Summary: Sermon by Dr. Tim Pollock
God designed marriage to be the number one priority in our lives outside of our relationship with the Lord. It should be even closer than the biological connection of a mother and her child. As wonderful as it is to focus on your children, the most precious of all relationships is marriage!
Let’s Examine the Six Aspects of a Joyful Marriage:
1. A Good Marriage is a Place of Sanctity and Honor
I see sanctity and honor in Proverbs 12:4. It states that a virtuous woman (a man too) is a crown. A “crown” suggests a throne. A “crown” suggests a kingdom. Have you ever heard the statement, “a man’s home is his castle”? The familiar old quote suggests a place where people can have things the way they want. When you are blessed with a good mate, you will be as happy as though you were a king or queen. You might get beat down in this world, but when the long day is done and you step wearily into your home, you are royalty! Receiving respect, honor and love then is a crown.
A practical example of this would be when a wife speaks in a respectful, honoring tone or when a husband speaks in a loving and gentle way, then the home becomes kingly or queenly. It is a fact that while men and women are profoundly different, all of us appreciate receiving respect and honor! If husbands and wives see their differences as endearing rather than annoying then they will have a home of honor and respect.
The devil is out to destroy every home. The devil is out to lure people into things that will hurt and destroy lives. God has given married couples a great gift, and that gift is the other person! Every home ought to be a place of honor and sanctity, a place where you can come home and feel like your children and your wife (or husband) and others are respectful.
2. Attitudes and Actions Are Either a Public Rebuke or Praise
“…a virtuous woman is a crown to her husband” (Proverbs 12:4).
We are either a crown or a crumb! A crown doesn’t make a person a king. A crown is just a symbol of something. It is a sign that a great honor has taken place. A crown reflects the position bestowed. Our attitudes are crowns. They can become a reflection of who my mate is. When my attitude is sour then I am saying publicly, my mate is sour. If I have the time to serve God in ministry, then much of the credit goes to my wife who has put off her own needs to take care of our home life so that I can serve the Lord. If I have energy and I am not always sick, my wife gets the kudos because she plans balanced and healthy meals and makes sure that we are not always just eating fast food. If I am at peace tonight and if I have a gentle spirit, my wife is to be honored because she has met my intimate needs.
There are also ways that a husband may “crown” his wife. Dear Lady, if you have a husband who willingly provides for your housing, food and transportation needs, you ought to praise him. You may also be earning some income, but God designed that the husband is the accountable one and therefore you do not have to bear that burden.
When an attitude is moody, grumpy and crabby, it is a public rebuke to our mate that they are not meeting our needs. When we walk around with a sour expression it is as if we were saying to everybody, “If I had a better husband or a better wife, things would be so much better.” A crown is a visible symbol – it is the thing that everybody sees first. When you see a person with this beautiful crown, your eyes are drawn to the crown. Our tone, our choice of words, our facial expressions are all “crowns.” We represent our mate – therefore we should be a positive reflection.
Not only should correcting each other publicly be avoided, respect should be given and noticed in the home as well. When the children sass their dad, mom you ought to straighten them up right away! One day as a junior age boy I got the big idea I would call my mom the “old” lady. I came home and said that phrase about mom and my dad looked at me with a glaring look that said, “I do not believe what you just said boy!” Now, when dad’s steel blue eyes would bore into me and his lips would get 1/8 of an inch thin, I knew things were about ready to take off! From that day forward I said to myself, “since I value my life…I will never say that again.” Make sure that your home is a place of sanctity. Make sure that others recognize that this is the place where the husband is honored and where the wife is esteemed.