This is what God thinks about divorce. God hates it! It is an act of violence and anyone who has been thru one can understand what He is talking about. It rips families apart. Divorce will shame your name and strip you of your identity. God makes provision for marriage, but nowhere in the bible does it say that He makes provision for Divorce.
Mark 10:9 Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. NKJV
In fact He says do not do this because what God has put together let no man take apart. When we are joined together in marriage it’s like putting two strips of tape together and joining them together at the glued sides. Those two pieces of tape become strong and one. Taking them apart would be very difficult. In fact to separate them, would have a tearing apart effect. This my friend, is the same effect that happens with divorce.
I was inspired by God to write about this subject. My purpose of these articles is to help Gods people who might be thinking or going thru a divorce. Don’t do it! My prayer is of hope that you will see the truth and that you would be set free from making bad decisions, hopelessness, bondage of sin, fear, and condemnation. I pray and know that this will minister to those that are thinking about divorced and to those who are divorced. I write these articles out of love for the church and my own experience. I know that not everyone that reads this has had the same type of experience that I have gone thru, and that every situation is different. We cannot group everyone into one situation, and call it the same. But there are some principles that will help us so we can apply them to our lives, and they come from the bible which are God’s instructions.
Who are you talking to!
Ps 1:1 Blessed is the man, who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,
Nor stands in the path of sinners, Nor sits in the seat of the scornful; NKJV
First I would like to say that we live in a generation that gives some really bad advice about marriage and divorce. If you’re going listen to someone’s counsel about marriage you better make sure that it going to be advice that lines up with the word of God. Make sure that the counsel you receive is not from some disgruntled person that has gone thru a divorce and their view of marriage is all distorted to the point that they think marriage is straight from the pit of hell. They themselves would never get married again because it doesn’t work. And you surely should not take the advice of a friend or family member who is not saved. They haven’t a clue when it comes to God’s point of view about marriage. I met a woman that was a marriage counselor. She herself was divorced. She had a boyfriend, they were living together and they were having difficulty with their relationship. He ended up leaving her; she committed suicide as a result of the breakup.
Talking with coworkers who are not saved is not a good idea. The advice you’re going to get is worldly. It may sound like this Just leave the bum, or if you’re not happy it’s better to just get a divorce. You have to do what’s right for you. I’m sure God will understand. This is the type of counseling you really need to stay away from. This will kill your marriage and give you some life changing ideas and bad philosophies. Then you have the sympathetic church friend. He/She is so understanding and her counsel is based on pure emotions and feelings. Marriage is a commitment and is not to be based upon feelings. Stay away from sister or brother sympathetic. Church people that give bad advice better think twice about what you’re doing. You’re going to give an account of what you say before God one day. And Woe! Unto the man or woman that causes someone to stumble as the result of some Mickey Mouse counseling.
Luke 17:2 It would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to sin NIV
It’s easy to give advice to someone and not have to deal with the results from them. They are not concerned on the outcome. They don’t have to live with the decisions you make for the rest of their lives. But you do!! You better think twice about who you ask advice from. Try someone who cares about your soul. One who will ask you if this is the will of God for your life. Not how do you feel about this. One that is not bias about your spouse. Someone who is not afraid to tell you straight from the word of God. Hey! Why not ask your Pastor for some advice.
People who are really seeking advice and truth will take the time to go to counseling and follow the instructions of their advice. Its one thing to go to counseling and hear it and it’s another thing to actually be obedient and take action with the advice given.
Of course unless you fall into the area that you really don’t want Godly advice. You’re not really searching for the right answers. You just tell everyone you are to make yourself look better and feel better about yourself. But deep down you’re not seeking truth. You already have it set in your mind what you’re going to do. You’ve been planning this divorce for sometime and you’re not even trying to reconcile your relationship with your spouse. You might have already found a replacement for your spouse and it has put a wedge between you and your spouse. You set in your mind a plan B. Because Plan A is not working out. You just ask for advice from people to let them know what you already have purposed in your heart to do. You’re not concerned about what the bible says. Your not concerned about who it’s going to effect. You’ve not concerned about the children that are involved and how it’s going to affect them. All your concerned about is your own happiness and your own desires. This is a strategy of Hell!!
2 Tim 4:3-4 For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; 4 and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables.NKJV
They will heap up for themselves teachers. In other words their going to get people that will give them the advice that will agree with what they are going to do and already have in mind to do. They have turned their ears away from the truth. They are not concerned about truth so they make their own truth and make it fit their needs.
Isa 53:6 All we like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way; NKJV
Where do you stand when it comes to the subject of Divorce? What do you believe? These are important questions. What kind of advice do you give to those that are thinking about it?
Therefore take heed to your spirit that you do not deal treacherously."
The bible says to take heed to your spirit. In other words if your going to deal with divorce in truth your going to have to be lead by the Holy Spirit. Pray and seek God for his wisdom and wait on Him. To not do this is dealing treacherously. Treacherously means faithless. Were going to have to search our hearts and ask ourselves am I really dealing with my situation the way God would have me do so. Am I doing all that I can to make my marriage work. Do I have selfish motives for wanting to get out of my marriage? Is my purpose for divorced based upon biblical principles? Because there are some principles that are, and will expand upon some later on. What about my children? How will this affect them? What about my spouse, how will this affect them? Do you care about what happens to your spouse?
My advice for those who are thinking about divorce is not to think about it. Take the word out of your vocabulary. When you make a vow to God and to your spouse it is a covenant made between yourself , your spouse, and God. A promise that God says do not break. Work out your marriage. Yes it can be difficult at times. There are times when you don’t feel like it or you’re fed up with your spouse. In those times we need to check our hearts and see what’s happening with our relationship with God. I guarantee that there is a direct link between your relationship with God and your relationship with your spouse. When your relationship with God is lacking then it will affect your relationship with your spouse. They go hand in hand.
Divorce says that God cannot change our lives. He is not Lord of our hearts and our minds. I’m not writing these articles to make people feel good. In fact they might be somewhat harsh. I’m writing them so that you will understand that It’s not just
about you. It’s about God and others. If you were thinking about divorce hopefully I’ve changed your mind. If you’re the person that gives bad advice then stop it. If you’re still considering divorce then at least continue to read what I have to say about it. God hates divorce and we should too! It’s wicked and tears people apart. Especially our children in which I will talk about in Part 2
