Summary: We are created as relational beings...so why is it all so hard. It all starts with treating one another like the holy creations we are. Here are four helpful questions to help in relationships.
Let me start out by just telling you guys that I am so excited about tonight. Dating and relationships is a topic that I have a huge passion for because I know how difficult they can be; especially during junior and senior high. Throughout my life I have had 3½ girl friends…yes 3½.
The first came in 8th grade where I dated this girl for a month. It was cool because we almost had the same last name. Mine is Kircher and her last name was Kerr. I think we went to the mall once and other than that we just talked on the phone. It lasted about a month and then she dumped me at school by giving me this note under the table in our class room.
After that I didn’t date again until the summer before my senior year of high school. I dated this girl named Diane who loved baseball almost as much as I do. We dated about a month kind of. See we started going out at the beginning of July. After about two weeks I went away on vacation with my family for a week. The day before I got back, she went away with her family for vacation for the next week. Then, the day before she got back, I left again for a week and half mission trip in Canada. When I got back, I felt like things weren’t lining up so I broke up with here…over the phone.
Then, during my senior year, there was Jenna. Yea…I was stupid and crazy. Jenna was a girl from my youth group who I decided was amazing and that “God had told me” I was going to marry. The only problem was that God hadn’t told her that. I asked her out by sending her a dozen roses on Valentines Day with a little card. She said yes, kind of. See, neither of us wanted to really date so we came up with this thing we called frating…friends but dating. It was stupid, I know.
I ended up though ending it after a month, on IM, because I found out she was going to prom with this other guy from my church but never even told me about it. The whole thing was a mess. I was crushed. Later on, I found out from a friend that she never wanted to go out with me to begin with but didn’t want to hurt my feelings, which, you know, feels really good to find out.
Then, there was Melissa my freshman year of college and we all know how that ended up. So, all this to say, I haven’t had a ton of girlfriends compared to some people but I learned a heck of a lot from my experiences, from my youth group leaders, and from my Youth Pastor. Tonight, I would like to humbly share with you some of the things I have learned later in my high school years that I wish I knew when I was in seventh grade. And hopefully, it will save you guys from having to go through some of the painful situations I had to.
To guide us in our conversation, grab your Bibles and open them to Genesis 2:7, 18-24.
***Read Genesis 2:7, 18-24***
To start out, I need all the guys to stand up. Guys, take a look at these young ladies sitting around you and I repeat after me. “Ladies, you are not pieces of meat. You are not objects. You are wonderful creations of God and I will treat you like that.” Guys, you can have a seat. Girls, your turn, stand up, take a look at these young men and repeat after me. “Guys, you are not just objects to use for what I want; whether it is love, acceptance, status, or to feel good about myself. You are wonderful creations of God and I will treat you like that.” Thanks girls, you can have a seat.
Whenever you have a conversation about dating and relationships, I believe that this is where you have to start. “God created human beings in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” We are not mistakes and we are not just random projects thrown together. Every single one of us is a wonderfully made masterpiece created by God; holy and special in our Creator’s eyes.
When I dated Diane in high school, the first time I went over her house, her Dad came down the stairs with a machete in hand, saying he was “weed whacking” out back. He definitely made me think about how to treat his daughter when we were together. After I broke up with her, I heard from some friends that he basically threatened to beat the crap out of me if he ever saw me again. As funny as it may sound, this is the kind of love God has for each of us. As we interact with each other and think about boyfriends and girlfriends, we need to picture our Heavenly Father standing there, watching us, giving us this look that says, “You protect my creation!”