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Summary: How can you build a stronger marriage? What can you do to improve your marriage and make it into what God designed a marriage to be? (based on sermon series by Craig Groeschel, The Vow)

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A Solemn Promise Pt2- Pursuit

Introduction

(based on sermon series by Craig Groeschel, The Vow)

Continue with our series- A Solemn Promise- Pursuit

In Hot Pursuit

How many made- fool of yourselves-in- name of love-

trying to impress- someone- opposite sex, did crazy things would never do today?

Drove many miles- Baltimore Harbor Tunnel- 1st date- wore black/white checkered pants, white turtle neck sweater, black jacket.

It is amazing what people do in the name of love.

Mating rituals of animals- bird- sticks out chest and bows down to get a girl bird. Guys will puff out their chest to impress a girl- look at VIDEO.

One characteristic of people (men)-

By nature, we pursue what we do not have.

Guys- do all sorts of things to win a girl- things they would never do now- hours on- phone, chick flicks.

After men make the kill- all efforts to pursue stop.

This is when many problems begin in marriages.

What area of life can you not pursue/see improvement-

body-eat bad/no exercise, yard-no water/fertilize

Why do we think-can neglect-marriage and-get better?

Marriages that fail-one/both partners-stopped pursuing

A Solemn Promise

Review our First Solemn Promise from last week-

I promise that God will be my #ONE priority and my spouse will be my #TWO priority.

Second Solemn Promise-

I promise to always pursue my #TWO.

Gen 2:22-24

Leave- to loosen, let go of what you are holding and commit to something new-

to relinquish parents for spouse, but God is #1.

Joined- cling/adhere, fasten oneself to, stick like glue.

Our pursuit of our spouse must not end once married.

One couple- an example of hard pursuit (Gen 29)-

Jacob- loved Rachel, her father Laban made him work seven years for her- Laban pulled a switch- gave him her sister. Laban told Jacob he had to work another 7 years for Rachel.

Beauty of this story- married Rachel at- end of the first seven years, but Jacob continued to pursue Rachel.

God- looking for those who will always pursue Him as #ONE and their spouse as #TWO.

Sometimes-have good intentions-never become actions

We judge our spouse by his or her actions, but we judge ourselves by our intentions.

I was thinking about it, I just did not get around to it-

we must turn our intentions into actions.

Assignment (next seven days)

1. Say it!

Speak words of blessing and encouragement daily.

Heb 3:13

Learn to say thank you- thank you for-

cooking a nice dinner for me,

putting the toilet seat down,

last night- it was great fun,

picking up your clothes, etc.

Men- Pursue your spouse w/words of affection.

Why? Women enjoy being told that you love them.

Men, you may not know what that means-

words of affection- non-sexual words- affection.

Gentlemen-you can do all things through Christ Ph 4:13.

Ladies- Pursue- spouse w/words of affirmation.

Why? As confident as men want to appear, they need to know that you believe in them.

No matter how he acts-your opinion- important to him.

Men have been taught by the world, incorrectly, that he is only as good as his last accomplishment.

Important for men to know- wives think they did good.

2. Do it!

Consider how to do something special for one another.

Ja 4:17

Men- bath-children, unload-dishwasher, vacuum-rugs.

On way to HC-Bonnie asked me- carry her Bible

If you think it is special to her, do it.

Ladies- you know what is special to your husband- what is the first and only thing on his mind? Do it!

Men- what you did yesterday does not count today- with women all points evaporate at midnight.

3. Be it!

If you want something different in your marriage/life, or relationship w/someone, be something different.

Instead of whining about what you do not have or about what he/she is not doing, you be different.

Bring less of you and more of Christ into the relationship.

You will not be judged on- other persons performance.

Rom12:2(NLT)Don’t copy the behavior/customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think …

Men- women- multipliers- multiply what- give them-

give them ugly house- make it beautiful

give them money for food- make great meals

give them a hard time- they give you hell

Men, if you do not like what you are getting, look at what you are giving.

To get something you have never had, you must do something you have never done.

If you had something special and you lost it-

To get what you once had, you must do what you once did.

What you once did, particularly men, is you pursued-

Make it less about you and more about Christ.

Not married? (hard assignment, but true)

If- not married- to truly prepare yourself for marriage- you must pursue joy NOW over discontentment.

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