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TOP TEN LIST OF WHAT MOMS REALLY WANT FOR MOTHER'S DAY



10. To be able to eat a whole candy bar (alone) and drink a Coke

without any "floaters."


9. To have a 14-year-old answer a question without rolling her eyes

in that "Why is this person my mother?" way.


8. Five pounds of chocolate that won’t add twenty.


7. A shower without a child peeking through the curtain with a "Hi

ya, Mom!" just as I put razor to my ankle.


6. A full-time cleaning person who looks like Brad Pitt.


5. For a teenager to announce, "Hey, Mom! I got a full scholarship

and a job all in the same day!"


4. A grocery store that doesn’t have candy, gum, and cheap toys

displayed at the checkout line.


3. To have a family meal without a discussion about bodily

secretions.


2. To be able to step on a plane with toddlers and not have some

pencil-neck-yuppie-geek moan, "Oh, no! Why me?"


1. Four words: Fisher Price Play Prison


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