now I am not suggesting this is something we should do, but I am suggesting if we can control our anger, instead of letting our anger control us, we could be a lot more effective for the Lord and live longer and happier lives.
I. THE DEFINITION.
II. THE DELIVERANCE.
