Summary: This is Sermon 2 of 6 in the Family Series 2003 at Calvary Baptist. Husbands, love your wives. Do we really have a clue what all that means? Here's some help from the Scriptures.

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Calvary Baptist Church

May 18, 2003

This is message number two of six on the family, beginning with Mother’s Day and ending on Father's day.

ILLUS: A woman went to the police station to report her husband as missing. She described him as "29 years old, six foot three, athletic, and handsome." The sergeant shook his head. "Wait a minute, lady. I know your husband. He's 50, short, and overweight." The woman said, "Sure he is, but who wants him back?"

Men, I hope today we can get you in shape so your wife will keep you!

TEXT: Col 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.


Husband - OE, from house and freeholder.

These were radical words when Paul wrote them. The wife was expected to serve the husband, bear children, work. In return, a wife in Roman times would receive basic provision, but honor and respect and love could not automatically be expected. Paul ties all love to the love that Christ has for his church.

Some husband may say, I love my wife.

1. I love her every night. No, that is the Greek word eros, and it is not used here.

2. Or, I love her like a friend. We get together at times and do things. No, that is philos (friendly affection), and neither is it used here.

3. The word that is used here is a word that is very rare outside of the Christian literature of that day. It is the word agape. It is the deep love that Christ has for each of us. In fact, some scholars used to think that this word was made up by Christian writers. Though they did not invent it, the certainly used it. We are to love our wives as Christ loved the Church.

There are some old ideas that are ridiculed today. But they still work. We have gone from growing our own food to buying processed foods. Have you ever thought that the object of the frozen food industry is to provide tasty food as cheaply as possible? Your heart problems and cancer are way down the road and could never be linked directly to them. So they fill it full of nitrates and other preservatives, load it with salt and fat, and we buy it in droves. The result is a level of new instances of heart disease and cancer that is astounding. We are so smart aren't we? The same is true with the Bible's teaching on the family. Some mock and laugh while they are on their second and third marriages. Father's day finds families sending cards to three and four addresses. And the children suffer. We are so smart aren't we?

If we are to survive, and make a dent in saving our families, we must return to traditional, biblical family values. The new ways have been tried and found wanting!

QUOTE: The proof is in the pudding, and Dr. Spock's pudding is sour!


The biblical love of the husband should be a love of . . .

L Leadership

1 Cor 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

ILLUS: The little wuss of a man that had to pray about taking brother Maze Jackson to a meeting. "You go tell her that you need to do it." He came back with a black eye and said, "Preacher, that stuff may work at your house but it doesn't work at mine."

• A two-headed creature is a monster.

• Partnerships are among the least popular styles of business because the are so doomed to failure.

• Leadership is not a bossy, driving, in your face drill sergeant!

• As we shall se, leadership is more responsibility than privilege!

• Some who crave leadership in reality are craving power.

• They will soon see that it is not always an enviable position.

1. Lead your home.

2. Lead in discipline - Don't wimp out and dump it all of on your wife.

3. Lead in maintenance.

4. Lead in finances - Don't spend the family's future on your latest toy!

5. Lead in spiritual matters.

Ephes. 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

QUOTE: The first step in becoming a Christian husband is to become a Christian!

O Offering

1. Offer yourself exclusively to her. And she should know it.

Women are very territorial when it comes to their husband.

ILLUS: A man worked in an office with several attractive ladies. His wife, constantly jealous, had a list of questions ready every day. Then she would examine his coat. If she found a blond hair she would accuse, "You're having an affair with a blond woman." If she found a red hair, black hair, brown hair the accusations would come. Finally, the man bought a lint brush and kept it in the car. After looking his coat over and finding nothing, he expected a smile. Instead, she begin to bawl. "What's wrong honey?" he asked. Don't touch me she screamed. Now you're having an affair with a bald woman!

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