Summary: Proverbial wisdom from chapter 16. 1- Plans 2- Pride 3- Prosperity

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INTRO.- Quips and quotes.

- A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

- A bulldog can whip a skunk, but sometimes it’s not worth it.

- A clean house is a sign of a misspent life.

- A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

- A closed mouth gathers no feet.

- A diplomat is one who thinks twice before saying nothing.

- A friend in need is a pest.

- A husband is someone who takes out the trash and gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.

- A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. A woman must do what he can’t.

- A teacher’s job is to take a room full of live wires and make sure they are well grounded.

- Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

- Being young is a fault that diminishes daily.

- Blessed is he that can laugh at himself, he will never cease to be amused.

- Blessed is he that expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed. - Ben Franklin

- Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash

- Credit cards are like mosquitoes. You can keep them away for a while, but sooner or later they will be back to suck your blood.

- Dear God, I have a problem; it’s me.

- Do what you think is right in your heart. You’ll be criticized anyway. - Eleanor Roosevelt

- Eat a live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse can happen to you for the rest of the day.

- Everything is funny as long as it is happening to someone else. - Will Rogers

- Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

- Few things are harder to put up with than a good example. - Mark Twain

- Fish and visitors stink after three days. - - Ben Franklin

- God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers.

- Golf: A good walk ruined. - Mark Twain

- Happiness is merely the remission of pain.

- He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals. - Ben Franklin

- He who dies with the most toys is still dead.

- Housework done properly can kill you.

- How many observe Christ’s birthday, how few his precepts. - Ben Franklin

- I believe the only time the world beats a path to my door is when I’m in the bathroom.

- I have a new philosophy, I’m only going to dread one day at a time. - Charles Schulz ("Peanuts")

- I have never killed a man but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure. - Clarence Darrow

- I never let my schooling interfere with my education. - Mark Twain

- I refuse to enter a battle of wits with an unarmed man.

- I saw few die of hunger; of eating -- 100,000.

- If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.

- If at first you don’t succeed, you’re about average.

- If the baby is happy, don’t try to make it happier.

- If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.

- If you’d lose a troublesome visitor, lend him money. - Ben Franklin

- In God we trust; all others pay cash.

- It is better to be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt. - Mark Twain

- It’s not easy being green. - Kermit the Frog

- I’ve suffered a great many catastrophes in my life. Most of them never happened. - Mark Twain

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