Summary: I am Growing in leaps and bounds,but not commited enough, knowlegde can set you free but knowledge can condemn you as well as a lack of groath & commitment. will I be lost because I draw too close to be able resist anymore - Is the narrow road too narrow?
As I draw closer to God, God in turn draws closer to me. I've been growing constantly as a result of this relationship. I am
Growing in leaps and bounds, at a steep and steady pace: I am falling and growing at the same time, but should I fail, I will be lost, right? How bad would it be if I love Jesus this much and I end up being condemned anyway? Let me add, being condemned as a result of my keen knowledge of God’s Word and my sincere desire to draw even closer. - How sad will it be!?
Sometimes we look back at our salvational experience and we ask: Where did my Spiritual High go? I am afraid to grow so close to the Lord that the temptations get, so tough, that I would not want to overcome anymore.
We wholeheartedly and unconditionally surrender our lives to Christ and we start living a life of victory. You get a spiritual high and you are floating on cloud nine, doing just great! For a while at least! But then you look back and you realize that, slowly but surely, you became stuck in rut. – It happened!– You become so busy and preoccupied with other things that you just can’t seem to find time for God anymore then you desperately try to make time for God and to Spark up your relationship with the Holy Spirit; but you get bombarded with responsibilities. It feels as if you got a promotion – The story of your life became a never ending cycle of crisis management! You battle with that eerie nagging feeling that you are in a war against time and circumstances, but you are not growing-Spiritually-You are not where the Lord wants you to be, and you know it. You, so want to relive the honeymoon of your born again experience. But no matter how hard you try you can’t seem to make it happen – victory is just out of reach. You unwillingly find yourself devoting all of your time to other purposes and concerns. You really don’t want to engague your mind with other things and you desperately want to spend time with God. But you drift away. You are determined to get rid of these “time bombs” but you can’t seem to shake it; every time consuming task becomes vitally important to take care of. Your spiritual boat is sinking. You are asking yourself – am I where Jesus wants me to be? And you become very concerned. Then you start to wonder, did I really make a full commitment; am I really saved? Will I make it? Surely God won’t say “good and faithful servant” to a weakling like me? Your past sins haunt you, and you worry. You are asking yourself. Will I fall back and can someone like me, really stay committed. Listen up and listen real good! These thoughts are messages coming from the Holy Spirit, impressing your mind to return to Christ. Whatever you do- do not ignore them! I know you are concerned and deeply troubled by your lack of devotion. You are anxious and worried that you would lose your first love – and you should be! Let me say it again YOU SHOULD BE!
Today, I will tell you a true life story: it is a part of my battle contending with God and it is very real! And you need to plead with God till you get victory – Don’t stop-ever!
I want to share with you how God has touched my life, rescuing my life from spiritual suicide (inactivity) Giving me peace and relieving me from an intense fear of losing my way.
So, now you know, my clean slate (washed as white as wool) was not so clean anymore. When we slide back, we seem to fail to take action; there is a failure to follow through. I want to tell you a secret – the single most important thing you could do to obtain a life of continual victory is to get up! Always - but always GET UP! Do not stay down, no matter what – even if you feel worse than the devil himself. GET – UP already! Ask, seek, and knock – desperately, urgently and continually. It spells A.S.K Ask, seek, and knock and it will be opened to you, you will find and you will go in and the Father promised the Holy Spirit to those who ask for it!
You might feel as I felt. So let me tell you about it: I gave my life to Christ and He saved me. I was baptized, and I started growing in the Lord, through continual Bible study, He has asked me to draw closer and become more like him by surrendering my will to His commandments (a reflection of His character).