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Summary: God has clearly defined the roles and responsibilities of the husband and the wife for a peaceful and happy co-habitation. However, neglect of one’s responsibility and failure to meet up with the required expectation often lead to one or more crisis in

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THE CAUSES AND MANAGEMENT OF CRISIS IN MARRIAGE

Study Text: 1 Peter 3: 1-7:

Likewise, wives, be in subjection to your own husbands, so that if any do not obey the Word, they may also be won without the Word by the conduct of the wives,

1Pe 3:2 having witnessed your chaste behavior in the fear of God.

1Pe 3:3 Of whom let not be the adorning of garments, or outward braiding of hair and wearing of gold, or of putting on clothing,

1Pe 3:4 but let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, the meek and quiet spirit, which is of great price in the sight of God.

1Pe 3:5 For so once indeed the holy women hoping in God adorned themselves, being in subjection to their own husbands;

1Pe 3:6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord; whose children you became, doing good and fearing no terror.

1Pe 3:7 Likewise, husbands, live together according to knowledge, giving honor to the wife as to the weaker vessel, the female, as truly being co-heirs together of the grace of life, not cutting off your prayers.

God has clearly defined the roles and responsibilities of the husband and the wife for a peaceful and happy co-habitation. However, neglect of one’s responsibility and failure to meet up with the required expectation often lead to one or more crisis in the home. We shall look into the study under two headings:

1. CAUSES OF CRISIS IN MARRIAGE

2. MANAGEMENT OF CRISIS IN MARRIAGE

1. CAUSES OF CRISIS IN MARRIAGE

It is not possible to generate a conclusive list of the factors capable of causing crisis in marriage. This depend on the people concern and varies from one marriage to another, but the following are very common in many marriage relationships.

1. Money.

Of course, money would be first. Money causes all kinds of problems. It doesn’t matter if you have too much or not enough money. Either way you get conflict. Usually you have one spouse that is a free spender and one that is a saver. These don’t mix. Working out a compromise that both can agree with takes time, effort and trial and error.

2. In-Laws.

Now there is a word that sends couples into hiding. There should be a written rule book about how to deal with in-laws. Even if both spouses get along great with their in-laws conflict still arises over where to spend the holidays, when to visit family and when and how often for in-laws to visit them.

3. Children.

Things are going along just fine and then comes the kids. Kids can cause conflict of all types. Deciding what faith to raise them in and how to discipline them are probably the ones that cause the most problems.

4. Sex.

It is a rare marriage where this is not an area of conflict. Women think intimacy, men think sex. There is a difference. The key is to express yourself and your needs to your spouse. Women and men are wired differently and it is important to try and understand the other persons needs and wants. Do not deprive one another, unless it is with consent for a time, so that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer. And come together again so that Satan does not tempt you for your incontinence. [1 Corinthians 7: 5]

5. Communication.

Say what you mean and mean what you say. We should all live by this. If we did maybe there would be no more misunderstandings.

6. Infidelity.

When one of the partner is not faithful with marriage vows, or when there is a suspicion of it, there will be crises in the home. This will break down the trust in marriage and will promote selfish interests.

7. Food:

Food is a very important factor in marriage and issues with food may cause serious crisis in marriage. These range from the non-availability, differences in the type and the style of preparing, and other matters about it.

Learn to accept your differences. No two people are alike and sometimes differences can be good. The key to a happy successful marriage is learning to thrive on your differences. Make it a good thing not a bad thing.

A successful marriage is built within the biblical truth of God. Remember that God is part of your marriage. “For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.” Matthew 18:20. If both spouses are believers, God is with them.

2, MANAGEMENT OF CRISIS IN MARRIAGE

1. Understand that happiness comes within. If you are one of those people that says "my partner doesn't make me happy", maybe you should consider for a moment why you thought they would? True happiness comes from within, and unless your partner is a true horror of humanity, a thoroughly unpleasant person, chances are the only reason you are unhappy is because of something inside yourself, some unfulfilled potential or hidden dream.

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