INTRO.- ILL.- Some men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the men walked in the office and said, ’We need some four-by-twos. ’The clerk said, ’You mean two-by-fours, don’t you?’
The man said, ’I’ll go check,’ and went back to the truck. He returned in a minute and said, ’Yeah, I meant two-by-fours.’
’All right. How long do you need them?’
The customer paused for a minute and said, ’I’d better go check.’ After awhile, the customer returned to the office and said, ’A long time. We’re gonna build a house.’
WOULDN’T YOU HATE TO SEE THAT HOUSE THEY BUILT?
All people are builders in some form or another. And probably the greatest building we do is in regard to people. We’re all building people, because we all influence people and hopefully, for God and for good in life.
ILL.- One of my favorite Ozark Christian College professors was Wilbur Fields. Wilbur taught Old Testament History and Archaeology and the Bible. I was told by Brother Gerald Griffin who teaches at Ozark that Brother Wilbur Fields had a nervous breakdown a few years ago and had to be put in the Spring River Nursing Home in Joplin, MO. I was told that Brother Wilbur’s breakdown was so bad that he actually wondered if he had done any good in life.
Now it’s hard for me to imagine that he would ever think that way, knowing that he has preached and taught practically all of his life, but nevertheless, I guess that’s what his breakdown did to him.
However, I wanted him to think differently of himself in order to help him and bring him out of his depression. I went to see Brother Wilbur while I was in Joplin for the Preaching and Teaching Convention. I asked him if he remembered me and of course, he did. I quickly told him that he was one of the best professors that I had at Ozark and how highly I thought of him. And I could see tears come to his eyes. We visited a while and I asked him if I could pray for him.
Brothers and sisters, that brother is a builder of both men and women! He taught me so very much at Ozark and actually, more about living the Christian life than he did O. T. History. Wilbur has stayed in my home on several different occasions and displayed the greatest Christian temperament. I bless him and thank God for all the building he has done in life.
WHAT ABOUT YOU? Do you realize that you, too, are a builder of people? It might be your children, your grandchildren but it might also be someone else’s children and others adults and young people. YOU ARE A BUILDER!
Of course, I think we all realize that God is the greatest builder of all….He builds people in ways we never could!
Heb. 3:4 “For every house is built by someone, but God is the builder of everything.”
God is the builder of everything that is good and holy and right. And God is in the business building of good fathers as well.
PROP.- For Father’s Day I would like to share a few thoughts about building a father. If I could build a father...
I. IF I COULD I WOULD BUILD A PATIENT FATHER
ILL.- There is a story about a father who became disturbed about the length of time his six-year-old son was taking to get home from school.
The father decided he would make the trip to discover for himself how long it should take a small boy to cover the distance.
The father settled on 20 minutes but his son was still taking an hour. Finally the father decided to make the trip with his son.
After the trip, the father said, "The 20 minutes I thought reasonable was right, but I failed to consider such important things as a side trip to track down a trail of ants...or an educational stop to watch a man fix a flat...or the time it took to swing around a half dozen telephone poles...or how much time it took for a boy just to get acquainted with two stray dogs and a brown cat.
"In short," said the father, "I had forgotten what it is really like to be six years old."
Brothers and sisters, it takes great patience to be a good father.
ILL.- A new study (June 6th) came out recently in HealthDay News that your parenting style affects your child’s weight and whether she will be overweight by first grade.
"Children of authoritarian parents had five times the risk of being overweight compared to children of more diplomatic style parents.”
What are we talking about? I think they are saying that a child’s health is in danger when parents are overbearing and don’t demonstrate patience with their children.
And it may be that far more than their health is in danger. Sometimes this type of parenting could cause children to become estranged to people and to God.
If a parent, for example, is a Christian and yet is extremely dogmatic and authoritarian those children could eventually become alienated from their parents and their God!
We’ve all heard the stories about parents who were perhaps overly strict and then when the children got older and were on their own that they had nothing to do with God and the church.
Ephesians 4:2 “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”
1 Thessalonians 5:14 “And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone.”
We are admonished to be patient with all people, including our children. And there have been times in my life when I was not so patient with my children.
ILL.- I remember on one particular occasion when my daughter Holly was probably 8 years old and Shane was 2. It was in the summertime and I could hear them laughing and playing outside. Suddenly, I heard them laughing to extreme so I went outside to see what was so funny. They were standing in the parking lot next to the house and had covered their shoes in dirt and they thought that was the funniest thing in the world, but dad did not and I jumped them about it. And their laughter turned to sobriety instantly.
Sometime later I really felt bad about that because they didn’t do anything other than get a little dirt on their shoes.
I had a deacon tell me one time, “Steve, you got let kids be kids.” And to do that we must all exercise more patience with our children.
If I could build a father I would build me with more patience!
II. IF I COULD I WOULD BUILD A GODLY FATHER
ILL.- One preacher said, “as a minister, I conduct many baptismal services. My denomination baptizes in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost. One Sunday, my family and I went to a friend’s home in the country. Our four children went outside to play with the others. After a short while, we heard only silence and wondered what the children were up to. We found them behind a barn quietly playing "church." Our 4-year-old daughter Susan was conducting the baptismal service. She held a cat over a barrel of water. Trying to be as solemn as her father, she repeated the phrase she had heard many times: "I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and in the hole you go!"
Certainly, that little 4-year old had learned something good from her preacher daddy.
ILL.- The CBS news program 48 Hours did an investigation into the children of some famous people and how they were influenced by what they saw from their parents while growing up. On this program there was an interview with James Raymond, who is the son of a famous person. You couldn’t identify his famous father by his name, however, because he was adopted shortly after birth. He was raised by a California family who kept his adoption records sealed until he was 31. That was when Raymond discovered that his natural father is David Crosby of the group Crosby, Stills, and Nash.
Raymond’s habits, preferences, and attitudes were more closely related to his adoptive parents than his natural father. His behavior and beliefs reflected those of the parents who raised him and what is good came not from ancestry but from what he saw happening in his parent’s lives.
Example is apparently more powerful than heritage.
II Thessalonians 3:6-8 “In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, we command you, brothers, to keep away from every brother who is idle and does not live according to the teaching you received from us. For you yourselves know how you ought to follow our example. We were not idle when we were with you, nor did we eat anyone’s food without paying for it. On the contrary, we worked night and day, laboring and toiling so that we would not be a burden to any of you.”
We parents and fathers do set an example for our children to follow. Be it good or bad, they often do walk in our steps.
Many young people, for example, have been raised by hard-working parents and they, too, became hard-working adults.
I Corinthians 11:1 “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.”
The greatest example, however, that any parent or father can set for his children is that of godliness or Christ-likeness.
ILL.- I am thinking of an elder, now 80 years old in Iberia, MO, who raised two children in a Christian home and in the church. I am confident that those children saw their father read God’s Word in the home and pray, as well as faithfully attend church and serve anyway he could. Today, both of those children are in the church and serving the Lord. And all because both mom and dad set an example of godly living for their children.
If I could build a father I would build me with more godliness!
III. IF I COULD I WOULD BUILD A LOVING FATHER
I Cor. 1:8 “We know that we all possess knowledge. Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up.”
ILL.- There’s a Spanish story of a father and son who had become estranged. The son ran away, and the father set off to find him. He searched for months to no avail. Finally, in a last desperate effort to find him, the father put an ad in a Madrid newspaper. The ad read: “Dear Paco, meet me in front of this newspaper office at noon on Saturday. All is forgiven. I love you. Your Father.” On Saturday 800 Pacos showed up, looking for forgiveness and love from their fathers.
ILL.- Dr. James Dobson said, “Loves isn’t something you buy. Your kids spell it T-I-M-E and it costs more than M-O-N-E-Y.”
ILL.- Harmon Killebrew who used to play for the Minn. Twins said, “My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, ‘You’re tearing up the grass.’ Dad would reply, ‘We’re not raising grass, we’re raising boys.’”
ILL.- With a timid voice and idolizing eyes, the little boy greeted his father as he returned from work, "Daddy, how much do you make an hour?"
Greatly surprised, but giving his boy a glaring look, the father said: "Look, son, not even your mother knows that. Don’t bother me now, I’m tired."
"But Daddy, just tell me please, how much do you make an hour," the boy insisted. The father finally giving up replied: " Twenty dollars per hour." "Okay, Daddy, could you loan me ten dollars?" the boy asked.
Showing restlessness and positively disturbed, the father yelled: "So that was the reason you asked how much I earn, right! Go to sleep and don’t bother me anymore!"
It was already dark and the father was meditating on what he had said and was feeling guilty. Maybe he thought, his son wanted to buy something. Finally, trying to ease his mind, the father went to his son’s room.
"Are you asleep son?" asked the father. "No, Daddy. Why?" replied the boy partially asleep. "Here’s the money you asked for earlier," the father said. "Thanks, Daddy!" rejoiced the son, while putting his hand under his pillow and removing some money. "Now I have enough! Now I have twenty dollars!" the boy said to his father, who was gazing at his son, confused at what his son just said. "Daddy could you sell me one hour of your time?"
ILL.- The Bible tells the story of Absalom who was the son of King David. Through a series of circumstances, Absalom began to despise his father and made plans to become king in his father’s place. He sowed seeds of division and rebellion in his father’s kingdom. In the beginning he did things that did not seem to be a danger, but he was winning the hearts of the people of Israel. The day came when he saw an opportunity and openly led a rebellion against his father David in an attempt to take over his kingdom. David’s greatest fear was that Absalom would be destroyed in the battle, which is what eventually happened. When word came that Absalom had been killed, far from being happy about it, the Bible says, “The king was shaken. He went up to the room over the gateway and wept. As he went, he said: ‘O my son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! If only I had died instead of you — O Absalom, my son, my son!’” (2 Samuel 18:33).
David’s heart was not to destroy his son, but to save his son, even if it meant dying in his place — in spite of what Absalom thought. Absalom wanted to be king, and the ironic thing is that David may have eventually made him a king. David was not his enemy, he was his father. He loved him in spite of his rebellion.
If I could build a father I would build me with more love!
CONCLUSION-------------------------------------
I Cor. 3:7 “So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow.”
Not only does God make things grow, He also builds people and builds them well. If we fathers had a prayer today, hopefully, it would be, “Father God, make me a better father; a more patient, more godly and more loving.”
