Sermon Illustrations

Jeff Foxworthy is a comedian who became famous through his “You Might Be A Redneck If …” routine. Well, I came across some “You Might Be A Preacher If …” statements.

You might be a preacher if …

· You’ve waded in a creek wearing a necktie

· You’d rather negotiate with terrorists than the church organist

· A church picnic is no picnic

· You’ve ever wanted to fire the church and form a congregation search committee

· You’ve been tempted to take up an offering at a family reunion

· You’ve ever wanted to give the soundman some feedback of your own

· You’ve ever wanted to lay hands on a deacon, and you weren’t thinking of praying for him

· Your sermons have a happy...

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