Summary: So many people are hurting in their marriages today. This simple, yet in-depth message, can help married couples enrich their relationships and find peace in troubled times.

o The Bible has a lot to say about "Words"

o Words are the "Currency of Life

o Imagine a world without words…


A. Life and Death are in the power of our tongues. - Proverbs 18:20-22

1. Our words are seeds - V.20

2. Every word we speak will carry a harvest with it. (Good or Bad)

3. We "choose" life and death with our words which are "seeds".

4. We need to take responsibility for our words.

o What is our mouth producing?

B. In context this is talking about how we talk to each other in marriage…

1. V.22 - When we group these Scriptures together we find that it is talking about finding a wife and obtaining favor from the Lord. (Your wife brings you favor from the Lord!)

o Your marriage will never be better than your mouth. - Jimmy Evans


A. V.33 - Jesus calls our hearts "tree's" and our words "fruit".

1. Bad Words - Bad Tree

2. Good Words - Good Tree

B. V.33,34 - What's in our hearts will come out of our mouths!

1. The way we get our mouth sanctified is we get our heart sanctified. (If we clean up our hearts our mouths will follow…)

C. V.36 - Casual speech is dangerous

1. Idle words - How many times have you heard someone say, "Well… we were just talking. We didn't really mean it!"

2. V.37 - By our words we are justified or condemned… WORDS MATTER!

D. If you want to change your life… change your talk!

1. If you want to change your marriage… Start with your talk

2. If you want to strengthen a friendship… Start with your talk

3. If you want people to treat you better at work… Start with your talk

o YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW (Words are seeds…)


o Ephesians 5:33 ESV - However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

A. Husbands are to learn their wives. Study her…

1. We prioritize and work to live with our wives according to knowledge…

o 1 Peter 3:7 ESV - Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

2. Even in the difficult times

o Colossians 3:18 ESV - Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.

o Colossians 3:19 ESV - Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.

B. V.26 - Cleansed by Words

1. Christ sanctified and cleansed the Church with the Word. The lives of believers are cleansed as they hear the words of Christ and obey them.

2. As husbands we sanctify (set our wives apart for ourselves) by cleansing (washing away anxiety, distress, insecurities and worry and by loving her…) with our words.

o Words mean a lot to a man but they mean MUCH MORE to a woman!

C. V.27 - Presented Her to Himself

1. In the Greek, the word "own" occurs six times in verses 22-33. (Donna is my "own" wife. She isn't someone else's… She is mine.)

o The driving force of this Scripture passage is that a man must take responsibility for his "own" wife! We are to shelter and provide for her all that she needs for the rest of her life!

D. V.33 - Husbands are to "Love" their wives and wives are to "Respect" their husbands!

1. God knew that a wife's primary need was love and that a husbands primary need is respect.

2. The University of Washington studied 2000 couples for 20 years. Among the things they discovered are the following:

o 85% of men withdraw during marital conflict… The wife see's this as an act of hostility…

o Women criticize or complain during marital conflict… The husband see's this as an act of disrespect…

o When a woman feels unloved she tends to react in way that feels disrespectful to her husband.

o When a husband feels disrespected he tends to react in a way that feels unloving to his wife.

3. The Cure: A man's love will motivate his wife's respect and a woman's respect will motivate a man's love! In short…

o If you want your husband to love you more… Show him more respect!

o If you want your wife to respect you more… Show her more love!

o The key to communication is mutual understanding.

o (Read the book "Love and Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs)

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