Matthew 22:34-40
“If You’re Not Loving, You’re Not Living”
By: Rev. Kenneth Emerson Sauer, Pastor of Parkview United Methodist Church
What is “it”?
In any language, “it” is the most powerful expression of the most powerful emotion and experience in the
world.
“It”, of course, is “I love you.”
An old song says: “You’re nobody till somebody loves you.”
And if that is true...then everybody is somebody because God loves everybody!
Jesus opened our eyes to the true nature of love in Matthew chapter 22: “Love the Lord your God with all
your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second
is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”
Jesus plainly taught that God, in His love, created human beings.
Life does not precede love...
...love precedes life!
In this passage the Lord Jesus tells us about three directions for love...
...they are:...
....love toward God...
....love toward others....
....and love toward ourselves.
Our love for God is an upward love that must take priority over everything else.
God deserves all of our love...
...not only part of our love.
We should love nobody more than we love God.
As the Bible says: “God is love.”
The love of God is what gave us life in creation....
...The love of God is what sought us out and offers us salvation through faith in Christ.
Jesus taught that if love is to be fully manifested we must love God first, Others second, and Ourselves
Last.
Wow, how so many of us have got this completely backwards!
But God has it right!
If we love God, then our love for others will grow even greater...because this upward love supernaturally
produces a love for others...and then for ourselves.
In fact, if we love God the most, we will love others the best.
C.S. Lewis once said, “When I have learned to love God better than my earthly dearest, I shall love my
earthly dearest better than I do now.”
Jesus calls us to love our neighbor.
And, our love for God inescapably motivates us to love others.
But, of course it’s hard to love everybody....
....As C.W. Vanderbergh once wrote: “To love the whole world for me is no chore. My only real problem is
my neighbor next door.”
I remember, as a kid, we had a neighbor across the street who would not---for some reason--give us the
time of day.
That didn’t stop my parents from cheerfully saying: “Hi!” everytime our neighbor was in his yard.
One day I asked my parents, “Why do you all bother to say “hi” to that guy? He never even looks your way.
He never says “hi” back!”
My parents answer...very matter of fact...no explanations or complaints...but with a hint of surprise at my
question: “Because we are Christians.”
That stuck with me. That impressed me. As Jon-Michael Akers would say, “That’s cool.”
Charlie Brown, the leading character in the “Peanuts” comic strip series, wants very much to be loved and
treated with respect.
In one episode, Charlie Brown is lying down with his head resting on a stone as Lucy stands beside him.
Charlie looks up at Lucy and asks: “If I tell you something, will you promise not to laugh?”
Lucy replies, “I promise.”
“This is very personal and I don’t want you to laugh.”
Lucy responds: “You have my solemn promise.”
Charlie then shares something very special to him: “Sometimes I lie awake at night listening for a voice
that will cry, ‘We love you, Charlie Brown!”
Lucy bursts forth with a boisterous: “HA HA HA HA,” and Charlie is bowled over from his reclining
position.
I would imagine that many of us can relate to what Charlie Brown was feeling...
...I sure can.
The Good News is, however, that Christianity proclaims that this scornful, hurtful laughter is not the last
word...
...that life is not finally a cruel joke in which we are the punch lines!
We are loved...
...God loves us...
...and Jesus overcame hate, evil and death through His sacrificial act of Ultimate love on the cross!!!
And just think of how much more bearable this life would be if all of us practiced love!
Most businesses would benefit greatly if the boss truly loved his or her employees and they knew it!
Most marriages would be happier if spouses heard and saw constant reminders that they were loved.
Most families would be happier if the parents constantly and lovingly affirmed their children.
Think about two very simple but extremely powerful principles that can transform any relationship
almost overnight...
...Here’s the first: When it comes to love, say it.
We need to say it....
....we need to hear ourselves say it....
....others need to hear us say it....
....and we need to hear it from others.
What’s wrong with a general telling his troops he loves them?
Why doesn’t a boss tell his or her employees he loves them?
Why shouldn’t a coach tell his or her players “I love you.”?
In 1999, Duke University played the University of Connecticut for NCAA men’s basketball
championship.
Duke had a chance to win, but in the last 5 seconds a Duke player lost the ball and, with it, the game.
What did the coach say after he lost for the fourth time in a national championship game?
“I’m really proud of my team,” he declared. “I really love these guys. I have a hard time being sad. I
don’t coach for winning. I coach for relationships.”
Perhaps this is one reason why this coach is considered to be one of the most outstanding coaches and
recruiters in America.
The second relationship-transforming principle is: When it comes to love, show it!
Love must not only be articulated but demonstrated.
In the great “love chapter” of the Bible, 1 Corinthians 13, the apostle Paul constantly says, “Love is....
...love does....
...Love is not...
...Love does not.”
Love is proactive...
...it’s tangible...
...it’s practicle...
...and it’s personal.
A simple touch can convey an incredible sense of love, affirmation, and acceptance.
A study conducted at UCLA several years ago found that to maintain physical and emotional health, men
and women need eight to ten meaningful touches each day.
These researchers defined a meaningful touch as a gentle tap, stroke, kiss, or hug, given by a “significant
other” like a husband, wife, parent, or friend.
Of course, in professional relationships...caution must be exercised when touching a person of the
opposite sex.
But the point is...there is a place and a real need for tangible expressions of love.
An old commercial asked parents: “Have you hugged your kids today?”
Good coaches high-five their players...
...good husbands hug their wives...
...good bosses give employees encouraging pats on the back...
...and good Christians hug each other, smile at each other, and laugh with each other.
Love sets off a divine chain reaction...
...Love is the spark that kindles the fire of compassion...
...compassion is the fire that lights the candle of service....
...service is the candle that ignites the torch of hope....
...hope is the torch that lights the beacon of faith...
...Faith is the beacon that reflects the power of God...
...and God is the One Who creates the miracle of love!
Many of us forget that Jesus said that we should love our neighbors as ourselves.
On the surface, some might see this as a mandate for self-love.
But when we consider His words in context--we can see that the principle that Jesus gave us is both
radically new and refreshing!
Essentially, Jesus has declared that when we love God the way we ought to love God...
...we will love others the way we ought to love others...
....and when we love God and others the way we should...
...we will love ourselves in a proper and healthy way.
God’s love gives us a healthy mental picture of ourselves...
...it enhances our self-esteem...
...without getting into self-worship and self-idolization.
God is love...and God loves us more than we can imagine...therefore we ought to love others and love
ourselves.
God’s love is unconditional and self-less....
Evangeline Booth, the daughter of the founder of the Salvation Army, sat in a squalid slum one day,
cleaning the sores of a drunk woman.
“I wouldn’t do that for a million dollars,” said a friend.
“Neither would I,” replied Ms. Booth.
As Christians, we should all continue to allow God to enable us to become better at loving.
Let’s tell every member of our families that we love them and give them several loving touches, pats, hugs
and kisses every day...
...If you are a boss, manager, or employer, tell your employees that you love them and appreciate them for the
work they do....
...If you are an employee, do the same for your employers...
...If we have been at odds with someone, let’s go to that person and affirm our love for him or her--regardless of
our differences!
Now I must give one word of warning: loving others and expressing our love verbally and tangibly opens
ourselves up for risk....but that is the difference between the winners and losers in life...
...A winner is willing to risk not being like others...to rise above all forms of evil and hatred.
Allowing God’s love to flow through us to others involves risk, pain, and heartache....but it will bring
a tidal wave of joy that washes the tough times away!
The winners circle is drawn with the ink of God’s love.
So, let’s get in it and be the winners that God created us to be...
...because we really are not living unless we are loving.
