Summary: Clarifying the erroneous beliefs regarding singles in the body of Christ
Problems (Myths) Affecting Singles’ Ministry
Bishop David Ibeleme
1 Cor. 7.
1. The Church has been viewed as a married institution – “The bride of Christ”. Hence single people are “abnormal”.
The concept of the church as the bride of Christ is not the same as a human wife.
The bride of Christ is actually the New Jerusalem which is represented by the church.
The church is really not the bride of Christ – Rev. 22.
2. Marriage is God’s will for everyone.
How about Jesus and the Apostle Paul?
It is important to note that everyone is not graced or gifted by God to marry – 1 Cor. 7.
The Bible actually recommends that people stay single in instances of persecution against the Church – 1 Cor. 7:26ff.
3. Marriage is seen as the ultimate fulfillment in the life.
It’s like until you are married you’re not yet fulfilled.
Contentment not marriage is Gods major gift to us as believers – 1Tim. 6:8-10.
Contentment is a product of knowing the heart of God.
It also manifests as satisfaction – Phil. 4:11
4. Singles are a threat to the average marriage.
This is because singles are perceived as always wanting to get married.
You cannot freely relate to married people or even anyone else without being suspected to have marriage in mind.
5. Church is not well informed about singles’ ministry.
We don’t fully know How to work with singles – Hos. 4:6.
Important to view singleness as wholeness.
Bible teaches that it is a gift, a grace gift – 1Cor.7:7.
God calls us to be satisfied with singleness when we are single.
6. Many Pastors don’t have the skills or the freedom to work with single people.
Sometimes not easy to communicate objectively with singles.
Difficult to dissociate singleness with the idea of marriage.
Many ministers feel it is simply a time to prepare for marriage.
7. There are different kinds of singles
Singleness is mis-understood because there are several types.
All single people are not the same.
Widow(er), Separated (but married), Divorced, Those who have Never Been Married.
8. Church has put “Theology” before the needs of single people.
We are seemingly more concerned about arguing about divorce than we are about ministering to divorced people.
We must never allow our religious views or doctrines to prevent us from ministering to folks who are divorced.
9. Other general misconceptions about singles.
Church leaders e.g. Bishops and Deacons ought to be married – 1Tim. 3.
Being a Single-Parent exposes you to moral ridicule.
Ministry emphasis by the church on Single-Parenting can be viewed as supporting it.
Copyright © 2005 by Rev. Dr. David Ibeleme
Victorious Faith Ministries
P. O. Box 4378, St. Ann’s, Port of Spain, Trinidad & Tobago.
Tel: +1(868) 625-6863 • Fax: (868) 623-1020
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