Don’t pretend to be better than you really are. You could end up worse than you were; and besides, you don’t have to fake it to make it with God.
A cowboy walked into a Texas bar, ordered three bottles of beer, and sat in the back room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finished them, he came back to the bar and ordered three more.
The bartender told the cowboy, "You know, a bottle goes flat after I open it. It would taste