Summary: One Italian man became so frustrated with his wife’s badgering that he had himself arrested just to have one night’s peace in a jail cell. However, ten minutes after being securely locked away for the night because of pretending to be publicly intoxicated
Avoid Over-reacting to Provocations (James 1:19)
We all have a tendency to over react when provoked. Some have more difficulty than others controlling their emotions.
Illustration: One Italian man became so frustrated with his wife’s badgering that he had himself arrested just to have one night’s peace in a jail cell. However, ten minutes after being securely locked away for the night because of pretending to be publicly intoxicated, he was shocked by what he saw.
Apparently, the wife learned about his plot and also got herself arrested so that she could be strategically have a captive audience for her complaints. Since the jailhouse had only two cells, she was placed in the cell immediately adjacent to her
husband. Shakespeare said, "Oh what tangled webs we weave when we practice to deceive."
This is may be one of the reasons that James wrote, "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." (James 1:19) Only when our mind, will and emotions are under the control of the Spirit of God can we accomplish His perfect will.
In our fast paced world there are many temptations to respond quickly without weighing our words. However, the following principles can help prevent many problems caused by uncontrolled over reactions.
1. Choose your words carefully before you react. Solomon wrote, "A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered." (Proverbs 27:17) Practicing the discipline of restraint is especially important in our conversations.
Illustration: A wrathful man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger allays contention. --Proverbs 15:18
What’s a six-letter word for the way parents too often communicate with their children?
Cross words so often fly between parents and children that children must surely be puzzled.
After all, parents who love Jesus are supposed to be noted for their love. We are supposed to be controlled by the Holy Spirit. We are supposed to be able to control our cross words.
The book of Proverbs has some great words of wisdom for those who ask, "How do I stop yelling at my kids?" A nine-letter word holds the key: r-e-s-t-r-a-i-n-t.
Look at Proverbs 15:1-2. "A soft answer turns away wrath." To make that work takes self-control. "A harsh word stirs up anger." Harsh words aren’t restrained. "The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly." The unrestrained tongue speaks first and checks the facts later. "But the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness." A foolish person lets words come out uncontrollably.
When we use cross words to communicate with our children, we must remember how confusing it is. They are puzzled when we don’t show the love we talk about. Restraint can end the cross word puzzle. --JDB
When you communicate, use words
That heal and nourish life
Instead of hurling angry words
That wound and stir up strife. --Sper
Sharp words can dull respect. (Our Daily Bread)
2. Choose your companions carefully before you react out of bad peer pressure. The first Psalm writer wrote, "Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord." (Psa. 1:1,2) It is too easy to conform to the negative pressures of carnal friends who can influence one to become cynical.