A Messiah Who Understands the True Family
Text: Matt. 12:46-50
Introduction
1. Illustration: Rudyard Kipling once wrote about families, "all of us are we--and everyone else is they." A family shares things like dreams, hopes, possessions, memories, smiles, frowns, and gladness...A family is a clan held together with the glue of love and the cement of mutual respect. A family is shelter from the storm, a friendly port when the waves of life become too wild. No person is ever alone who is a member of a family.
2. While I can only speak for myself, that sounds like church to me! In my mind, my real family is my church family because their values, vision and purpose are closer to my own unsaved family members.
3. When we are in Christ:
a. The insiders are outsiders.
b. The outsiders are insiders.
4. Read Matt. 12:46-50
Proposition: When we give our lives to Christ, His family becomes our family.
Transition: With Christ...
I. The Insiders Are Outsiders (46-47).
A. Mother and Brothers Stood Outside
1. The devil tries to get those of us who have family struggles to think that we are all alone.
a. He tries to tell us that if we were better Christians all our family members would be saved too.
b. He tries to get us believe that if we can't get them saved we have failed as Christians.
c. He then tries to convince us that you might as well give up because at that way you'd all be going to hell together.
d. But this text...this text is proof that the devil is a liar...and the father of lies!
e. Because if Jesus had family problems we are in good company!
2. Matthew tells us, "As Jesus was speaking to the crowd..."
a. The expression "as Jesus was speaking to the crowds" transitions the narrative from the preceding section that focused on those outside to those within.
b. Matthew’s narrative has maintained a striking contrast between three groups: the disciples, the crowds, and the religious establishment of Israel.
c. Disciples are those who have responded positively to Jesus’ invitation to the gospel of the kingdom.
d. The crowds are those who are interested in Jesus’ message and ministry but who have not yet made a decision to enter the kingdom and become Jesus’ disciples.
e. The religious leaders are those who consistently oppose Jesus’ message and ministry (Wilkins, NIV Application Commentary, New Testament: Matthew, 454).
3. However, now we see a forth group emerge who are trying desperately to get Jesus attention...his own family. Matthew states, "his mother and brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him."
a. It is interesting that Matthew tells us that Jesus' Mother and Brothers were "outside."
b. If they were truly supportive of what Jesus was doing doesn't it seem to reason that they would be "inside" (Turner, Cornerstone Biblical Commentary: Matthew/Mark, 178)?
c. In fact, Matthew emphasizes their exclusion from Jesus inner circle by the repetition of the word "outside" (France, 497).
d. If they really believed in him they would not only have been inside, but they would have been helping him.
4. Then someone tells Jesus, “Your mother and your brothers are outside, and they want to speak to you.”
a. After the resurrection, Jesus' brothers eventually came to believe in Him, His brother James becoming the head of the Jerusalem church and author of the epistle that bears his name.
b. But during Jesus' preaching and teaching ministry there is no clear evidence that any member of His family other than Mary fully understood who He really was or trusted in Him as Savior
c. We are told specifically that His brothers did not believe in Him, and it may be that even His mother—despite the revelations to her before and after Jesus' birth and her magnificent confession at that time—did not yet personally trust in Jesus as her own Lord and Savior (MacArthur New Testament Commentary – Matthew 8-15).
5. So why did they want to speak to him?
a. Matthew gives no reason for why his family wishes to speak to him, but Mark indicates that earlier his family apparently went out from Nazareth to Capernaum because they heard reports of the commotion that Jesus’ ministry was causing.
b. They wanted to take control of Jesus and alter his ministry, because they thought that he was out of his mind, considering the claims he was making and his disruption of the religious status quo.
c. Along with this, it may be that they intend to bring Jesus to his senses as the eldest son, the one responsible to care for his mother and younger brothers and sisters after the death of Joseph (Wilkins, 454).
d. Mark 3:21 (NLT)
When his family heard what was happening, they tried to take him away. “He’s out of his mind,” they said.
e. So they didn't want to speak to him because they believed in him, but rather because they didn't believe in him.
B. New Person
1. Illustration: I remember when I gave my life to Christ that people's reaction was as extreme as my conversion. All of my drunken, burned-out partying buddies mourned that I had gone over to the other side. One of my sister-in-laws said it was just another phase I was going through (so far this phase has lasted 32 years!). One of my bother's asked my old-time Catholic mother, "so is Mark still a Jesus Freak?" Her response was, "I rather see him be a freak about Jesus than a freak on drugs!"
2. When we come to Christ we become new people.
a. 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV)
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.
b. Our old life is gone.
c. Our old desires are gone.
d. Our old priorities are gone.
e. The things that used to be important just aren't important anymore.
3. When we come to Christ, He replaces the old with something better.
a. Romans 12:2 (NLT)
Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.
b. God transforms our old life into something better.
c. God transforms our old desires into desires with meaning.
d. God transforms our old relationships with ones that will last.
4. When we come to Christ, we become a part of a new family-God's family.
a. John 1:12-13 (NLT)
12 But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God.
13 They are reborn—not with a physical birth resulting from human passion or plan, but a birth that comes from God.
b. Born of God
c. Born of the Spirit
d. Born into New Life!
5. However, some people may not rejoice with you.
a. 1 Peter 4:4-5 (NIV)
4 They think it strange that you do not plunge with them into the same flood of dissipation, and they heap abuse on you.
5 But they will have to give account to him who is ready to judge the living and the dead.
b. Your old friends may not understand.
c. Your co-workers may not understand.
d. Your blood relatives may not understand.
e. In fact, they may think you have lost your mind!
Transition: The opposite side of this reality is that...
II. The Outsiders Are Insiders (48-50).
A. Who Is My Mother/Brothers
1. As He so often did, Jesus got right down to the heart of the matter - how do we define family?
a. Jesus shows no disrespect in His actions or His words, however, neither would he abandon the work of the Kingdom on behalf of a family relationship (Horton, 257).
b. Jesus sees here a "teachable moment" to illustrate who his true family.
c. He does this with a question (v.48), an answer (v. 49), and an explanation (v. 50) (Turner, 178).
2. First Jesus asks the question, “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?”
a. With that context in mind, Mary and Jesus’ brothers arrive at the place where Jesus is speaking in order to escort him back to Nazareth.
b. Someone tells Jesus, "Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you."
c. But Jesus will not be deterred from his messianic mission, even if it means disruption of biological loyalties (Wilkins, 455).
d. By asking this question, Jesus not only defines the concept of family, but He redefines the true meaning of family.
3. He then answers the question when "he pointed to his disciples and said, 'Look, these are my mother and brothers.'"
a. Jesus was not disassociating himself from his family as much as he was showing the priority of our spiritual family (France, 497).
b. In fact, believers are even closer to Jesus than His natural family and closest relatives (Horton, 257).
c. The Lord's purpose in referring to His disciples as His mother and brothers was to teach that He invites the entire world into His intimate and divine family.
d. Anyone can enter His spiritual family by trusting in Him, and the family of God is the only family that ultimately matters (MacArthur New Testament Commentary – Matthew 8-15).
e. He has not come to abolish the family, for later he upholds the law that demands children honor their parents and rebukes those who develop traditions that allow loopholes in that law.
f. And we will see that after the Parable Discourse, Jesus does return to Nazareth, where his family is still living, to preach in the synagogue.
g. But Jesus is here demonstrating the preeminence of commitment to him and the kingdom of heaven, which places people in a new spiritual family (Wilkins, 455).
4. He then redefines family for all eternity with the explanation, "Anyone who does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother!”
a. Family relationships in the ancient world were often defined by hierarchy even more than by kinship ties, so that wives and especially children were expected to obey the father of the household.
b. Jesus can thus define his “mother, brothers and sisters” as those who obey his Father (Keener, The IVP Bible Background Commentary – New Testament).
c. It is a commitment that goes beyond a profession of allegiance, but requires "doing the will of the Father" (France, 497).
5. Jesus intentionally broadens the gender references to include women as his disciples by not only referring to mother and brother but also by bringing in "sister."
a. His message and ministry initiate a unique form of discipleship.
b. Within Judaism at that time, especially among the rabbis, only men could become a disciple of a rabbi and study the Torah.
c. But with Jesus, any person — woman or man, young or old, Gentile or Jew — who responds to the gospel of the kingdom and believes on him for eternal life is his disciple.
d. In other words, discipleship to Jesus is not defined by rabbinic models but by relationship to Jesus, which means obedience to the will of the Father.
e. The Old Testament prepared for this concept by stressing the importance of both the nation and the individual walking in the ways of God, which is now fulfilled in a discipleship to Jesus that creates a new family of God (Wilkins, 456).
B. Real Family
1. Illustration: According to a study of more than 500 family counselors, the following are the top traits of successful families:
*Communicating and listening *Affirming and supporting family members *Respecting one another *Developing a sense of trust *Sharing time and responsibility *Knowing right from wrong *Having rituals and traditions *Sharing a religious core *Respecting privacy (Focus on the Family Bulletin, December, 1988).
2. Real family is defined by common experience.
a. John 3:3 (NLT)
Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, unless you are born again, you cannot see the Kingdom of God.”
b. Unless you have been there you cannot understand.
c. Unless you have tasted it you cannot understand.
d. Ironically, we are all quick to criticize the apostle Thomas, but most of us are just like him. Unless we can put our finger in his hands, feet, and sides, we won't believe.
3. Real family is defined by common purpose.
a. 2 Corinthians 5:5 (NIV)
Now it is God who has made us for this very purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.
b. Without the Holy Spirit your purpose is self-centered.
c. With the Holy Spirit your purpose is Christ-centered.
4. In Christ our purpose is to:
a. Worship
b. Witness
c. Walk
d. Work
e. Welcome
5. Real family is defined by common foundation.
a. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 (NIV)
16 All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness,
17 so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
b. This Book is our Road Map
c. This Book is our Compass
d. This Book is our Instruction Manual
e. This is my Bible: I am what it says I am; I have what it says I have; I can do what it says I can do. Today, I will be taught the Word of God. I'll boldly confess. My mind is alert; my heart is receptive; I will never be the same. I am about to receive the incorruptible, indestructible, ever-living Seed of the Word of God. I'll never be the same - never, never, never! I'll never be the same, in Jesus' Name.
Transition: On Christ the Solid Rock I stand, all other ground is sinking stand.
Conclusion
1. In Christ:
a. Insiders are outsider
b. Outsiders are insiders
2. What are you today? Are you an outsider or an insider?
3. If you are an outsider, you can become an insider by just saying yes to Jesus.
4. If you are an insider, look around this room and see your real family.
a. Love them
b. Care for them
c. Encourage them
d. You can pick your friends, but you're stuck with your relatives!
