Summary: Complacency in marriage is a termite! If we are complacent in marriage, we can also be complacent in our relationship with God.
Sermon No. 05
February 9, 2014
Mabini, Tagum City
Overview of the message
The message this afternoon is about staying lovable and attractive in the eyes of our spouses during the marriage union. Falling in love with our spouses is easy. The hard part, it seems, is staying in love, lovable and attractive in the midst of all the family concerns and pressures. What does the Word of God say about how we should treat our spouses? How can we stay lovable till death do us part? Our main verse today is found in Psalms 17:8: Keep me as the apple of your eye; hide me in the shadow of your wings.
Part II. Discussion
A. Romantic beginnings
You will agree with me that before we said “till death do us part” to our spouses, we passed through courtship first. Courtship is probably the most exciting and romantic moment of all. We could not understand our feelings; we are “kilig” to the bones; we day-dream; we could hardly wait to see each other; we are blooming and happy; we are blind. Song of Songs 5:2 says “I slept, but my heart was awake.” We too could hardly sleep at night imagining our lovers. The mystery of falling in love!
There are many ways to express our love and care. We give flowers; serenade; do household chores; write letters, songs and poems; send sweet text messages; pray and go to church together; date; and even promise the stars and moon. Nothing could stop us from following our hearts’ desires! As King Solomon says in Song of Songs 8:7: Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it.”
During courtship, we put our best foot forward. We were very patient; good listener; compassionate and loving; we looked healthy and smelled good; protective and jealous; mindful of our words; grateful and apologetic; prayerful and attended church together regularly; and we sacrificed for love. We do almost everything to please our prince charming and princess!
According to Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages, the “in love” experience is euphoric. We are emotionally obsessed with each other. We go to sleep thinking of one another. When we rise that person is the first thought on our minds. We long to be together. Spending time together is like playing in the anteroom of heaven. When we hold hands, it seems as if our blood flows together. The person “in love” has the illusion that his or her beloved is perfect. Our parents and friends can see the flaws but we can’t. A mother once said to her daughter: “Darling, have you considered he has been under psychiatric care for five years?” But she replies, “Oh mother, give me a break. He has been out for three weeks now.” Indeed, it is hard to believe anything else when you are in love.
B. Apple of the eye
Psalm 17: 8 paints a picture wherein King David was surrounded by his wicked and mortal enemies. He was in the midst of trials and persecutions as king of Israel. Under the weight of such burden and pressure he cried to God saying “Keep me as the apple of the eye; hide me in the shadow of your wings.” The phrase “apple of the eye” refers to something or someone that one cherishes above all others; a most prized possession; a priority. It speaks primarily of endearment, care and protection as can be seen in Deuteronomy 32:10 says: “He found him in a desert land, and in the howling waste of the wilderness; he encircled him, he cared for him, he kept him as the apple of his eye.”
The phrase “apple of the eye” conveys the value and importance that one perceives concerning someone or something. In effect, King David was saying: “Lord, continue to cherish and value me; continue to love, care and protect me; and continue to shower me with the wonder of your great love. Do not forsake or neglect me” When someone is the apple of the eye it means he or she is the focus and center of attraction.
King David knew that he was the apple of God’s eye. King David deserved it because he was a man of God’s own heart. He kept God’s laws and commandments despite the presence of his enemies, responsibilities as king of Israel. He kept pleasing God and making himself “lovable” in God’s sight.
In the context of marriage, we know that our spouse love us; but have we endeavored to be always lovable to our spouses and apple of their eyes – the focus and center of attraction? This is very important because the enemy is out there working 24 hours to destroy the institution of marriage and family by getting us, our spouses, and our children out of God’s love and love for one another. 1 Peter 5:8 reminds us to be watchful because the adversary prowls around like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour. Even if we think that our marriage is strong or we have overcome the latest trial, we must continue to be watchful since the enemy is just waiting for an opportune time.