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Sermons

Summary: Proverbial wisdom. 1- Making good plans. 2- Finding joy.

INTRO.- Quips, quotes and notes.

- Before deciding to retire from your job, stay home a week and watch daytime television.

- Science has increased our life span. We can look forward to paying our taxes at least ten years longer.

- No matter what your lot in life, build something on it.

- It’s hard to get a child to pay attention to you, especially when you’re telling him something for his own good.

- Personality is what you are when lots of people are around. Character is what you are when everybody goes home.

- The truth hurts – especially on the bathroom scales.

- A timid man said to his wife, “We’re going out tonight and that’s semi-final.”

- They are called “personal loans” because if you miss a payment they sure do get personal.

- Gasoline prices are so very high! A man in California recently drove into a service station and asked for a dollar’s worth of gas. The attendant dabbed a few drops behind his ears.

- All husbands are just about alike, but they have different faces so you can tell them apart.

- Nothing beats love at first sight except love with insight.

- If exercise is so good for you, why do athletes retire at about the age of thirty-five?

- The way prices and taxes are soaring, the good old days were just last week.

- The biggest need in auto safety is to recall a few million defective drivers.

- People are guided to heaven more by footprints than by signposts.

- A botanist is a man who knows all about flowers. A florist is a man who knows how much people will pay for them.

- People with an axe to grind often fly off the handle.

- Adolescence is the awkward age when a child is too old to say something cute and too young to say something sensible.

- An ingrate is neither in nor great.

- A politician is a man who gets sworn in and then cussed out.

- It’s a great deal easier to make a mistake than to unmake one.

- A person isn’t educated until he has learned how little he really knows.

- No matter how limited your vocabulary is, it’s big enough to let you say something you’ll regret later.

- You’re getting older when all sports leave you tired – including just reading about them.

- Well-bred people never stir their coffee with their right hand. They use a spoon.

- You can’t lose your head without losing your face.

- A small gift will do – if your heart is big enough.

- Middle age, to our dismay, is when we are done before the day is.

- People with tact have less to retract.

- In some cases, youngsters have been given too much, too soon, and now it’s too late.

- The happiest miser on earth is one who saves his friends.

- A hothead seldom sets the world on fire.

- Many convictions are usually hand-me-downs.

- Bragging is delivering a YOU logy.

- Frustration is not having anyone to blame but yourself.

- When your outgo exceeds your income, then your unkeep will become your downfall.

- When God made heads, he covered up the ones he didn’t like.

- The best side of a bar is outside.

Now the book of Proverbs.

I. PLANS

15:22 “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

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