Sermon Illustrations

Here are some examples of instructions that, for one reason or another, weren’t made very clearly:

• “Do not sit in chair without being fully assembled”

• “Please take time to look over the brochure enclosed with your family”

• at a private school grounds: “No trespassing without permission”

• brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo, Japan: When passage of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.”

• at a zoo: “Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.”

• cemetery in PA - “Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves.”

• highway in OH - “Drive slower when wet.”

• in the vestry of a New England church: “Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished.”