1. Title: You Could Use a Good Friend
2. Text: 2 Chronicles 22-24; 2 Kings 12
3. Audience: Villa Heights Christian Church, AM crowd, June 18, 2006, Father’s Day, 5th in the series “The Kings and I”
4. Objectives:
-for the people to understand the importance of having and being a good friend, and for this to especially be understood by fathers; to be able to recognize the relationships in their life are good and to contrast these with those that are harmful
-for the people to feel concerned that they surround themselves by godly influences; to care about being a godly influence on the people in their circle of friends; to feel that the role of fathers is vital, and to feel the necessity of supporting and encouraging fathers to be their best
-for the people to do a “Friendventory” and assess if the relationships in their life are building their faith or harming it; to reaffirm to some dads that they are appreciated and needed as leaders and guides in our lives
5. When I finish my sermon I want my audience to be convinced that our friendships are very vital, and that our lives are being influenced by and are influencing those around us
6. Type: biographical
7. Dominant Thought: Strong friendships carry the potential to be a great influence for good in our lives
8. Outline:
Intro: It’s Father’s Day, and in addition to talking to and about fathers this morning, I want to talk to everyone about the importance of right friendships in our life. Fatherhood is far more than friendship, but it includes friendship, and I’m finding that many of the qualities that apply to good friendship apply to fatherhood as well.
The fact is, everyone could use a good friend. People who try to deny this are making a choice that makes them less than they could be. You could use a good friend. It’s the whole reason that there are things called “support groups.” You know, you get together with people who share some struggle you have, and you encourage each other and help each other through it. It’s the reason there are groups like Alcoholics Anonymous and Gamblers Anonymous. Having a friend helps. In the movie, “Finding Nemo,” it’s the reason there’s a support group for sharks who are trying to change their image of being mindless eating machines and to stop eating fish. (clip from Finding Nemo – 20:15-22:30)
You could use a good friend.
You’ve heard the old story, maybe even seen it in some movie. The kingdom is ruled by oppression. The king who’s on the throne shouldn’t be. He got there by some kind of coup, and had all the rightful heirs of the throne destroyed – all but one, who escaped. The tyrant king would love to get his hands on him to kill him. Somewhere, within the kingdom, a group of loyal subjects maintains a covert resistance. At the risk of being caught and killed, they’re hiding an infant, the rightful heir to the throne. They’re loyal to him, not because of his leadership, but because that baby represents the restoration of things as they ought to be in the kingdom. When the moment is right, they’ll declare him king and launch their move.
It makes a great story, doesn’t it? Great material, only, it’s not just a fairy tale. It’s really what happened in Judah right before King Joash. Athaliah, the former king’s mother, took over when her son died, and at the same time had all of the royal heirs of the family line of David killed.
2 Chronicles 22:11
But Jehosheba, the daughter of King Jehoram, took Joash son of Ahaziah and stole him away from among the royal princes who were about to be murdered and put him and his nurse in a bedroom.
For the next 6 years, while the wicked Athaliah ruled Judah, Jehosheba and her husband kept their baby nephew, the rightful heir to the throne, hidden away in the temple. They lived there, in the temple, because Jehoiada was high priest. It’s no wonder that the boy would grow up with a real deep concern about the temple. Then, when Jehoiada had everything ready and in place, he had Joash declared king, and Athaliah put to death.
2 Chronicles 24:1-2
Joash was seven years old when he became king, and he reigned in Jerusalem forty years…Joash did what was right in the eyes of the LORD all the years of Jehoiada the priest.
Take special note of that last line, because it’s the key to applying this story to our lives. Joash was a good king, as long as he had the influence of Jehoiada in his life. Right after Jehoiada died, it all changed. Jehoiada had been his good friend, and even like a father to him.
Like I said before, nearly every quality that applies to being a good friend can just as well be applied to being a good father. So, dads, take a special note of these qualities and see where you can make them a part of your Dad-hood.
A good friend and a good dad…
I. Has Your Back
Joash literally owed his life to Jehoiada and Jehosheba. He was somewhere around a year old when they hid him away to save him. If they hadn’t, he would have ended up dead just like all the others. Jehoiada was a good friend by protecting Joash when he couldn’t protect himself.
A good friend is someone who has “got your back.” In other words, they’re going to protect you and see to your well-being even when you don’t realize it. That’s what it means when someone “has your back.” I can’t tell you the value of knowing that you have a friend like that. Our guys and ladies who are veterans, and who are currently serving in the military could tell you all about it.
Ill - A couple years ago, someone Emailed me a series of photos from a hunting trip in NM. The trip was on mule back, along with dogs, and there was a mountain lion stalking the hunting party. At some point, it attacked, and a mule proceeded to beat the stuffings out of that cougar. That was pretty amazing in itself, but what I found humorous was the dogs. See, while the mule is here pummeling the mountain lion, look where the dogs are! When I say a friend has your back, I’m not talking about someone who says, “We’re behind you…way behind you!” I’m talking about someone who stands up for you when you don’t see what’s coming. I’m talking about someone who silences rumors about you; someone who warns you about danger down the road; someone who stands up with you when you face a challenge.
Story - Jackie Robinson was the first black to play major league baseball. While breaking baseball’s "color barrier," he faced jeering crowds in every stadium. But one game, playing in his home stadium in Brooklyn, he committed an error. His home fans began to ridicule him. He stood at second base, humiliated, while the fans jeered. It was then that "Pee Wee" Reese the shortstop came over and stood next to him. He put his arm around Jackie Robinson and faced the crowd. The fans grew quiet. Robinson later said that arm around his shoulder saved his career.
Dads, let me talk to you first this morning. Our kids need to know we’ve got their back. No single person could be more important to reassure a child that everything is going to be alright than Dad. I always knew I could count on my dad to stand behind me if I needed him. He had my back.
I hope you dads are careful to be that for your children. They need that from us. Fact is, we need that quality in the people who are close to us. The Apostle Paul didn’t normally travel alone. Instead, he had friends by his side who helped him in the work. Paul knew his Bible. He had read…
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
A good friend has your back. Be that kind of friend. Be that kind of dad.
A good friend, and a good dad, also…
II. Brings Out The Best In You
Take a boy who owes his life to godly friends, save him by hiding him in the temple for 6 years, and later, when he’s king, it makes sense that he’s going to want to take care of the temple.
2 Chronicles 24:7 Now the sons of that wicked woman Athaliah had broken into the temple of God and had used even its sacred objects for the Baals.
The temple needed repairs, so Joash (v4) decided to restore the temple of the Lord. To raise the money for it, he set a special chest at the gate of the temple and reminded the people to pay the temple tax. It worked well. The money came in, the temple was fixed up, and then …
2 Chronicles 24:14 b
As long as Jehoiada lived, burnt offerings were presented continually in the temple of the LORD.
Once again, you’ll have to take note about the line “as long as Jehoiada lived,” because his influence was an important key in Joash’s faithfulness. Jehoiada was a good friend who brought out the best in King Joash. He pointed him in the right direction.
Proverbs 27:17
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.
A good friend can be the reason for all kinds of good choices and accomplishments.
Proverbs 27:9-10
Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one’s friend springs from his earnest counsel.
Proverbs 6 says even the wounds of a friend can be trusted.
What’s the big deal about Promise Keepers and small groups and ladies Bible studies? It’s simple, really, it’s people becoming friends with others who help bring out their best. That’s good for anyone.
While the Bible has plenty to say about being a good friend, it also has plenty of warning about the negative effects of the wrong friends.
Proverbs 22:24-25
Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared.
1 Corinthians 15:33-34
Do not be misled: "Bad company corrupts good character." Come back to your senses as you ought, and stop sinning; for there are some who are ignorant of God--I say this to your shame.
After King Solomon died, his son Rehoboam came to be king. Very early on, he was faced with a choice – whether to keep up the taxes that his father had put on the people, or to lower them. So, he consulted with the counselors who had served his father. They said to lower the taxes. (I Kings 12:8) But Rehoboam rejected the advice the elders gave him and consulted the young men who had grown up with him and were serving him. They said just the opposite. They said to raise taxes. The outcome was Israel splitting into 2 different nations that would never get back together. It happened because a king decided to surround himself with the influence of ungodly friends. It just serves as another reminder that you could use a good friend.
Ill - The captain of the ship looked into the dark night and saw faint lights in the distance. Immediately he told his signalman to send a message: "Alter your course 10 degrees south." Promptly a return message was received: "Alter your course 10 degrees north."
The captain was angered; his command had been ignored. So he sent a second message: "Alter your course 10 degrees south--I am the captain!" Soon another message was received: "Alter your course 10 degrees north--I am a seaman third class Jones."
Immediately the captain sent a third message, knowing the fear it would evoke: "Alter your course 10 degrees south--I am a battleship." Then the reply came: "Alter your course 10 degrees north--I am a lighthouse." There are plenty of voices shouting at us through the fog. We need the clear and solid voice of a lighthouse in our lives – a friend who is there with the right advice about where to go and how to get there.
You have those “Friend-ventories” that you have filled out today. I’d like you to take those in hand right now. Look down that list of friends – people who are important in your life – people who have influenced you and who are going to influence you. Let me ask you: are those friends bringing out the best in you? Are they encouraging you to make godly choices? Do they challenge you to grow in your faith? Do they cause you to think and talk about things that please the Lord? Or is there someone on that list that has been keeping you from being honest with God? It’s time to do something about that. It may be that you can influence your friend for good. It may be that you need to gravitate away from that bad influence in your life for this time. Regardless of what you choose to do, know this, your life will be influenced by your closest friends. Choose wisely.
One last work about a good friend:
III. Deserves Good Friendship in Return
Joke – There’s a cartoon of a little boy’s grandma. Dear Grandma, Thank you for the tape recorder you sent for Christmas. I have already made quite a bit of money selling Dad tapes I’ve made around the house on Sunday mornings. I am saving up to buy a video camera. Thank you again. Love, Eldon
OK, Eldon, give Dad a break! Especially if he has been a good dad to you. That good parenting deserves a good return. Unfortunately, for all that Jehoiada had done for Joash, he forgot it all after Jehoiada was gone.
2 Chronicles 24:17-19
After the death of Jehoiada, the officials of Judah came and paid homage to the king, and he listened to them. They abandoned the temple of the LORD, the God of their fathers, and worshiped Asherah poles and idols. Because of their guilt, God’s anger came upon Judah and Jerusalem. Although the LORD sent prophets to the people to bring them back to him, and though they testified against them, they would not listen.
Still, there was one prophet that Joash might hear – the son of Jehoiada – someone who would have been nearly a brother to him.
2 Chronicles 24:20-22
Then the Spirit of God came upon Zechariah son of Jehoiada the priest. He stood before the people and said, "This is what God says: ’Why do you disobey the Lord’s commands? You will not prosper. Because you have forsaken the LORD, he has forsaken you.’" But they plotted against him, and by order of the king they stoned him to death in the courtyard of the Lord’s temple. King Joash did not remember the kindness Zechariah’s father Jehoiada had shown him but killed his son, who said as he lay dying, "May the LORD see this and call you to account."
And he did. Within a year, the Arameans marched against them. God turned over the much larger army of Judah to the Arameans, because they had forsaken him. Joash was left severely wounded, and finally, a couple of his officials killed him in his bed. He wasn’t buried with honor in the tombs of the kings. Ironically, Jehoiada, who wasn’t a king, was honored by being buried in the tombs of the kings.
Jehoiada had been a great friend to Joash. He certainly deserved better in return. A few hundred years earlier, King David was looking for some way to show kindness to someone from the household of his good friend Jonathan. He found a son of Jonathan’s, and because Jonathan had been such a good friend, David took special care of his son.
Everyone recognizes that someone who has been a good friend deserves to be treated in kind. Dads who’ve done a good job of fathering deserve to be honored for their good job. Isn’t that a big part of the focus on Father’s Day? Aren’t good dads people worthy of a good return for what they’ve done?
So, Dads, if you want to be worthy of special treatment today, I’d advise you be a good friend and leader at home. And I’d suggest we all consider if we’ve been good friends in return to the good friendship that others have shown us.
Conclusion:
Jesus had a lot to say about Friendship. Among other things were these words He spoke just hours before the cross:
John 15:13-15 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command. 15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.
Jesus showed what He says is the greatest friendship – He laid down His life for you. Now, even if you have a Paul, Barnabas, and a Timothy in your life, I’m sure there’s one friendship you can’t afford to miss out on. You need Jesus. You could use a good friend like that…
