A new joy – restore joy
During road trips we made up word games to pass the miles as the travel droned. One our favorite games was the prefix game. We pick a prefix and each of us took a turn, and it had to be a real-word, until somebody couldn’t think of one, and they were out. Think of “Mis-“. There would be: misunderstood, mistaken, misuse, and so on. Oh my gosh. This could go on and on, with none of us wanting to give up. The car would go quiet for 20-30 minutes … with us thinking the game had ended, when suddenly someone would yell something like “misaligned”, then everyone who had been holding a word in the back yelled their out, and start again. Luckily none of us had service in the middle of nowhere so we couldn’t cheat.
The there was “re-“, with: Relent, recoil, renew, and so on. When we got to rejoice, we’d have the debate, was that a pre-fix or not.
“re- “
Just two letters change the entire meaning of a word. When put at the front of a word, according to the dictionary, it is:
word-forming element meaning "back, back from, back to the original place;" also "again, anew, once more," also conveying the notion of "undoing" or "backward," etc. (see sense evolution below), c. 1200, from Old French re- and directly from Latin re- an inseparable prefix meaning "again; back; anew, against."1
Know that meaning, we debated if rejoice was a prefix word. Has anyone ever just “joiced”?
So when I thought about rejoicing this season, I was taken aback to the car game and all the other “re-“ words. And I look to see if there was ever a root to “joicing”. Turns out there is. “Joice” actually took root from the Latin word *gaudire, or the old French “Joir”, meaning bring gladness, or for a more basic meaning …. Well, “joy”.
So, to end the debate that raged for years in our car, all we needed to do was spend a little time in the giant un-abridged Dictionary we were all so familiar with in high school … or about 5 minute on “Google”.
“Re-“ is actually a prefix in that case, and rejoice means to restore joy, to make joy new again, or to bring it back.
So what exactly is joy? Does finding a $20 bill in an old pair of pants bring joy? Do presents spread joy? Is joy the same as happiness? Again, just a few minutes of online searching and you see a lot of people asked the exact same question.
When I asked, I found that answer in a Psychology Today blog where Psychologist Sandra Brown said:
“Many distinguish between joy and happiness by saying that joy is an inner attitude whereas happiness is a fleeting emotion based on circumstance. It is common to think of happiness as being dependent upon an experience or other external stimulus. When circumstances are positive, happiness results.
Happiness is external. It's based on situations, events, people, places, things, and thoughts. Happiness is connected to your hope for a relationship or your hope for a future with someone.
Joy comes when you make peace with who you are, where you are, why you are, and who you are not with. When you need nothing more than your truth and the love of a good God to bring peace, then you have settled into the abiding joy that is not rocked by relationships. It's not rocked by anything.” 2
…
I really like that… Joy and happiness are different. Happiness it that temporary feeling of pleasure. Some external incident brings some amount of positive feelings, but then decreases over time. Everyone says winning the lottery would bring them happiness, and that’s true. A lot of studies shown people are happy when winning large sums of money, but that happiness fades and they are back to normal levels of positivity.
Joy on the other hand is lasting. It is from within instead of from outside.
I had also read that Joy comes from connections to people while happiness is from momentary connections.
To prove that point, think about this example. When you put up a picture online and it receives positive feedback from a stranger, you get the momentary burst of dopamine. (Yes, they’ve actually measured it). It makes you happy. But that was only something momentary. The feeling fades as we wait for the next “like.” However, connections with a person with a lasting relationship brings a deeper happiness than the momentary “like”. It’s easily deeper in your soul than seeing a little heart or thumb with a numbers that count the clicks.
Can you really count those momentary meetings as friends, just because you are “friended”? Serotonin fades, but the feelings from lasting relationships doesn’t.
Dr. Pamela King, a developmental scientist, spent a lot of time analyzing joy and happiness. She understands that all parents want their children to grow up happy. But it’s truly joy that they should be seeking. She said joy involves our thoughts, feelings, and actions in response to what matters most in our lives, and is enduring.
She gave points on cultivating joy. Two of which are:
A. growing in depth of relationships and contributing to others
B. living more aligned with one’s ethical and spiritual ideals.3
That was a lot of talk about what joy is, and what happiness isn’t but where the truest joy come from? The word Joy or Joyful is in the Bible 186 times.
It’s stated pretty directly in Psalms 16:11 that joy comes from God. :
You will fill me with joy when I am with You
So now I think I understand the Re-joy. We had joy in the presents of God, and then we fell, there was no path back. But than came a change. Then came a way for us to experience Joy again. Then came the “REJOICE”.
And this is the season we celebrate with rejoicing.
Why?
Let me read from Luke chapter 2:
8 And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. 9 And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. 10 And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. 11 For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. 12 And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. 13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, 14 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.
Christ here on Earth. This is the turning point of human existence. This is the point at time is measured. All our history is marked before and after his arrival. What makes this event so tremendous is spelled out in John 3:16
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.
Now for a different angle, joy goes both ways. Earlier this week I was listening to the parable of the lost sheep.
Then Jesus told them this parable: 4 “Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Doesn’t he leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? 5 And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders 6 and goes home. Then he calls his friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.’ 7 I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.
When we think that rejoicing as a two-way street, it becomes more clear why when the angels spoke to the shepherds, they stated they brought tidings of great joy. It was joy for both. And then they were joined by heavenly host singing Glory to God in the Highest.
They themselves, all of Heaven was rejoicing. They were also celebrating that the Savior had arrived and now we could return home. Think of the father in the parable of the prodigal son. He rejoiced greatly at the return of his son.
We are truly God’s children. He wants us to grow with joy. Let me go back to what the developmental scientist, Dr King said; growing in depth of relationships and contributing to others.
Growing depth in relationships. We are commanded in John 13 where it says
34 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.
To love one another we need deeper relationships. This can’t be just the casual high at the store or the occasional text. This has to be a deep bonding. To love another as you love yourself. And like pointed out, its true connections that bring us joy.
Along with that bonding comes contributing to others.
Have you ever thought this is one of the reasons there are so many scriptures commanding us to help one another?
Deuteronomy 15:11 for example say:
11 For the poor shall never cease out of the land: therefore I command thee, saying, Thou shalt open thine hand wide unto thy brother, to thy poor, and to thy needy, in thy land.
And Matthew 5:16 say:
16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.
When we are helping others, we are bringing joy into our own hearts. This is so obvious. It feels good when we help others. That’s part of the joy the Lord is trying to bring into our lives.
What about Dr King’s other point? That living more aligned with one’s ethical and spiritual ideals also brings us joy?
Have you ever found yourself going way over the line and either hurting yourself or hurting others? Often times when we are pointing out the flaws of someone else, we’re actually projecting what we don’t like about ourselves.
I had read in an article that:
“Psychologists and clergy use the term ‘moral injury’ to describe the distress that we feel when our behavior fails to live up to our moral standards. And because most of us do fall short on occasion, most of us are familiar with that churning combination of guilt and shame and self-condemnation with a big hefty dose of defensiveness thrown in.”4
We all know when we’ve done wrong. We all know that we’ve hurt someone. It eats at us like a cancer. The article also said this disrupts our relationships with other. We can either become more embittered trying to self-justify what we’ve done. And if it’s interrupting our relationships with others, then it’s also hurting our relationship with our Savior. We can heal both them and ourselves when we finally align our behaviors to God’s teachings.
We all talk about the season. This is the season of Joy. It says so right in the song. “Joy to the world, the Lord is come”, which is based on Psalm 98:
Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth, burst into jubilant song with music
We are not fooled by all the commercials say it’s the presents bring happiness and Christmas Joy. But as we’ve seen; happiness fades. What we really get from the season is Joy. Much more deeper, long lasting, and spiritual than happiness. Joy that we get everlasting salvation. Now that’s joy.
Remember that when we light the Pink advent candle represents Joy
I bring you tidings of great Joy. For unto you a savior is born.
With him came the return to Joy
Or in OTHER words … REJOICE!
1. Online Etymology Dictionary; https://www.etymonline.com/word/retro-#:~:text=Entries%20linking%20to%20retro%2D&text=word%2Dforming%20element%20meaning%20%22back,or%20%22backward%2C%22%20etc.
2. Joy vs. Happiness; Sandra L. Brown, 12 /18/2012; M.A.; https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/pathological-relationships/201212/joy-vs-happiness
3. What Is Joy and What Does It Say About Us? An interview with Dr. Pamela King on the meaning and depth of joy July 28, 2020; https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/hope-resilience/202007/what-is-joy-and-what-does-it-say-about-us
4. When You Hurt Others, You Hurt Yourself Too (Maryann Jacobi Gray – Ted Talks) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xb-JneauRzs
