INTRODUCTION
Opening Statement: He was a high school senior that was really messing his life up. He was being disrespectful to his parents, staying out late at night, and making poor grades in his classes. At this point in his life, he was hanging out with all the wrong people. But one thing that he loved to do was cross-country running. He was a good runner. In one particularly important race, he found himself in a two-man struggle with his rival high school’s top runner, when suddenly, unexpectedly; he tripped and went down hard. While struggling to catch his breath, he felt someone trying to help him up. It was his opponent and star competitor. His opponent managed to help him to begin running again, but instead of his competitor and rescuer pulling away in the race, they finished together that day, stride for stride.
Transition: It was this act of love and kindness on the cross-country course that turned him from his life’s path of destruction. Love won.
Theme: True love manifests itself in sacrificial action. Love and sacrifice go hand-in-hand with husbands and wives, with brother’s and sister’s, with teammates, with business partners, with God and humanity. Today, we extend the parameters of love into an area that includes your enemies, your opponents, your competitors and those who set themselves up as your antagonist for whatever reason.
Title: Love and Sacrifice
Text: Romans 12:9-21
Notation: Some have noted in this passage the “actions” of love in TWO ATTENTION SHIFTS alternating from love and sacrifice as it relates to believers and love and sacrifice as it relates to non-believers: Love and Sacrifice in Christian Relationships (9-13) and Love and Sacrifice in Non-Christian Relationships (14-21). The first deals with how love looks in the Christian family. The second deals with how love looks in the world outside of the family.
Love and Sacrifice in Christian Relationships (9-13)
•Love is sincere and honest with the truth. (9)•Love gives preference to other believers. (10)•Love relishes Christian service. (11)•Love responds positively to trials. (12)•Love practices generosity and hospitality. (13)
Love and Sacrifice in Non-Christian Relationships (14-21)
•Love reacts positively to persecution. (14) • Love empathizes with a fellow-believer and especially an enemy. (15) • Love shows special regard in relationships and for the down-and-out. (16) •Love refuses to react in kind to evil. (17-18)•Love rejects all motives of revenge. (19-21)
Observation: While this “attention shift” may be debatable, what is clearly an unmistakable point is that three times in this passage the apostle stressed the fact that you are not to return evil for evil. And this point applies to those within the family, but especially those outside of the family because so much is at stake with those on the outside and their perception of the Christian faith. In Verses 14, 17, and 21 he underscores the fact that the major way we express love in the world is by not reacting in vengeance when we are mistreated by the world. We’ve got to give our enemies to God. When we sacrifice our lives, we sacrifice our right to settle the score.
Recitation: Romans 12:9 Love must be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil, cling to what is good. 12:10 Be devoted to one another with mutual love, showing eagerness in honoring one another. 12:11 Do not lag in zeal, be enthusiastic in spirit, serve the Lord. 12:12 Rejoice in hope, endure in suffering, persist in prayer. 12:13 Contribute to the needs of the saints, pursue hospitality. 12:14 Bless those who persecute you, bless and do not curse. 12:15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. 12:16 Live in harmony with one another; do not be haughty but associate with the lowly. Do not be conceited. 12:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil; consider what is good before all people. 12:18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all people. 12:19 Do not avenge yourselves, dear friends, but give place to God’s wrath, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. 12:20 Rather, if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in doing this you will be heaping burning coals on his head. 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Key Word: Love is not just a feeling; it’s also a sacrificial action. Romans 12:9-21 answers the question, "What are some practical, everyday ways in which God expects us to exhibit love in our relationships?" Love is more than a feeling; it’s also a sacrifice of actions. And in the spirit of Romans 12:1,2, I want you to think of these actions as a “sacrifice” or “a living sacrifice.”
OUTLINE
Love and Sacrifice in Christian Relationships (9-13)
Love is sincere and honest with the truth. (9)
Exposition: Verse 9 reads, "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good." We are to hate hypocrisy and counterfeit love. But what is the good? It’s defined in the next 11 verses.
Observation: So we learn from the start that the old adage about “Love being blind” is not true of biblical, sacrificial love. Instead, biblical love is discerning, able to distinguish between good and evil, the false and the authentic.
Love gives affectionate preference to other believers. (10)
Exposition: Remember, we are talking about the family of God here. Verse 10 reads, "Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." I bring you back to the Romans 12:1,2 concept of sacrifice. Love sacrifices our preferences for the preferences of another.
Love relishes Christian service. (11)
Exposition: I bring you back to the Romans 12:1,2 concept of sacrifice. Love sacrifices time and energy in service, despite the setbacks. Verse 11 continues: "Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord." Paul argues that love issues forth in caring service.
Love responds positively and patiently to trials. (12)
Exposition: I bring you back to the Romans 12:1,2 concept of sacrifice. Love sacrifices the right to a bad attitude. Verse 12 reads, "Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."
Love practices generosity and hospitality. (13)
Exposition: Paul wrote: 12:13 Contribute to the needs of the saints, pursue hospitality. I bring you back to the Romans 12:1,2 concept of sacrifice. Love sacrifices resources to meet needs. I love the quote that says: “You are not necessarily called to do something great; you are called to do small things with great love.”
Transition: Now, comes the attention shift. Next Paul turns to the issue of loving difficult people, as he tells us about…
Love and Sacrifice in Non-Christian Relationships (14)
Love reacts positively to persecution. (14)
Exposition: I bring you back to the Romans 12:1,2 concept of sacrifice. Love sacrifices the liberty of saying what you want to say according to the old you. Verse 14 exhorts us, "Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.” Jesus said to “Love your enemies and bless them (Matt.5:44; Luke 6:27-28).”
Question: Is Jesus uttering spiritual platitudes or does He really expect us to do this? Does Paul really mean this? The answer is yes and all you have to do is look at their lives. Both men suffered severely and both paid the ultimate price. How can anyone do this? We can’t. Love is a miracle; it’s not natural. Revenge is natural – love is supernatural.
Illustration: I heard the story about a Duke University graduate student living in the dormitory and he was a Christian. Some medical students found this out and whenever they would go out at night and get smashed together, upon their return they would bang on his door, yell obscenities, and curse at him. They even broke into his room and left beer cans behind and pasted pornography on the walls. One day, after a brief break, this Christian at Duke brought some cookies from home, went across the hall, and offered them to the “ring-leader” of the whole bunch. He muttered something and accepted them. The door pounding stopped. The cursing stopped. The vandalism stopped. Love won.
Question: How do you react to your enemies? Oh, there will come a day when the record is set straight – believe me on that point. But is there a desire to break the cycle of evil with love?
Love empathizes with a fellow-believer and especially an enemy. (15)
Exposition: I bring you back to the Romans 12:1,2 concept of sacrifice. Love sacrifices my agenda for someone else. Verse 15: "Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn." Paul is asking us to go to a step beyond sympathy here and to engage in genuine empathy, defined as "the capacity for participation in someone else’s feelings."
Explanation: Sacrificial love doesn’t stand aloof. It enters into joy and sorrow and either sings or suffers with you, depending on where you are, even if you are an enemy.
Illustration: Martha Robinson is the epitome of this point. Always caring for others, concerned about their health, and seeing them through to better days. If I ever needed Martha, I know that Martha would be there for me and for anyone in this congregation. She takes care of Glenn, organizes monthly residence home services, and never leaves church until she has given me a hug and told me what a great job I did that day. She along with many others in our church sends cards and attends funerals and takes care of the less fortunate. In fact, Martha lives by a little piece that I have entitled “What is Love?” “It is silence – when your words would hurt. It is patience – when your neighbor’s curt. It is deafness – when a scandal flows. It is thoughtfulness – for other’s woes. It is promptness – when stern duty calls. It is courage – when misfortune falls.” Martha is all of these things. Love has won in Martha’s life.
Love shows special regard in relationships and for the down-and-out. (16)
Exposition: I bring you back to the Romans 12:1,2 concept of sacrifice. Love sacrifices status, prestige, and pride in order to achieve relational harmony. Verse 16 reads, "Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited." Allow me to underscore three points.
One, harmony is important within faith relationships, but especially with those outside the faith. Their perception of the faith will be formed and framed based on how you live and how you treat people. Do you come across as friendly, compassionate, inviting? Jesus did.
Illustration: I’m sure you’ve noticed how that in the Gospels, the marginalized and criminal found wonderful delight in His presence: women of ill repute, crooked businessmen, and the extreme poor. This inviting disposition of the Savior prompted many of them to hang around long enough to hear His life-changing message. But His inviting disposition preceded all of that. Or, perhaps, you come across as rough, overly opinionated, cantankerous, with no harmony in your relationships. I’m not referencing those who just want to nit-pick or take cheap shots at good, godly people for there are many who operate this way. I am talking about a pattern of disruptive relationships that seem to follow you around. If so, sacrifice that pattern and begin to love first and instruct or share opinions second.
Clarification: To live in harmony with others does not mean that everyone has to be the same. It doesn’t mean that we have to like the same music, dress in the same styles, be the same age, or even believe exactly the same things on every issue. This is not harmony; it is uniformity. When it comes to fellow-believers in the church, to be in harmony means that the church functions as a unit, i.e. everyone is working together in agreement and cooperation. In music, this is called being in harmony. It does not mean that everybody is doing or playing the exact same thing, but it does mean that every instrument and voice is working together to make a sweet sound, rather than doing their own thing. We must work hard and give every effort to see that it happens. We are far greater as a unified group than we are standing alone.
Two, pride disrupts relational harmony. Is there anything more nauseating than someone full of himself or herself – someone who can never admit that they stand corrected? If you lead with your ego and self-conceit, relational harmony is defeated.
Illustration: A man who went by Uncle Zeke in Muleshoe, Texas could not admit when he was wrong, no matter what! One day Uncle Zeke was walking along the street and he happened to shuffle into the blacksmith shop, sawdust all over the floor. What Zeke didn’t know was, just before he got there, the blacksmith had been working with an uncooperative horseshoe and beat on it till it was black. It was still hot, but it wouldn’t cooperate, so he tossed it over in the sawdust. Zeke walked in, looked down and saw that black horseshoe. He picked it up, not knowing it was still hot. Naturally he dropped it very fast. The blacksmith looked over his glasses and said in that Texas-drawl, “Kinda hot, ain’t it, Zeke?” You know what Zeke said? “Nope, just doesn’t take me long to look at a horseshoe.”
Three, check your pride by associating with the “down-and-outs.” One person has said: “The only reason for looking down on anybody is to pick him up.”
Illustration: There’s an usher in our church that doesn’t care where you’re from or how you look or what color you are. Bud Hunter will warmly shake your hand and share a grin with everyone, whether we’re from Batesville, Sunman, St. Leon, Holton, even Kentucky or Ohio! They tell us that your number one people in the local church need to be your ushers and your nursery workers. They are the front-line contacts with our guests. Bud does a great job of it. Bud does little things with great love. All of us are not necessarily called to do something great; but we are all called to do small things with great love. Love has won in Bud’s heart.
Illustration: The story of Henri Nouwen, trained psychologist and theologian, is remarkable in this regard. He taught at Notre Dame, Yale, and Harvard. At one point in his career, he averaged more than a book a year. He traveled widely and was a sought after conference speaker. Philip Yancey said of him, he had a “resume to die for.” But that was his biggest problem. Nouwen felt suffocated and pressured by his success. So he decided to change. He went to South America, and was a missionary for the 3rd world. He did that for 6 months then he came back to the US and back to a hectic speaking schedule. Again, feeling suffocated, Nouwen found himself in the L’Arche Community in France – a home for the seriously disabled. Nouwen somehow felt nourished there, as he loved the down and out. He also served in this way for over 10 years in Toronto in a similar setting in a home called “Daybreak”. One writer observed him at this place. He noted how that Nouwen celebrated the Lord’s Supper with Adam, a young man that Nouwen looked after. The writer stated: Adam can’t talk, walk, or dress himself, and is “profoundly retarded” and he drooled through the entire ceremony. There was no sign of comprehension.
The writer observed: Adam grunted loudly indicating that he might recognize someone. It took 2 hours of Nouwen’s day to care for Adam – bathe, shave, brush his teeth, comb his hair, and guide his hand to eat. When asked why not let someone else care for him, his reply “I’m not giving up anything. It is I, not Adam, who gets the main benefit from our friendship.” Love had won over Nouwen’s pride.
