Summary: First in family series Walking in Harmony
What Every Wife Owes Her Husband
Walking in Harmony, pt. 1
So far we have seen how to walk in unity, in purity, and now in harmony, followed by in victory.
What is a feminist? What makes one radical/militant? Are you pro-woman? What does the Bible say about this subject? How about this word 'submit?' Can you believe this is our subject tonite?!
The negative connotation of a feminist is anyone who seeks to obliterate the distinction between men and women. But God did make us differently. And when He made the woman, He made her just right! And so woman will never be more fulfilled than when she plays the role God designed for her.
In the verses which follow we see that wives are to submit to husbands, and husbands to Christ, children to parents, and employees to their bosses. Headship does not mean dictatorship. It's not total control. Submission and subjection are found throughout the Bible, and never does it indicate this as a negative. Even Jesus was subject to His parents, which He created.
Submission is simply responding correctly to the loving leadership God has given you.
It doesn't mean placing your husband in the place of God. Jesus is Lord alone. I know of men who try to make their wives do things that are wrong and when put in that position, it is better to obey God, rather than man.
It doesn't mean you can't have independent thoughts and ideas, or that you are less intelligent, are fearful or timid, going around cowering under the will of a man. There is no loss of dignity in the concept of Biblical submission.
But real submission will indeed affirm the headship of the husband as a Scriptural concept. It's an acknowledgement of God designed authority.
Remember now, Ephesians was written to Christians. [saints at Ephesus] A lost person wouldn't like this message. This is why it is imperative to only marry a believer. V. 21 indicates it is a mutual submission, and we short circuit God's plan when we settle for less.
This passage follows the command to be filled with the Holy Spirit. And headship in the home is impossible to do right w/out God's help.
3 reasons why wives do well to obey God in the matter of submission:
1. It's scriptural.
v. 22 When you do it 'unto the Lord' it is fulfilling and not demeaning. If you don't, you can expect 4 problems:
• With the Lord--you can't be wrong w/ your spouse and right w/ God.
Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me:
• With your husband--there's something in the heart of every man that lets him know he is supposed to be the head of the home. It's just the way God built man. But the devil will try to get you to focus on the negative in your husband so you can justify not submitting to him.
ill.--remember records [lps]? That vinyl had 2 sides. You bought the side you wanted, but you also got the other side with it. Ladies, there was something about your husband that attracted you to him in the first place, but another side came with him. How could you know when you were dating that guy that he would use a fork tine to clean under his toenails? There was no way you could have foreseen that your football playing hero would later be shaped like a football?
The devil will try to unqualify him in your view, maybe spiritually, so you will end up not submitting because you feel he doesn't deserve it. However, if you submit anyway, you then free him up to be what he ought to be. If not, he'll either retreat and let you be the head of the house, or there will be a constant tug of war. Either way, you are asking for violent explosive outbursts because he is not in his proper role, and he knows it.
• With your children--because you will not be able to exercise authority over kids if you are not yourself under authority. The same is true for me as a pastor. I'm supposed to lead this congregation, but how can I effectively do that if I'm not under God's authority? If you are rebellious, your children will follow your example.
• With yourself--you'll become a frustrated individual with inner turmoil and confusion, because deep down you know your husband is to be the head of the home.
2. It's sensible.