1. The Holy Spirit helps a counselor, who knows how to listen, understand what is REAL to their counselee. A person’s reality consists of what they regard as being actual in its true nature, both visible and invisible things. A leader develops the insight to get to know each person’s perspectives by understanding their basic assumptions about reality, their essential allegiances to what is true and what are the constant facts that they consider true without any equivocations. The writer of Hebrews wrote, "Now faith is the assurance (the confirmation, the title deed) of the things we hope for, being the proof of things we do not see and the conviction of their reality (faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses)." (Heb. 11:1) Ask the Lord to give you a greater ability to listen and understand every individual’s perspective by beginning to appreciate their basic views of reality. Trust the Lord to help you to move each individuals’ perspective to a higher level of maturity as they base their realities on a greater intimacy with God.
2. The Holy Spirit enlightens the eyes of a listening counselor to what each counselee considers to be TRUE. A person’s idea of what is true is determined by the standard they use to measure if something is factual. When a person is faced with a difficult decision, one can know an individual’s truth by their actions, attitudes and speech. Also, a counselor will try to gain an idea of whether truth is considered to be objectively or subjectively genuine. Be like Paul and pray for yourself and those you counsel this prayer: "I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe." (Eph. 1:18,19) Ask the Lord to give you the eyes and ears to really understand what your counselee considers to be true in all situations. Trust the Lord to help you move each individual’s perspective of truth closer to what Jesus meant when He said, "You will know (fully experience) the truth and the truth will set you free." (John 8:31,32)
3. The Holy Spirit gives discernment, to listening counselors, to what each counselee truly BELIEVES. When life becomes difficult, belief is made clear by what and whom an individual puts their trust in. If a person really trusts in Jesus Christ and His teaching, that individual will manifest the fruits of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control. These fruits reveal a trusting and obedient relationship with the Lord. Ask the Lord to give you greater discernment to help you understand what your counselee really believes in all situations. Trust the Lord to help you teach your counselee how to grow in faith as Abraham did by staggering not at the promise of God through unbelief, but grew strong in faith, being fully persuaded that what God had promised, He was able to perform." (Rom. 4:20,21)
4. The Holy Spirit gives insights, to listening counselors, to what each counselee VALUES above all else. When faced with adversity, all people are forced to rank what is important to them in order of their greatest values. A wise counselor will observe how an individual prioritizes their use of time, resources and abilities in order to understand their most important values. Effective counselors help their counselees learn how to surrender their cultural values for those things that Christ values most. Jesus said, "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters - yes, even his own life (In comparison with his love for Me) - he cannot be my disciple." (Luke 14:26) Ask the Lord to give you greater insight into counselees’ real values so as to guide them more to adapt Christ’s value system, perspective and commitments.
5. The Holy Spirit provides counsel, to listening counselors, about what causes a counselee to ACT the way they do. Many people behave in certain ways because they are following the example and conditioning of their parents. A wise counselor will be able to understand a great deal about a person’s perspective by observing the way an individual acts toward people in a variety of situations. Many people fail to do what God expects them to do because their behavior is conditioned more by fear than by faith. Ask the Lord to help you bring your counselee to a higher level of mature perspective by training them to practice, obey and complete all that God commands them to do in the scriptures. Jesus said, "Teach them to OBEY all that I have commanded them." (Matt. 28:19) Ask the Lord to help you bring people to a higher level of behavioral obedience and perspective by providing them with a living examples of a Christ-like lifestyle and ministry.