Summary: Fourth down is your last chance to clean up the messes you may have made in your marriage.
4 Play: Four Keys to a Winning Marriage Series
Fourth Down: Teachability
Feb. 21, 2008 FBC, Chester Mike Fogerson, Pastor
A 30-Day Sex Challenge at Relevant Church in Ybor City, Fl.
1 Make time! "Sometimes life gets in the way, our jobs get in the way."~Paul Wirth
2 Catalyst for 50% divorce rate (unchurched/churched)
3 4th down is your last chance to do something before the other team gets the ball.
B If we asked God what His thoughts are on divorce, we’d hear Him say, "For I hate divorce ," says the LORD...Mal 2:16a (NASB)
1 Divorce is not God’s will for marriages.
2 Divorce is possibly seen as an option with unflagging adultery or abuse.
a It was said, ’WHOEVER SENDS HIS WIFE AWAY, LET HIM GIVE HER A CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE’; 32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. Matt 5:31-32 (NASB)
b On the latter (abuse), I’m aligned on one’s ability to divorce an unbelieving spouse. Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife? 17 Only, as the Lord has assigned to each one, as God has called each, in this manner let him walk. And so I direct in all the churches. 1 Cor 7:15-17 (NASB) No believing husband/wife would violate his (or her) spouse.
c Abuse is not leaving the toilet seat up, insensitive to your mom, nagging when you go hunting.
3 Divorce is not unforgivable, unpardonable...at times it’s allowed (divorce does happen, I’m just saying it happens too often).
C We’ve looked at 3 plays so far: focus, commitment, & honor.
1 Fourth down: teachability
a Teachability is putting high enough value on your relationship to ask for advice, get cousel...do something different.
b Pride stops! (I can handle this mess-I don’t need help!)
2 At home, if you make a mess, you pick it up.
a Imagine spilling milk on the carpet (the longer it sits, soaks...stinks)
b Would you like to pick up some messes today?
3 (Transitional sentence) Let’s learn how to deal with some of the most common messes couples make in their marriages (be teachable!)
I The first mess we must learn to clean up is honoring one another.
1 Men, we have some messes that only we can pick up.
a You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. 1 Peter 3:7 (NASB) Your job/ministry is to honor your wife as a weaker vessel.
aa Honor: value, see as precious, transliterated (time)
bb When we fail to honor her as the weaker vessel (partner NIV), we make a mess.
b Honor as a weaker vessel means different things to different couples, but it may look like:
aa Opening the door for her (car, Wal-Mart)