Mother’s Day was first officially observed in the United States in 1914. And ever since then, it has been the annual goal of candy makers, greeting card companies, florists, and restaurant owners to persuade you that the best way to show appreciation to your mother on her special day is to spend as much money as possible. According to them, what you need to do is buy her a big box of Malley’s chocolates; a frilly Hallmark card with a sappy poem inside (written by someone who has never even met your mother), an expensive flower arrangement; and dinner at a place where someone else does the dishes. At least, that’s how it used to be. Now, everybody’s getting into the act. So if you believe the ads in today’s Plain Dealer, you’ll find that you can also honor your mother by buying her a table saw, or a ratchet set from Sears. The gift of a new DVD player will fill her heart with maternal joy. You can express your deepest feelings through major appliances. There’s nothing like a Maytag washer and dryer to tell mom, "I love you".
Now, before I incur the wrath of those mothers in the congregation who may be hoping for a new microwave, or at least a flower or some bon-bons before the day is out, let me say that I have nothing against giving gifts to your mother, on this or any other day. I’m all for it. Certainly,no gift, however extravagant, could ever come close to compensating your mother for what she went through in birthing and raising you. A side-by-side refrigerator with an ice maker and a vegetable crisper is scant reward for a sixteen-hour labor. So, go ahead. Max out your credit cards! Buy mom that Miata she’s been wanting!
But here’s my point. Like many other things in American life, a day which started out as a way to celebrate spiritual values - love, devotion, sacrifice - has become almost overwhelmed with economic values. And what I’d like to do this morning is balance things out a bit. To focus more on what I think God had in mind when He said that we should "honor our father and mother". And the way we’re going to do that is to look at one aspect of what it means to be a godly mother. As we examine this character quality, I hope each of you will be stimulated to thankfulness for the way in which your mother lived it out. And I hope that those of you who are mothers will be encouraged to continue striving to exhibit this quality, that of humility.
Motherhood requires humility. It absolutely demands it. If nine months of pregnancy, and the ordeal of childbirth were not enough to convince you of that, then caring for an infant will make it painfully obvious. It is very difficult to maintain an sense of great self-importance while you are cleaning strained peas out of your hair. Pride can’t survive for long in the face of a two-year-old’s defiant contempt. Your inflated ego collapses as you confront this tiny creature whom you far exceed in size and power, and who by all rights ought to be bending to your will, but who instead opposes your authority with every fiber of his being.
Other adults may treat you with respect and deference. Your colleagues at work may be impressed by your titles, your awards, your accomplishments. But your children are not. They value your college degrees far less than your ability to sing all the songs from the "Barney" show. Your knowledge of tax law means nothing to them, compared to your knowledge of Pokemon characters. You could have a Nobel prize, or an Oscar, or the Congressional Medal of Honor - it would make no difference. In their eyes what really matters is that you can keep the yolk from breaking when you cook their eggs. In other contexts, you may be someone important, someone to be reckoned with; but to your children, you are just "mom".
And that’s a great gift. It’s not something to be resisted; it’s something to be welcomed. Because humility is the path to grace and blessing for all who follow Christ, not just mothers. Listen to what the Scriptures say about the value of humility:
"All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, ’God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’ Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time." - 1 Peter 5:5-6 (NIV)
"He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way." - Psalm 25:9 (NIV)
Do you want to receive God’s grace? Do you want God to lift you up and exalt you? Do you want God to teach you and give you wisdom? Then choose humility. In doing so, you won’t just be fulfilling your calling as a mother; you’ll also be honoring your calling as a disciple of Jesus Christ, who said,
"Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." - Matthew 11:29 (NIV)
Christ Himself is the model of our humility; the supreme example, not just for mothers, but for all of us to follow.
Now, I’m not claiming that humility is easy or natural, not even for mothers who love their children. Humility is difficult, because it requires a denial of self. It requires us to put the welfare of someone else ahead of our own needs and desires. But in motherhood, we have a living picture of humility that will help all of us to better understand what it means to follow Christ. As we observe the humility that mothers exhibit in caring for their children, we gain insight into the humility that God requires of each of us. Let me suggest three ways in which mothers are an example to us of this Christian virtue.
First, through service. Motherhood is perhaps the purest, most selfless kind of service there is. Because most of the time when you are serving someone, there’s something in it for you. Even if you’re not getting paid in cash, there’s some kind of compensation. The payoff may be thanks, and appreciation, and esteem. Or it may be the anticipation that they’ll do something nice for you in the future. Or at the very least, in most cases you know that the person you’re serving is capable of returning the favor in some way. But with children, it’s different. A baby can’t give you anything in return for changing its diaper, except maybe a squirt in the face while you’re doing it. An older child or a teenager can respond out of gratitude, but most of the time they don’t. How often during the day do you hear one of your children say, "thank you"? How often does one of your children volunteer to help you in some way? When it does happen, it’s a delightful surprise, a cause for rejoicing. And also a cause for suspicion if it’s near a birthday or Christmas. The bottom line is that there’s no guarantee these children you are caring for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, will ever repay you, with their thanks and appreciation, or with anything else. And anyone who chooses to raise a family with that kind of expectation is setting themselves up to be disappointed. Motherhood requires selfless service; service that is completely devoted to the welfare of another, without conditions, without expectation of any benefit to ourselves. Listen to what Christ says:
"When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous." - Luke 14:12-14 (NIV)
Humility means serving people selflessly, serving people who can’t repay you and who may not even thank you. That’s what Christ did, when he gave his life for us. That’s what mothers do, every day. And if you are a follower of Jesus Christ, that’s what you should do too.
Not only does motherhood involve selfless service, it requires menial service. It requires doing tasks that most people would consider unpleasant. No one dreams of a career blowing noses and wiping bottoms. No one looks forward to the joy of walking up and down the hallway at three in the morning, holding a screaming, colicky infant. This kind of service is not glamorous; it’s not fun. But it is part of being a mother. And it is also part of being a disciple of Christ. Because Christ-like service is not only selfless, it is also willing to do whatever is needed, even when it’s unpleasant or inconvenient. There was certainly nothing glamorous or pleasant about the cross. But it was necessary.
Second, humility involves sacrifice. Motherhood means giving things up. The first thing to go, after the pregnancy test comes back positive, is your appetite. That should have been a warning to you. The next thing to go is your figure. Maybe you’ll get it back, and maybe you won’t, but for the duration of the pregnancy, it’s gone. After the baby’s born, that’s followed by giving up sleep, giving up your freedom, giving up your time, giving up your dignity, giving up your discretionary income, and giving up any friends who can’t carry on a conversation with a baby screaming in the background. Take freedom as an example. Maybe before you had kids, you would spontaneously decide to go to the movies, or go to dinner. Or spontaneously decide to do other things that married couples do. No more. The baby’s schedule rules. And when the children are older, the Little League schedule rules, and the piano lesson schedule rules, and the ballet rehearsal schedule rules.
Here’s the dirty little secret of motherhood: you can’t really have it all. You can’t be a supermom, and a focused, driven career woman, and a Martha Stewart homemaker, and the head of the ladies’ missionary society at church, and an ideal wife, and the chairwoman of the PTA, all at the same time. The women you see on TV who do that have nannies, and maids, and personal assistants. Most of you do not. So motherhood means making choices. It means cutting out things that you would rather not cut out. It means making sacrifices. Mostly, it means giving up things you want for the sake of your children. It means sacrificing for the good of another. That takes humility. And again, it’s a Christ-like humility, because as the Scriptures tell us,
"even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." - Mark 10:45 (NIV)
When a Christian mother serves her children sacrificially, she is not just obeying her maternal instincts; she is obeying God. She is doing what Jesus did. She is actively following the example of her Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ. And she is also providing an example of humility for all of us non-mothers who seek to follow Christ.
Finally, humility means suffering. Humility means that we don’t consider ourselves as exempt from pain and sorrow; it means that we are willing to suffer for the sake of someone else. Mothers know what it is to suffer because of their children; and also for the sake of their children. And in doing so, they are following the example of Christ, who willingly suffered because of us and also for us:
"To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps." - 1 Peter 2:21 (NIV)
To the mothers here this morning, let me say, on behalf of your children, "thank you." It’s worth it, even when it seems like it’s not. Please continue to care for your children in humility, to serve them, and sacrifice for them, and suffer for them; knowing that God’s strength and power is always available to you for the asking. And to the rest of you, let me say "please consider the picture of Christian discipleship that faithful mothers give us, and follow their example as you follow Christ."
(For an .rtf file of this and other sermons, see www.journeychurchonline.org/messages.htm)
