Summary: Talk 4 in in series. A look at how sound doctrine orders relationships within the church family.

It’s amazing what persistent teaching and training can do. Geoff Huegill (a successful Australian swimmer) lost 40 kg to win the 100m butterfly at the recent Commonwealth Games. The Sydney Morning Herald reported that ‘Huegill had feared disappearing under a pile of beer cans and pizza boxes before getting up and diving back into life two years ago’ (SMH, 9 Oct 10). Or as FoxTel put it, ‘From six packs to a six pack, Geoff Huegill’s dramatic weight loss has been Australia’s swimming’s gain’.

Teaching and training are essential to the Christian life. For this is the way that God’s elect are brought into the truth that leads to godliness. Whilst physical training is a good thing to do, spiritual training keeps us fit for eternity. In his letter to Timothy, Paul says, ‘For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come’ (1 Tim 4:8). And so it is that Titus is to train the Cretan church in godliness. In chapter 2, he is to teach the older men—then teach older women so they in turn can train the younger women. The younger men are to be taught strength of character. Slaves are to be taught to be subject to their masters.

Now we know that Paul left Titus on the island of Crete to straighten out what was left unfinished. The appointment of elders was important—men of appropriate character whose role is to encourage others by sound doctrine and OPPOSE those who teach error. Crete was littered with false teachers who were, according to verse 14, teaching Jewish myths relating to purity—how the cross of Christ is not enough to make us clean before God. The church must silence these men, they should be rebukeD taught the gospel—and the elders are to lead the way.

With a strategy in place to deal with false teachers, Paul turns to the life of the church. Titus is to train the Cretan church in godliness. Come with me to Titus 2:1, ‘You must teach what is in accord with sound doctrine’ (Tit 2:1).

You must teach the Christians on Crete about Christian living. And then we realise that we also should be taught sound doctrine. And the reason is given in verses 11 and 12 which explains the instructions in verses 1 to 10. ‘For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age’.

Titus must teach the grace that glorifies God. Teaching is absolutely fundamental to Christ-like Christianity. For to know the truth of the knowledge of God, and to trust in that truth, will lead to changed lives. We are not in heaven yet, we are in this world and we very much feel the effects of sin. And how are we to be Christ-like in this present age? The grace of God teaches us, and as we believe it, we are redeemed from wickedness and transformed into a people eager to do what is good.

Tit 2:1–10 is a lovely picture of the church family in action. The trend in churches these days is to separate the older from younger—by-and-large family services have been replaced by youth services and traditional services. Following wider trends, like the world our churches have become social sieves that separate the generations. Music is often the dividing line which shows how little we understand music. On the contrary, the Lord who made us insists on inter-generational mixing.

Paul instructs Titus on what this means for various groups in the church. Firstly, to the older men and the older women. But Who are these older people? When is a person ‘old’? In the world of ancient Greece this could have meant someone as young as fifty. So maybe we should take fifty as a general rule of thumb. Anyone older than fifty is an old man—I don’t like the sound of that! Others say that ‘older’ should not be thought of in absolute years, but in terms of relative ages. So then anyone older than you is the older person Paul has in mind.

Not only does Paul have physical age in mind—he has in mind spiritual age—spiritual maturity. This doesn’t discount age but doesn’t necessarily rely upon it, either. Spiritually mature people are often older in years and they ought to be mentoring those who are younger in the faith. We must ensure that the baton of godliness is passed from one generation to another. Different ages need mentoring in different ways so that all ages are taught to say ‘“No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives’ (Tit 2:12).

So Paul starts with instruction to the older people. Come with me to Tit 2:2, ‘Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance’. These are the areas where older men tend to fail and Paul corrects these general shortcomings. Although ‘temperate’ may refer to alcohol, more likely it refers to being sober in the sense of ‘clear-headed’. An older man must not rush blindly into situations like younger men tend to do. The older man must be restrained and circumspect in his thinking.

Is it not the desire of every older man to be respected? The apostle reminds older men they must be people worthy of that respect. Do you older men feel the challenge to live as an example and inspiration to younger Christian men? Will you show them what a godly man looks like? Are you prepared to teach the younger men about strength and masculinity in God’s world? The older men must inspire the younger men to secretly say to themselves, ‘I want to be like him’.

I want to be like George Dickman—I want to be an older bloke who is temperate and worthy of respect. But the sad fact is that many men don’t continue to grow and develop and mature as Christians right through to the end of their lives. I have a friend of mine who started the Christian life with great enthusiasm and faithfulness. As a youth he went to every Bible study, he deepened his understanding of the gospel by reading good books and he clearly articulated his faith. Now he’s my age and he has faded away. He’s still a Christian, but he is not the Christian man of his younger days. The apostle doesn’t want this to happen—not to the older men and not to any of us.

I want to practice Christ-like Christianity. Back to verse 2 and I want to be a man who shows self-control in challenging situations. In chapter 1, we saw that ‘self-control’ is a qualification for eldership. And now it appears as an important attribute for older men who tend to become impatient with the arrogance of youth. The self-controlled man is prudent, thoughtful and restrained. He is a sensible man; a man known for his sound judgment. His speech, his behaviour, the decisions that he makes, the counsel that he gives, his whole approach to life will bear the stamp of sober-mindedness.

Then in verse 2, the older man is to be sound in three areas: in faith, love and endurance. Older men, ensure you have a healthy trust in God.

When Paul left Crete, his boat was caught in a violent storm (Acts 27). The men had given up all hope of being saved. But Paul had received a promise from God that not one person would be lost, and he was sure that this promise would be kept. So as the boat threatened to sink, Paul stood up and urged the men, ‘Keep up your courage, for not one of you will be lost, only the ship will be destroyed’ (Acts 27:22). Paul took God at his word and older men you are to do the same and you are to encourage others to do the same.

The older man is to be sound in love. He is to have a healthy love for God and others. Remember that true love is other-centred love. Don’t be self-centred, don’t live the allusion of career and don’t become retirement lazy. Do not waiver, but endure right to the end. For what can be more loving than to serve others as Christ has served you? What can be more loving than to spend your final years sharing the gospel with others? What can be more loving than mentoring younger men and modelling holiness in the household of faith?

Older men, while you have your health (which is a gift from God), devote yourselves to doing what is good. Or as Paul says in 1 Cor 15:58, ‘devote yourself fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labour in the Lord is not in vain’.

Now Titus, this is what you are to teach the older women. ‘Likewise (verse 3), teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God’.

So older women—here is a word for you! You need the grace of God which teaches you to reject worldly passions and to adore yourselves with the beauty of the Lord. We’re not talking rules, we’re talking relationships. Remember those beautiful words at the end of Proverbs, ‘Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised’ (Prov 31:30).

Older ladies, make sure that your relationship with God is right. ‘Be reverent in the way you live’. This is the only time the Greek word for ‘reverent’ is found in the New Testament. Something extraordinary is happening. This is a word especially for you. Be reverent, be devout, be holy as though you are a priestess in a Temple. Keep yourself pure and undefiled. Love what is good. Campbell says, ‘Others may please themselves in the way that they live and recognize no higher authority than their own wills. Older Christian women are to be different. It is to be apparent from the way they live that their lives are dedicated to God’.

A reverent life will avoid slander. Speak with self-control and do not malign anyone. Don’t spread rumours about people, don’t say unkind things about others and damage their reputation. No such speech is to be heard on the lips of an older Christian woman. Her speech is to be honouring to God and respectful to those around her.

And then don’t be addicted to wine which tends to loosen the tongue. It sounds like an odd thing to say to older Christian women. The temptation is to cope with loneliness, problems at home, difficult neighbours and friends—its so easy to numb the senses by pulling out the wine. Drinking too much was a common practice amongst older women in the first century—and it still happens today! Such behaviour has no place amongst Christian women who are to be reverent in the way they live.

Older women, be holy for the Lord your God is holy. And such a life prepares you for a mentoring role. Look at verse 4—the younger Christian women need you! ‘Then you can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God’ (Tit 2:4–5).

Titus, who is a younger man himself, is not too mentor the young ladies. The reasons are obvious and includes the possibility of sexual immorality. One-to-one mentoring younger women is the role of the older women who are much more qualified.

The older women are to train the younger women. The word for ‘training’ means to encourage, urge, advise, mentor. Counsel our younger women to love their husbands—who I assume are sometimes ‘unlovable’. In Colossians and Ephesians, a husband is commanded to love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Here in Titus the picture is rounded out. The love of a husband is to be matched by the love of a wife.

Does it sound surprising that younger women are to be trained to love their husbands? Prior to her wedding a young woman may imagine that nothing could be easier than loving her husband. But things change over time. There may be things about a husband that make loving him difficult. Or the difficulty in loving him may lie with the young wife herself. Here is where the older, more experienced Christian woman can help with appropriate counsel.

This extends to children. I can think of few situations in life harder than a young women being confined at home day after day with small children—sleep deprived—lonely—coupled with expectations from her husband. Please notice that the Word of God is so wonderfully realistic. There is no idealism here. There are no assumptions that life for the younger married woman is an easy one. And one of God’s provisions for you is an older, more experienced Christian woman who knows the gospel and the ropes of family life and who can help with appropriate counsel.

When things aren’t well at home with husband and children, the temptation is to compromise on self-control and purity (verse 5). Self-control is one of those words that pops up regularly. It’s been a quality required of elders (Tit 1:8), older men (Tit 2:2) and for younger men (Tit 2:6). The focus is on the mind, the strength to resist doing the wrong thing especially in the area of purity. Marriage does not exempt a woman from sexual temptation. She may find herself attracted to another man. She may even fall into adultery. Knowing all that, God insists on purity. A young Christian woman is to be faithful to her husband—even if things should be difficult in the marriage.

Younger women are to be ‘busy at home’. That does not mean that married women should never have a job outside the home. It does mean that for a young wife, her home is to have the priority. Old-fashioned as it may sound, it is the thing that is to come first. A wife must attend to matters within the home and this does not alleviate the responsibilities of the husband. But she cannot neglect the home for the sake of other interests.

Another fruit of the Spirit is ‘kindness’ and younger women are reminded to be ‘kind’. Paul is still thinking about the home. In the first century, if a Christian woman was wealthy she probably had servants. Her duty was to be kind to them and not harsh. And this is to extend to the way a wife relates to others in her home.

The apostle moves on and says that younger Christian women are to be ‘subject to their husbands’. Let’s put these words into some perspective. The role of the husband is to be a loving leader. The husband is to love his wife as Christ loves his church. What does that mean? Does it mean that husbands can be tyrants? ‘Where’s my supper’? ‘Turn on the television’! ‘Bring me my suit’! ‘Have you washed my shirts yet’? That’s not loving leadership—that’s dictatorship. Does Christ love his church that way?

‘Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church’. Does Christ order us about? Does he demand things? The love that Christ has for the church is a sacrificial, other-centred love and this is the type of loving leader a husband is meant to be. A man who protects and embraces his wife all his life.

Younger women, learn to ‘be subject to your husbands’. This is a joyful, voluntary response to the loving leadership of your husband. Some women are happy that their husband is the head, as long as they can be the neck and move the head around. But this is not what the godly way.

Many a female hackle goes up when these words are heard—‘submission’ and ‘be subject to your husband’. And the way its sometimes taught makes me glad I’m not a women! Selwyn Hughes gives us a delightful definition of what submission really means: ‘submission is a disposition to yield to a husband’s authority and a readiness to support his leadership in everything that does not lead to sin’.

The world is so confused about relationships and Christians are too ready to enter into that confusion. What did the Lord Jesus do? As the second person in the Trinity he submitted to his Father’s will. There is an irreversible order in the Trinity and the Son gladly submitted to his loving Father, a path that took him to the cross.

And Christ also models the loving leadership of the husband. As the loving leader of a new humanity he became the head of the church. And husbands are to love their wife as Christ loves the church and the younger women are to learn to be subject to their husbands. The end of verse 5 suggests that when the Christian community clearly organises itself around the lordship of Christ, this is a wonderful and powerful testimony to the world. We are to live in such a way ‘so that no-one will malign (or dishonour) the word of God’. At stake is the reputation of the gospel.

For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all people. This grace ‘teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age’ (Tit 2:11–12).