Summary: The import of agreement in marriage and why families should be united.
THE POWER OF AGREEMENT
If we understand the full import of marriage we will not trivialize it and we will not do anything to tamper with it. One of the popular pronouncements that is made in a wedding ceremony is that the marital union is governed by God and no one should do anything to tamper with the union. We also say that what God has joined together let no man put asunder. Matt 19:3 Pharisees came to Jesus tempting him, and saying unto him, is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? Jesus referred them to Gen 1:27 saying have ye not read that he which made man made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife and they twain shall be one flesh. Wherefore they are no more twain but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
But we know that the devil has consistently put the institution of marriage under siege such that even when people live together the same roof as husband and wife, there is so much division that they cannot take advantage of the spiritual provision for matrimony. Right from bible time, the institution of marriage had been under so much attack. As soon as the first marriage was put together by God, the devil stepped in and tried to destroy the union. Gen 3:1 says that the serpent was more subtle than any beast in the field and he immediately came to the woman to deceive her. He said, has God said ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden? It is the devil that comes with the message of scarcity and lack, meanwhile God has created us with the me taketh of abundance. God had said that man may partake of all the trees. Gen 2:16 says God commanded man saying of every tree of the garden, thou mayest freely eat, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil thou shalt not eat, for in the day that thou eat thereof, thou shalt surely die. Of course, the serpent deceived her to eat of the tree and she gave her husband and he did eat of it. The challenge here is that the reason why the husband are of the fruit was because at this stage they were both walking in unity and it would appear that it was not the right thing to do.
But God created man perfect and man ought to have known that in everything in life there must be process. That was why God created the man first, then created the woman out of the man, so that man would take headship over his wife and provide leadership and guidance to her. In order to resolve this, when God was prescribing the punishment to the wife, which in fact is the path of restoration, he said in Gen 3:16 I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception, in sorrow thou shall bring forth children, and thy desire shall be to thy husband and he shall rule over thee. Another interpretation says, you shall be subject to thy husband and he shall rule over thee. In response to this role, look at what Adam does which brings the first family back to the place of blessing. As soon as the pronouncements are made against him, he ceases the initiative in verse 20 and called his wife's name Eve saying she is the mother of all living. He did not start trading blames with her. Rather what he does is to take responsibility for the future and the unity of the home. As soon as he does this, God steps out and makes a coat of skins for the first family and clothes them. By doing this he had to shed blood in remission and as a covering for the sin of Adam and his wife thereby bringing them back to the place of blessing. He had an understanding that without unity, the family will not be able to withstand the pitfalls of life and the attacks of the enemy.
However, the devil had laid a foundation for his strategy against the family union and matrimony. The subsequent years saw the introduction of polygamy which is one of man's contraptions against marriage. It was in the wicked lineage of Cain through Lamech that polygamy was introduced. You will see that all through the bible where there was polygamy, there was deep division in the family which has great challenges to the future of that family. We see it in the family of Abraham when Hagar was introduced to give birth to Ishmael. You will see that at a stage, Ishmael became a threat to Isaac such that God had to ask Abraham to request Hagar to leave with Ishmael.