MELVIN M. NEWLAND, MINISTER
RIDGE CHAPEL, KANSAS, OK
(Revised: 2016)
(The PowerPoints used with this message are available for free. Just email me at mnewland@sstelco.com and request PP #112.)
TEXT: Song of Solomon 2:15
Today is known as Mother’s Day in the U.S., & for most of us it is a very special day. Telephone companies tell us that it is by far their busiest day of the year. It is a day for greetings & expressions of love. And it is also a day for remembering.
ILL. Someone wrote an interesting article entitled, “What My Mother Taught Me.”
What did my mother teach me? Well, she taught me a lot. For example, my mother taught me LOGIC - "If you fall off that swing & break your neck, you can’t go to the store with me."
My mother taught me MEDICINE - "If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they’re going to freeze that way."
My Mother taught me TO MEET A CHALLENGE - "What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you, & don’t you talk back to me!"
My mother taught me ANTICIPATION - "Just wait until your father gets home."
My Mother taught me HUMOR - "When that lawn mower cuts off all your toes, don’t come running to me."
My mother taught me about GENETICS - "You’re just like your father!"
My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT - "If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”
And her favorite subject was JUSTICE - "One day you’ll have kids, & I hope they turn out just like you. Then you’ll see what it’s been like. I can’t wait for that day to come!"
Well, maybe your mother wasn’t quite like that, but almost all of us have some very special memories about mother & home. And though my mother has been gone for 35 years now, I have so many precious memories of her.
A. Mother & home when you mention one you just automatically think of the other. And when most of us think of home we forget the bad things, & remember the good.
Those of us who are older remember the sounds & sights & smells of home, of screen doors banging in the summer time, the aroma of cookies just out of the oven, & of freshly baked bread.
Home - we enjoyed a sense of acceptance there, & of being loved. And no matter what anyone said, we knew mother loved us. We were certain of that.
But once we left home we found that the world is not as kind. It's always judging us & trying to place us into categories if we're good looking enough or smart enough or ambitious enough or successful enough. And if we don't measure up, then the world rejects us.
SUM. But still, there is home & mother. Unfortunately, home is not what it used to be. So perhaps we need to re-evaluate what is happening within the walls of the home, & in our family relationships.
B. There is a verse of scripture in the O.T. that I'm going to use as a text this morning. It is Song of Solomon 2:15. Here is what it says, "Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom."
That verse sounds rather strange, doesn't it? But I believe Solomon was simply saying that little things can often ruin or destroy the big & important things in life.
C. And I suggest that is exactly what is happening in many homes today. Little things are getting through the cracks & crevices of our homes, & they have been opening the way for its destruction.
ILL. Our great-grandmothers used to enjoy recalling what it was like when they were girls & great-grandfather came courting. That was back in the days when ladies wore dresses that reached to the floor & men wore spats & stiff collars & neat little ties.
Eventually he asked her to marry him. They were engaged for an appropriate length of time, & then became husband & wife. And they knew that no matter what happened, they were together through thick & thin, through good & bad, through sickness & health.
Whatever came their way, they were going to stick it out & face it together. And they raised their children to believe that way, too.
But somewhere along the way, little foxes started creeping in, & when you look at the modern picture of home, it is much different than the picture grandma painted.
D. Why? What has happened? What kind of input is coming into our homes? To help answer that, turn on the TV, & what do we see?
Now I know it is wishful thinking, but I think it would be great if we could return to the golden days of "Father Knows Best."
I realize there has probably never been a father as wise as Robert Young seemed to be, or a mother as totally in control as Jane Wyatt. And I'm sure there have never been children as obedient as theirs.
But I liked the program. We knew there was no home quite that perfect. But it always tried to set a good example, & I believe we need more programs like that.
When I sit down in front of the TV I want to see things the way they could be, or ought to be, an ideal to strive for, & not the depraved way things are usually pictured today.
PROP. Yes, a lot of little foxes have crept in & changed the modern picture of the family. As a result, today’s homes are often not what God intended them to be.
I. IDENTIFYING SOME OF THESE LITTLE FOXES
A. So let's identify some of these little foxes that are making havoc of our homes, & think about them. There are many more than we have time to discuss today, but here are 7, & I'll make only a brief comment about each one.
And, of course, most of them will probably not apply to you & your family. But one or more may. So let me share them with you.
1. First of all, there is the little fox of discourtesy. When great-grandma told of her courting days, great-grandpa came across as a gentleman. But today that seems to have changed.
The very word "courting" brings to mind other words such as “courtesy” & “courtliness”, reminding us of those times of obvious consideration & respect.
But it also brings to mind the legal system, for in the absence of simple courtesy in the home, the Divorce Court is often the inevitable result.
ILL. A few years ago someone suggested that marriage licenses should be issued on a 2 year renewable basis. Then at the end of 2 years, if you didn't renew it, the marriage was automatically dissolved.
Now we haven't accepted that idea yet, but I wonder how far away we are from it. The little fox of discourtesy opens the door for worse things to come.
2. Then there is the little fox of thoughtlessness. Do you realize how thought-less we oftentimes are? That is why we need special times like Mother's Day to jog our memories, so that we'll send flowers or make the phone call to tell mom we love her. Otherwise she might be forgotten in the jumble of our activities.
We're oftentimes rather thoughtless about the needs of others in the family.
3. The 3rd little fox is the little fox of preoccupation. Have you ever stopped to think how busy & preoccupied we are?
ILL. The story is told of a woman who moved from one city to another. A realtor offered to help her find a house. The woman replied, "I really don't need a house."
She said, "I was born in a hospital, educated in a college, & married in a church. I live out of a delicatessen & a paper bag.
"In the morning I go to work or to the golf course, spend my afternoons at the bridge table, & my evenings at the movies.
“And when I die, I'll be buried by the undertaker. I don't need a house. All I need is a garage."
Well, that story may be an exaggeration, but isn't it true that most of us are so busy that home just seems to be a checking in place to hang our hats for awhile?
4. Then there is the little fox of thanklessness. I think the phrase "thank you" probably ought to be used second only to "I love you" within the home.
"Thank you, mom, for all the meals you've prepared." "Thank you, mom, for cleaning the house & ironing my shirts." "Thank you, mom, for taking care of me & loving me & accepting me. Just thank you, mom."
But the words "thank you" are too often absent from our vocabulary, especially in the home. "Thank you, son, for emptying the garbage." "Thank you, daughter, for doing the dishes." "Thank you, dad, for bringing home the bacon." The words "thank you" ought to be used more & more within our home.
ILL. We are too much like the little boy who was given an orange. The boy’s mother asked, “What do you say to the nice man?” The little boy thought for a moment, held out the orange, & said, “Peel it.”
5. There are 2 more little foxes that are kissing cousins. One is called "nagging." I realize some suggest that this is the favorite indoor sport of the feminine gender. But I’ve known a few masculine “naggers” as well.
Nagging is often a part of our lives, isn’t it? If we don't get what we want, we just keep pressing & nagging until we either get it or we get beaned one of the two.
And you know what happens? The children, because they have master teachers, learn from mom or dad how to do it, & they also become naggers.
6. A kissing cousin to "nagging" is "criticism." You know, it is so easy to be critical of the people we love the most. Criticism & nagging go hand in hand, little foxes that make their way into the home.
7. One other little fox the lack of any spiritual emphasis in the home. For too many families, there is no longer any discernible recognition of God. How long has it been since you sat down with your family & talked about the things of God, & you prayed & shared from God’s Word together?
Men, the best Mother's Day present you could give your wives, is to become a spiritual leader in your home. That is your God-given responsibility, whether you acknowledge it or not.
II. OVERCOMING THOSE LITTLE FOXES
A. Well, we've looked at some of the little foxes. Now let's look, very quickly, at how to overcome them. These little foxes need to be eliminated, & probably everybody would rejoice if they were.
1. How can we overcome discourtesy & thanklessness? Why, simply by practicing courtesy, by learning to say "Please" & "Thank you," by opening doors for those who are dear to us, & letting them go before us.
2. How can we overcome thoughtlessness? By becoming more thoughtful, & not just on special days. Do you remember the bouquet of flowers & those little gifts that were so important during the days of courtship? Then give of yourself, & tell them over & over, "Thank you for who you are & what you mean to my life."
3. How can we overcome nagging & criticism? The Bible says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage & anger, brawling & slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind & compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:31-32)
ILL. It was testimony night in the church. A lady got up & said, "We are living in a wicked land where sin is on every hand. I have had a terrible fight with the old devil all week." Whereupon her husband, who was sitting glumly by her side said, "It’s not all my fault; she’s tough to get along with too."
The Bible says, “…encourage one another daily….” (Hebrews 3:13) And again, “Therefore encourage one another & build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
4. How can we overcome preoccupation? By becoming more concerned about others than we are with ourselves. Unplug the TV once in a while & talk to them & listen to what they say.
ILL. One day 5 prisoners sat looking at a magazine in the prison library. One said, “I wish my mother had a house like the one in that ad.” Another took the magazine & flipping through the pages, remarked, “I wish my ma had a car like that so she could come & see me once in a while.”
They passed it around until it came to a prisoner named “Bill.” Bill just sat there. Finally, he spoke, “I wish,” & his voice sounded as if it were going to break, “I wish that my mother had a good son.”
5. And finally, if you will give your heart to God & begin to place the emphasis on spiritual things in your home, I can guarantee you that this will be one of the very best Mother's Day that your family has ever had.
So let’s dedicate our homes to God, to His Spirit, & to His influence in our lives, & pledge that we will always love & respect & honor one another no matter what the world may say.
ILL. The story is told that after one of the battles of the Civil War, a chaplain came to a young man who was dying. He took the soldier’s hand & said, "Brother, what can I do for you?" The soldier replied, "Would you please return thanks for me?"
"Thanks for what?" asked the chaplain. The soldier replied, "Thank Him for my mother. Thank Him that because of her I’m a Christian.” (Evie Megginson - SC)
CONC. This morning there may be those here who need to decide for Christ, our Savior, who have never given their life or their home over to the saving power of Jesus Christ. We want you to know that He is here & that He is concerned about your home & your family & your loved ones.
He is also concerned about you as a Christian father or as a Christian mother or as a Christian young person. He wants to remold you & transform you & make you into the kind of person that only God can make.
So this morning, if you are here without Christ as your Savior, we extend His invitation. We invite you to come & accept Him as the Lord & Master of your life, be buried with Him in Christian baptism, & to walk in the new life that He has offered.
Whatever your need this morning, Jesus can meet that as we stand & sing.
INVITATION
