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Summary: 2006 Mother’s Day Sermon

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Someone has written, ‘Confession is good for the soul.’ This morning, for a few moments, all mothers present get to experience their own personal and unique confession, okay?

From the website, corsinet.com, I am going to read a list of ‘mom-isms.’ (1) ‘Mom-isms’ are things that moms say or have said.

They will appear on the screen and after I read each of them, I will ask for a show of hands (from moms only) to indicate if they have ever said them. Okay? Here we go…

(2) All I do is follow you around, picking up after you like some maid. (2A) Answer me when I ask you a question! (2B) Beds are NOT made for jumping on.

(3) Are you going out dressed like that? (3A) Did you brush your teeth? (3B) Go play outside! It’s a beautiful day!

(4) Money does NOT grow on trees. (4A) Is your homework finished? (4C) When you have kids of your own you’ll understand.

Finally, (5) You just ate an hour ago! (5A) Who are you going with? Do I know them? (5B) Go ask your father.

Now, doesn’t that feel better?

Have you ever wondered what famous mothers said to their famous children? Here are just a few: (Also from corsinet.com)

(6) Abraham Lincoln’s mother was once quoted as saying, "Again with the stovepipe hat, Abe? Can’t you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"

(7) There was Batman’s mom, (aka Mrs. Wayne) who was overheard to say after Bruce Wayne (aka) Batman was looking at the Bat mobile, “It’s a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the insurance will be!"

(8) There is even a quote from Goldilocks, mother after her run in with the three bears. "I’ve got a bill here for a busted chair from the bear family. You know anything about this Goldie?"

(9) Even the great Albert Einstein could not escape his mother’s attention one day when she said, “But, Albert, it’s your senior picture. Can’t you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something....?"

(10) There was Jonah, yes that Jonah, whose mom was heard to say, "That’s a nice story, but now tell me where you’ve really been for the past 3 days!"

(11) Finally, mothers of great inventors have been known to keep their inventive siblings on earth. Mothers like Thomas Edison’s mom who said to him after he told her about the light bulb. "Of course I’m proud that you invented the electric light bulb, dear. Now turn off that light and get to bed!"

Finally, in keeping with the title of my sermon, here are a few lessons learned by others from their mom. (I shared some of these a few years ago, but these are new lessons that have been learned.)

(12) My mother taught me about (12A) WEATHER. "This room of yours looks like a tornado went through it." (12B) My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"

(13) My mother taught me about ENVY.

"There are millions of children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do." (13A) My mother taught me about GENETICS. "You’re just like your father."

(14) My mother taught me about WISDOM. (14A) "When you get to be my age, you’ll understand. Finally, my mother taught me about FEAR. (14B)"One day you’ll have a child who’ll do the same things to you."


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