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ARE YOU A CHRISTIAN?


Two men met on a plane and one man asked the other, "Are you a Christian?"

"Yes I am."

"Wonderful! Are you Protestant, Catholic, or Orthodox?"

"I’m a Protestant."

"That’s great. So am I. Are you Calvinist or Arminian in your theology?"

"I’m happy to say that I’m a staunch Calvinist."

"That’s fantastic. So am I. If you don’t mind my asking, are you a Calvinistic Baptist or a Calvinistic Presbyterian?"

"I’m a Calvinistic Baptist."

"What a coincidence. I’m a Calvinistic Baptist, too. Are you a Northern Calvinistic Baptist or a Southern Calvinistic Baptist?"

"By heritage and by choice I am a Northern Calvinistic Baptist."

"Unbelievable! So am I. May I ask if you are a Northern Regular Calvinistic Baptist or a Northern Conservative Calvinistic Baptist?"

"I’m a Northern Conservative Calvinistic Baptist."

"This is truly astounding. There are only 200 of us in the world—and two of us happened to meet on this plane. Tell me, sir, would you happen to be a Northern Conservative Calvinistic Baptist Convention of 1844 or a Northern Conservative Calvinistic Baptist Convention of 1868?"

"I am a Northern Conservative Calvinistic Baptist Convention of 1844."

"This is a miracle! Are you a Northern Conservative Calvinistic Baptist Convention of 1844 King James Version or a Northern Conservative Calvinistic Baptist Convention of 1844 New International Version?"

"I am a Northern Conservative Calvinistic Baptist of 1844 New International Version."

With that the first man ceased to smile, turned away and refused to speak any further to that heretic.


Satan loves it when Christians split hairs. First we split hairs, then we split churches. One major danger for every church is DISUNITY

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